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I'm just realizing how ridiculous this sounds. I'm sitting here thinking about how I'm going to be able to drink my SN outside without alerting someone or getting in trouble. I'm thinking about this like it's a tuesday. I'm just plotting my suicide like it's an average day. And it's not even shotgun suicide, it's just SN, that poisonous painful drink.
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dwtsleepy123, Forever Sleep, Praestat_Mori and 4 others
hi. i have been like that for the last 48 hours too, just "what i am going to do?"???? yeah,, it seems insane even in autopilot.. never thought i had the guts to get this far ... hmpf thought impulse would get the best
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Praestat_Mori, WAITING TO DIE, gonnaregretthis and 1 other person
If you can imagine drinking SN like it's another ordinary day you're lucky. I feel a panic reaction if I let myself think seriously how drinking it will work or feel. I can't even look at the bottles of it I have.
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Praestat_Mori, WAITING TO DIE and ultrasharpy123456
I think that's a good thing, at least for me. I'm trying to view this just like any other mundane, unpleasant task (not that the ramifications are lost on me).
I'm in the same frame of mind.
I think you just get to certain point where there is absolutely no doubt that ctb is the only option you have left.
You feel this way for so long that the fear of suicide no longer carries any weight.
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