It's 3 a.m. One day in the future I will already be dead at this hour.

[Sakura.]

It's already 3 a.m. where I live. I lay there for nearly three hours trying to fall asleep, but I couldn't. I gave up just before 3 a.m., decided to get up, and at that moment I realised:

that one day, at this very hour, I'll be finally dead.


If I decide to take the SN at exactly midnight, just as so many people have done before, at 2.57 am, when I thought about all this, I will no longer be here. I will finally take that step which I have been denying myself for already 14 years...

It will be all over. The difficult but necessary period of unpleasant symptoms will be over, the loss of consciousness will be over, the complete cessation of the substance's effects will be over and my loss of life will be over. I will finally be dead.


And in my case, this is already the only positive thing that can happen to me in my life...

 

[Rihan]

I never really thought about death that way before. It can be comforting to think that you will eventually be dead at this hour.
No matter whether I decide to CTB, it will happen. Personally, that thought calms me.

 

[tomame]

this actually brings be a lot of comfort

 

[eternallyjanedoe]

That is such a beautiful thought that I'll definitely be thinking about for a while. It's little realizations like that that got me out of my main fear of death itself (or the 'experiencing' of it.) I've never fully gotten out of the fear of being dead, though, so thank you so much for sharing this! This is very comforting for me, and it already has eased some of my anxiety.

 

[Unlucked]

This is a comforting thought actually. As in the inevitability. Like its gonna happen either or not.