Venting It disturbs me how an human can potentially suffer so much in this existence

[FuneralCry]

It truly does which is why no matter what I'd see it as better to cease existing, it's disturbing how there is no limit as to how much one can suffer, I see it as something so hellish having the ability to exist as a conscious being trapped in this decaying flesh prison. It disturbs me how a human is capable of suffering so much all while being aware of how futile and senseless it all is while they are just destined to decay and die anyway.

All that existence is, is just an endless cycle of cruelty and suffering that so tragically continues to repeat. Wanting suicide is all that makes sense to me, to prevent all future unnecessary suffering in this meaningless and undesirable existence.
Simply just existing is something so harmful and all that existence does is cause harm, it's objectively something so terrible being conscious and aware of this reality with the ability to suffer endlessly.

And all this is why it disgusts me when people try to push the idea of suicide prevention as the reality is that the true problem lies in existence rather than wanting to die, in fact wanting to be permanently relieved from having the ability to suffer is all that feels right to me.

One would have to be incredibly delusional to wish to exist as a conscious being in this hellish reality where chance so senselessly determines everything as existence truly is evil, it's like a virus to me that just creates harm and suffering, and the only safety from suffering lies in death.
It's so disgusting how humans so cruelly procreate and wish to deny those who they cursed with the ability to suffer a right to die in peace. It horrifies me how this world is filled with endless agony and torture, it's insane to see existence as desirable.

 

[sadslime]

yeah. this entire world is built on suffering, I don't see how it's any better than what people claim hell to be

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

We are just meat sacks that are slowly dying with each passing day, and suffering is guaranteed the older we become.
We also experience pain much more than pleasure.
Its horrifying how much pain a body can experience. I understand that we need pain to warn us of certain things, yet why are we capable of feeling unbearable agony ?
It makes no sense.
The human body is a disgusting, poorly designed pile of meat. And we are forced into existing in these meat prisons for a potentially horrifying number of years until we are so old that we resemble the living dead.
And of course we have to endure this existence in a prison world society that also kills the mind.

 

[Peaceful Departure]

I agree with everything you said! Plenty of people have lives worth living, but so many of us don't. A decade ago i thought if things ever got to a point where i knew life wasn't worth it anymore i would simply end my life. Now i've suffered about 50x past that point, maybe more. It's disgusting. I feel like i've gone crazy. I'm certainly unrecognizable from who i saw myself as. I just wish it was easier to ctb.
The only method i feel confident i could do is via shotgun to the head. Everything else just seems too likely to fail or be incredibly painful, for my liking. Jumping is my only viable option. 1 day i hope.
@FuneralCry what keeps you from ctb-ing?

 

[FuneralCry]

@FuneralCry what keeps you from ctb-ing?

The fact that in my case suicide methods are either inacessible or risky, the thought of a suicide attempt going wrong and just leading to more suffering is what terrifies me. I really hate how we exist in this hellish anti-suicide society where we cannot have the option to just die in peace in a guaranteed way.

 

[undecided]

YAAAAAWN

 

[silentnights56]

Suffering knows no limits, but pleasure is transient and fleeting