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silence ends

Student
Jan 10, 2023
114
Wich pills u got?
I abused my adhd meds, got bit manic effect with them and that way forgot shitty reality but nowadays i just get more anxious if i abuse them.
 
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momento.mori

Wake me up next year...
Mar 18, 2024
157
Ambien. I saved them up so on my bad days I could sleep them away. I was up all night and forced to stay woke now, it sucks.
Wich pills u got?
I abused my adhd meds, got bit manic effect with them and that way forgot shitty reality but nowadays i just get more anxious if i abuse them.
I would love to be in a manic state! I never knew that could be a side effect of abusing them.
 
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momento.mori

Wake me up next year...
Mar 18, 2024
157
Oh I'm definitely there in that group. Can't stand this any longer but currently under suicide watch in hospital.
How's the staff treating you? I was previously admitted on hold and a complete joke. To think you can fix someone in 3 days is ridiculous! I'll never go back!
 
thepiecessatup

thepiecessatup

Member
Jan 9, 2024
91
How's the staff treating you? I was previously admitted on hold and a complete joke. To think you can fix someone in 3 days is ridiculous! I'll never go back!
Like I'm not a person. Mental health is just an annoyance for them. I can't stand it. They keep getting my meds wrong. It took three days to get my antidepressant. They are late with meds all the time. It's literally making me more suicidal.
 
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silence ends

Student
Jan 10, 2023
114
Ambien. I saved them up so on my bad days I could sleep them away. I was up all night and forced to stay woke now, it sucks.

I would love to be in a manic state! I never knew that could be a side effect of abusing them.
Yeah i used methylphenidate intravenously, usually with some alcohol. Alcohol converts methylphenidate into ethylphenidate.
IV usage is dump and wouldnt have done it if i wasnt sure im going for ctb. Luckily got only minor infections with some lung problems wich are, far as i know, permanent but i dont mind since not gonna suffer for long anyway
 
M

momento.mori

Wake me up next year...
Mar 18, 2024
157
Like I'm not a person. Mental health is just an annoyance for them. I can't stand it. They keep getting my meds wrong. It took three days to get my antidepressant. They are late with meds all the time. It's literally making me more suicidal.
The staff in those places are horrible and lack empathy! I'm sorry you're having a tough time, I really understand. I won't say my occupation but I worked on a psych unit and on the wristbands we put on people the last 2 numbers were the amount of times you were admitted and I've seen staff laugh, even the social worker! I always said who cares how many times, least they are trying. We had some people who would refuse to discharge because it was the only place they felt safe. In my case, I came very sick because my friends and kids called on me. I wasn't suicidal that day I was actually sleep when the police came. I felt so betrayed that once I returned home I changed my number and cut everyone off, yes, even my kids! What they didn't understand is that was traumatic for me as I was sexually assaulted when I was younger and it felt the same way! I didn't go to any classes I just slept and stayed sick. The staff couldn't simply see me a physically sick so I was miserable. I'll never go back and I only took my new psych medication so I could discharge and go home. If you really want the help attend the classes, if you don't just say you are feeling much better everyday and they will discharge you soon. Best wishes.
Yeah i used methylphenidate intravenously, usually with some alcohol. Alcohol converts methylphenidate into ethylphenidate.
IV usage is dump and wouldnt have done it if i wasnt sure im going for ctb. Luckily got only minor infections with some lung problems wich are, far as i know, permanent but i dont mind since not gonna suffer for long anyway
I can't believe you survived especially doing it via IV, how creative. It's difficult to kill yourself and not as easy as people think. I have Norco and benzos but I'm scared of another failed attempt. I saved those too so when the time came I would be prepared. If I get it wrong I'll never get those medications again.
 
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Immensevoid

Member
Sep 10, 2023
79
Now I'm forced to live in this reality! I just wish I could sleep forever!
I know it's terrible.. Lately I've been using a medication to sleep as much as possible but I'm building tolerance and it doesn't work like before..😞
 
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