• ⚠️ UK Access Block Notice: Beginning July 1, 2025, this site will no longer be accessible from the United Kingdom. This is a voluntary decision made by the site's administrators. We were not forced or ordered to implement this block.

LostZombie

LostZombie

Transgirl Chemist
Oct 10, 2025
23
I have been suicidal since I was 8 year old, and it had always been clear to me the reason of it. Yet the more and more I grew I started to understand myself better, and I have over time realized, I don't want to escape my consciousness per say. I wanted to exit the human's being, yet I am stuck as the being of the human. So our only option is to discard our being; we want to escape consciousness, to return to the eternity of darkness, without the human's being.

So I wonder is it the mind itself that causes suffering to our being, and not the other beings? Is it natural selection that causes our suffering? Well we are given pain receptors to alert us of danger so, is our SI causes suffering to the being or does it mean that danger is suffering? You don't need to be in any danger to suffer, isolation is the safest you can be, but we cry without companionship. So, suffering is part of the being no matter what. So when you ctb you no longer suffer, and by effect, you lose the human. The human is the host, and our mind is a parasite to it. Therefore, to be human is to suffer.

Yet I ask is to be, to suffer?
I say for there to be an end is to give a goal. To not reach there in a time is to fail, which is why ultimately yes why to be, you must suffer. If you don't want to be, I implore you not to be. It's okay not to be, its the being's choice if it wants to continue to be.



I will leave this off with a quote from Hamlet

To be, or not to be, that is the question:
Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer
The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune,
Or to take arms against a sea of troubles
And by opposing end them. To die—to sleep,
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: pthnrdnojvsc, grauzone and Forever Sleep
58Alice85

58Alice85

Autogynephile
Aug 31, 2025
211
I think it is exactly the opposite, the immaterial intellect is the real you, the flesh machine is the parasite relying upon you to keep it alive
 
  • Like
  • Informative
Reactions: itsgone2, LostZombie and Sadbanana
S

Sadbanana

God doesn't care
Aug 20, 2024
99
I was thinking about this a lot too. I also believe that conciousness(or whatever we are) is not really at fault for our suffering.

Our brains just have extremely crappy design in my opinion. It's not there to serve you as an individual, but it serves evolution. According to evolution you are supposed to survive certain time, until you are 30 or so and reproduce, there is little to no optimalization beyond these goals.

To be human is like balancing on a thin ice. Being isolated saves you from suffering of rejection and anxiety, but it makes your brain torture with loneliness you, because according to evolution you need community to ensure survival and reproduction. You can't even reliably numb your pain by consuming content, because the brain gets used to it. Suffering is a whip of the evolution, while dopamine is a carrot and we are nothing more than slaves to it.

It just doesn't metter if some outliers like me are going to have horrible time, if our wiring works well for most neurotipical poeple and the spiece as a whole.

We would not have to suffer at all if our brains weren't wired in that way.
 
  • Like
  • Informative
Reactions: pthnrdnojvsc, grauzone and LostZombie
NutOrat

NutOrat

Sleepwalking
Jun 11, 2025
50
People argue what really counts to be called suffering, but I think the word can describe any small pains in life. And life is built on small things, tiny micro-problems and aches that accompany you whatever you do. Small things in large enough quantity turn into bigger and bigger problems, snowballing to cause depression and suicidal thoughts. There are, of course, larger singular problems, but taken as a whole it's all just suffering. Mosquitos won't ruin your day on their own, but if you've already been feeling down, failing at basic tasks, have a headache, it's hot and you're all sweaty and feeling gross, you've sprained your ankle so walking is uncomfortable, and so on and so on, then yeah, they can make you snap and go into a really dark place, even if they're just measly mosquitos.

Maybe I misunderstood the question, though. Wouldn't be the first. I think to live is to suffer, always, in varying amounts, 24/7.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Ligottian, pthnrdnojvsc, grauzone and 1 other person
LostZombie

LostZombie

Transgirl Chemist
Oct 10, 2025
23
Our brains just have extremely crappy design in my opinion. It's not there to serve you as an individual, but it serves evolution. According to evolution you are supposed to survive certain time, until you are 30 or so and reproduce, there is little to no optimalization beyond these goals.

We would not have to suffer at all if our brains weren't wired in that way.
Our brains our designed crappy, but our brains have plans for us up until about 130. It's just we don't live an ideal world, and 70 would the start of your decline. However since we don't live in an ideal world we aren't really built to do that, and that is why so many kids died young before modern medicine it's because none of our life is optimized. It's honestly how ideal the world becomes that dictates how we evolve from this point on.

