I've got an out

[Dizzylady80]

My previous plans were ruined due to my roommate finding out and due to lack of money, but I've got a new out. My dad is gonna be coming up to my town so that I can buy him drugs, and so I asked him to bring a rifle that was left to me by my granddad when he died. It sucks that I've got to interact with my dad because that's very triggering for me but it's worth it. I would've gone and gotten it myself a while ago but I can't really drive long distances due to my condition. So yeah. Idk if I'm gonna pick a date or just off myself the day after he brings it. Probably the latter. I can't stand the thought of waiting anymore

I guess I'm sharing this here because I don't want to be alone in knowing what I'm doing? Idk. I just feel so alone in this. Everything I do or say irl feels so fake, like I'm lying or putting on a facade so as to not further hurt the ones I care about. But y'all know what's up, y'all already know why I'm here, so it doesn't matter if I'm honest

I've heard that rifles aren't the best choice of firearm for this which makes sense, I just don't have any other options. Too poor to get even a cheap shotgun. So this'll do. Planning on sticking it in my mouth and going for the brainstem, which is trickier than with a pistol or shotgun. If I doubt my aim too much I might see about going for the heart, but idk how that'd work logistically so hope it doesn't come to that

Anyways. I'll make a goodbye post before it happens. Probably in the next week or two. Idk what I'd be saying goodbye for as I don't really know anyone here, but y'all seem like good people and I really do wish you the best

 

[Nimbus]

I'm sorry that you will have to interact with your dad in this way. That seems like an awful situation to be in but if he will bring you what you need, I can understand why you'd do it, in the absence of any other options.

If you do decide to make a goodbye post, know that there will be support here for you.

 

[Dark Spring]

I want you to be better, whatever your decision here you can count on me if you need to talk about anything. You are not alone, you have many people here who will support you in whatever you think is best for you.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

If I doubt my aim too much I might see about going for the heart, but idk how that'd work logistically so hope it doesn't come to that

My post history speaks for itself, so I hope you won't take this comment as a pro-life BS. And of course you don't know me, so I don't expect you to trust me. I just feel compelled to respond, do with it what you decide is best for you.

I had a close friend whose mother shot herself in the chest with a rifle and survived.

I had a coworker who, while we were working together, had a friend whose son shot himself in the temple with a rifle and survived.

Based on this, personally, I would only ever attempt with a rifle by aiming for the brain stem. I have no idea what the success ratio is for this, I haven't researched it since GSW is not my method.

I'm a bit...triggered by the GSW method, but I try to speak up whenever I see something concerning. I'm really sorry your life is in such a place where you're considering suicide, and while I feel that way about everyone, I feel it even more so with this method in particular. Sending compassion and wishes for the best possible outcomes, whatever you decide.

 

[ovaltinee99]

I'm sorry it has come to this, and I'm sorry about your having to meet your dad. I hope that whatever you choose in the end gives you all the peace you need. Sending love.

 

[Ghost2211]

Sorry to hear you need to deal with your dad. Please read the guns guide in the resource. Aiming for the heart is a very bad idea.

 

[Dizzylady80]

My post history speaks for itself, so I hope you won't take this comment as a pro-life BS. And of course you don't know me, so I don't expect you to trust me. I just feel compelled to respond, do with it what you decide is best for you.

I had a close friend whose mother shot herself in the chest with a rifle and survived.

I had a coworker who, while we were working together, had a friend whose son shot himself in the temple with a rifle and survived.

Based on this, personally, I would only ever attempt with a rifle by aiming for the brain stem. I have no idea what the success ratio is for this, I haven't researched it since GSW is not my method.

I'm a bit...triggered by the GSW method, but I try to speak up whenever I see something concerning. I'm really sorry your life is in such a place where you're considering suicide, and while I feel that way about everyone, I feel it even more so with this method in particular. Sending compassion and wishes for the best possible outcomes, whatever you decide.

Thank you for telling me this despite it being upsetting for you, I really appreciate it and it helped. I'm pretty worried about the consequences of a failed attempt, plus I didn't want a closed casket, but the opportunity presented itself. So if I end up not being confident about my aim I'll scrap the gun plan