Jumaqt
Member
- Sep 18, 2025
- 7
I orginally planned to hang myself at home, I had the supplies ready and did my researchs months ago and have been mentally preparing myself since then. I also finished writing my notes during the time, now finally feeling more ready to go, but then I realized that killing myself at the house is gonna bring the house price down and stuff, making life even more diffcult for my family, plus just having my dead body being so accessible is traumatizing too, should probably let the police or doctors access it first. Then I considered hanging myself in nearby forest at night, now there are a whole bunch more things to consider, the forest is pretty developed what if there's a chance I get discovered by someone before I reach full brain death, a person hanging from a tree is a pretty obvious scene, plus I am afraid of the dark, I'm worried about myself freaking out during the process or something else. Then I considred a different method like sodium nitrite or sodium azide, I would probably freakout less if I consume salt as a method instead in the dark... since there are less movement and preparations in order, don't know how I came to that conclusion but I feel like it would be less scary for me if there was less movements. I currently couldn't find anyways to find sodium nitrite no matter how much I try, I've been researching about the ukraine site for a while now but no results, I can currently find a place to buy sodium azide but from what I've read its a lot more painful than sodium nitrite. I would also take a few more insufferable weeks for these item to be delivered to me once I purchased them, or even longer, I would also need test knit on top of that..and what if the ukraine site only accept BTC as payment method.. I have no idea how to buy BTC. If only guns are more accessible in Canada, I can probably afford one if there were.
Last edited:
