Venting It feels like there's nothing for me here

[petiterat]

I have no goals. No dreams. I don't want anything, other than to die. All I can think about is dying; it consumes me. I go to bed, hoping to wake up, and I wake up, hoping to die. It has been this way for over 10 years, and I'm tired. I don't know why I'm still here. I don't know why all my attempts fail. It feels like death doesn't even want me — that's how useless I am.

 

[Alexei_Kirillov]

I feel the same way. Death scorns me.

 

[pthnrdnojvsc]

what will matter 1000 years from now?

Nothing.

however I don't want to suffer and i certainly don't want to suffer extreme torture so I want to kill these monstrous cells they call a human body i'm inprisoned in asap.

what will matter in 130 Years? what will matter 1000 years from now?
in 10,000 years , in a trillion years?

no one can convince me that there is anything objectively good or important . life is fleeting meaningless painful garbage. life is meaningless suffering prison slavery torture an evil imposition

The only thing that matters to me is avoiding unbearable pain and extreme suffering

the pleasurable addictions which pale in comparison to the worst pain are just meaningless bait and i hate these addictions

 

[petiterat]

I don't want to suffer anymore. I just want to fade away.

what will matter 1000 years from now?

Nothing.

however I don't want to suffer and i certainly don't want to suffer extreme torture so I want to kill these monstrous cells they call a human body i'm inprisoned in asap.

what will matter in 130 Years? what will matter 1000 years from now?
in 10,000 years , in a trillion years?

no one can convince me that there is anything objectively good or important . life is fleeting meaningless painful garbage. life is meaningless suffering prison slavery torture an evil imposition

The only thing that matters to me is avoiding unbearable pain and extreme suffering

the pleasurable addictions which pale in comparison to the worst pain are just meaningless bait and i hate these addictions

I don't want to exist, I don't want to be.

I don't want to suffer anymore, I just want to fade away.

But we are made of energy, and energy cannot be created nor destroyed. So, where will my energy go? It will be transformed or transferred onto someone else. What a horrible cycle we exist in.