It's really hard to even plan for a future when you know tomorrow will be bad if not worse

[ikadasui]

I really only expect to maybe have a good day if a video game is dropping or updating... otherwise I know in advance my day is just going to be some level of horrible. I can't stomach social media anymore seeing happy people or good looking people just throws me into despair knowing I've never had nor will I ever experience that. It's true torture, and when the mental anguish just isn't cutting it I usually have some kind of physical ailment to go along with it to really keep me in the fucking dirt. This life is abysmal and frankly I don't want to die, but the actual chance of salvaging this or having a good life with all the damage done is impossible. Next to no education, teeth rotting in my skull from ED and depression neglect in my youth along with a myriad of other fucked up things. I'd consider 24hrs without physical pain to be a divine intervention at this point... just a mere 24hrs of no pain would be a fucking miracle

 

[CommitSudoku]

Good title there (good as in relatable anyways). I'm not entirely sure I can even plan things anymore. I only have vague things that might happen if I get there and I'm very non-committal. Perhaps if I decided on something I had to do it would make forcing myself through the days to get there better, but there's nothing like that. Nothing I *want* anyways. Any good video games you've got lately at least? I usually don't get anything from games anymore myself. I hope you don't get to that point if you can still find enjoyment in them. I'm not on social media either, SS is probably the closest to it. Great community here but then I spend too much time here as well and yet again accomplish nothing, since my words mean nothing and my head just ends up hurting while I feel even more empty as soon as I log out. I'm sorry to hear you're in so much physical pain, and that you've had and have so much working against you. Is there any way any of the physical issues/pain could be addressed or is that again out of your control?

 

[ikadasui]

Good title there (good as in relatable anyways). I'm not entirely sure I can even plan things anymore. I only have vague things that might happen if I get there and I'm very non-committal. Perhaps if I decided on something I had to do it would make forcing myself through the days to get there better, but there's nothing like that. Nothing I *want* anyways. Any good video games you've got lately at least? I usually don't get anything from games anymore myself. I hope you don't get to that point if you can still find enjoyment in them. I'm not on social media either, SS is probably the closest to it. Great community here but then I spend too much time here as well and yet again accomplish nothing, since my words mean nothing and my head just ends up hurting while I feel even more empty as soon as I log out. I'm sorry to hear you're in so much physical pain, and that you've had and have so much working against you. Is there any way any of the physical issues/pain could be addressed or is that again out of your control?

Elden Ring and triangle strategy are my current games! Granted I'm kinda in the same boat and have a really hard time playing games anymore sadly. Honestly I'd need a ton of money to fix all my dental issues and that would solve most of my pain and give me a new smile so I wouldn't be ashamed so it'd be a big start. It's pretty overwhelming all around and frankly since I don't know if I'll even be around I'm stuck in limbo of not wanting to waste so much money on it vs throw paycheck after paycheck and pray it helps

 

[CommitSudoku]

Elden Ring and triangle strategy are my current games! Granted I'm kinda in the same boat and have a really hard time playing games anymore sadly. Honestly I'd need a ton of money to fix all my dental issues and that would solve most of my pain and give me a new smile so I wouldn't be ashamed so it'd be a big start. It's pretty overwhelming all around and frankly since I don't know if I'll even be around I'm stuck in limbo of not wanting to waste so much money on it vs throw paycheck after paycheck and pray it helps

What do you think of Elden Ring? A coworker briefly mentioned it was worth it, I saw the trailer and for all of 5 minutes was inspired to play again. ...then looked up reviews and saw it would probably be way over my level of ability. Is there any hope for someone unskilled to get enjoyment out of it?

It really sucks losing interest in hobbies. I always wanted to play video games and wasn't able to until college, and now... any time I have I'm unable to, or don't find the enjoyment. It's kind of unfair really.

So for fixing your teeth irregardless of if you had the resources for it, is that dependent on you deciding on a course of action? Basically is it something that could be decided on, I guess. I'm getting a bit tired, but I hate the ritual for falling asleep lol anyways, is it dependent on that, or if suddenly you were told, "this is getting fixed," would that then influence your course of action?

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

I deleted all my social media. They were making me worse. Maybe you should think about delete yours too

 

[Mtnwildflowers]

I deleted all my social media. They were making me worse. Maybe you should think about delete yours too

Honestly social media is a waste of time and gets even weirder and more pointless as you grow up. Why would I want to scroll through pictures of the kids of people I went to high school with who I really didn't care about even then? I don't honestly care to keep up with them after years have passed…why sit and waste my time watching their 2 year old do something most of the world thinks is pointless (minus the actual parents)?? People think social media is such a big deal during adolescent years..wait until you're in your 30s and realize you wasted so much of your time caring so much about it.

 

[OnlyWinOnce]

I agree and it's why I've given up on expecting things to get better in the future, despite what my friends keep assuring me.

 

[FuneralCry]

This life really is so awful, I'm sorry that you are suffering. Dealing with health problems can be one of the worst things about living. I have so much dread for each day and I know that things will only get worse for me. I wish you the best in whatever happens.

 

[SuicidallyCurious]

Several major central banks have set interest rates to negative globally.


What does that tell you?

That is your government telling you straight up they project today is better to tomorrow . If they're telling you money is worth less in the future via their policies take the hint

 

[Journeytoletgo]

Exactly why plan for a loss battle? That was my mindset since teens, this entire experience was a waste of time and could have ended the pain in my teens