Our brains are meant to suffer as a way of SI, since if we didn't feel sad when we didn't get love, we would abandon our tribe, and die. So suffering is entailed into the human's being.
 
  • Like
Reactions: pthnrdnojvsc, grauzone, Sadbanana and 1 other person
F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
13,242
I suppose we have evolved to be highly sensitive to suffering because, in some cases, it can be life threatening. I suppose it links into the whole- why do negative emotions seem much stronger than positive ones? Not always of course.

But again, probably in the short- term, they keep us alive and that is an organisms core goal it would seem here- to stay alive. Interestingly, we are able to overcome our core drives to both survive and, reproduce ultimately though.

Suffering seems likely to some extent in life but, I think it can come from all sorts of sources. I suppose the brain registers it but, our bodies need pain receptors to tell us we've just cut ourselves say- and need to stop the bleeding. I suppose in terms of hurt feelings- what gets to a person most is more nuanced. It likely depends what they place value on and, what they expect from life. Plus, where they have resilience.

Whether we can learn to overcome suffering is maybe debatable. It's clear that some people are seemingly more able to shrug things off. Like water off a ducks back. I've known very optimistic people who seem to take even terrible things in their stride. Of course, they could be masking. Maybe they do just have a higher resilience though. Maybe they were taught different things. Taught to accept things maybe.

I've tended to find that these sorts of people have certain beliefs those who worry/ suffer more, don't. They don't tend to catastrophize. They realise that most things aren't actually the end of the world. They seemingly have enough confidence to believe they can cope in a given situation. They have enough love and support in life to not necessarily need approval from everyone. I've noticed those attributes tend to make for a very sound core, whereby the person at least appears to suffer less. Obviously, there's a whole bunch of other stuff going on too.

So, I think some suffering is inevitable but the amount varies greatly person to person. We may also do things that don't ultimately help us. Me included. I've pandered to my social anxiety and taken the easier option of isolating. Meaning that, should I have to be in a social situation again, I have no doubt I would suffer greatly.

I think that's where pity becomes complicated though. How sorry should we feel for ourselves and others, if we've done things that made our own suffering worse? I feel like I have to admire people who faced their fears to stop them from getting any worse. So- maybe we all suffer. But, maybe we also have some degree of control over the extent. (Not always of course.)

I think that's why there is sometimes frustration towards depressed/ suicidal people though. People get frustrated that we may not appear to be helping ourselves.

I imagine it is because we all do suffer to some extent, that this frustration is amplified- because, although we may all suffer, it's hard to guage how much. And, judge just how difficult a person finds something.

I imagine for instance, a lot of people dread going to work. They likely suffer psychologically and physically to some extent. So- will they be sympathetic to someone who insists they can't work but, who gets woolly on the details? I think it's this lack of full understanding that can cause friction.

You'd think that universal suffering would make us more empathetic but, I think it can have the reverse effect. If some people suffer but still fulfil the expectations placed on them eg. work to support themselves and others- why would they accept suffering as an excuse from others? Again- because they can't guage the amount and, they may not take into account whether they have better resilience, compared to the other person.

That's complicated too though because- resilence isn't necessarily intrinsic I imagine. We may learn to become resilient through suffering.

The more disturbing conclusion being that it's pretty much an expectation that we should all put ourselves through suffering to become more resilient.
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: NutOrat and LostZombie
LostZombie

LostZombie

Transgirl Chemist
Oct 10, 2025
23
What if this isn't true? What if it continues?

You could suffer even without the human.
The being is connected to the host. To assert otherwise is irrational, the same irrationality that tells you to live. You must also think where were you before being? We already know that you can not be, so we know you cannot be, and no proof of continuing to be after the host of the being is gone.
 
  • Like
Reactions: pthnrdnojvsc
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
45,363
Yes certainly, no matter what I'll always see this dreadful, cruel and torturous existence as only suffering with no limit as to how much one can be tortured, existence is an abomination that just causes harm and suffering and I suffer simply from being burdened with this existence, no matter what I'd never wish to be conscious of anything at all rather all I want is true peace and for me non-existence is just the only peace.
 
  • Like
  • Love
Reactions: 58Alice85, grauzone and LostZombie

Similar threads

F
Replies
8
Views
231
Offtopic
OvercastingClouds
OvercastingClouds
F
Replies
7
Views
187
Offtopic
Dejected 55
Dejected 55
bipolar22
Replies
5
Views
168
Suicide Discussion
cemeteryismyhome
cemeteryismyhome
batmanreal
Replies
4
Views
136
Suicide Discussion
Unhumanly.
Unhumanly.