I know this sounds horrible but I'm a horrible person anyways, so it doesn't matter. I want to purchase SN and I know what to do and where to get it and all of that good stuff. I also know it's not illegal to have it in your possession. I am 100% doing this to make my ex happy. It's very clear now that this is what he wants, and it's not a bad idea considering I have nothing ahead of me. My question- is it illegal to tell him once I've ordered it? Can the cops do anything? Cause they showed up one time when I was having a manic episode and said if I was alert and oriented they can't even take me to the mental hospital, nor can they do anything until I'm actively attempting. I feel like he might snitch so he won't get blamed because he knows that the happiness that will come to him from my death does come at a cost. I just want to make sure it's all good. Thank you guys in advance
Yomyom
Darker dearie, much darker
- Feb 5, 2020
- 923
What?????????
SunInTheShade9
Just want to go home ❤
- May 21, 2020
- 43
Excuse my French, but f*** that guy.
Sending virtual hugs. Xx
MeriDeath
Im on the edge of reality
- May 10, 2020
- 213
Since you acknowledge this, can you change yourself to not be horrible? This is about you and not your ex. You admitted that he was genuine and caring and even let you live with him despite a very short courtship (Dec to March) and you abused him and tried to hurt him? He is justified in his response of leaving an abusive relationship.
Taking your life is your choice and it doesn't sound at all like he wants you to ctb. And doing so will most likely only make him feel sad for you but in no way will it affect him like you are thinking.
What is the point of telling him you bought SN? You either want his sympathy or him to alert authorities.
None of this sounds illegal.
My guess here is you are starving for love but when shown love you reject it bcuz you don't know how to reciprocate it ... accept sexually. Love is so much more than sex. And if you can find a way to seek help in recognizing your behavior and trying to change .. you might Find the love You need.
you sound vindictive .. and I apologize for being blunt .. this will only hurt you. Love and respect yourself first.
whatever you decide ... I hope you can find peace
GoodPersonEffed
Brevity is my middle name, but my name was TL
- Jan 11, 2020
- 6,727
In response to the OP, speaking only literally, it is not illegal to tell your ex you have purchased a product with the intent to commit suicide. You cannot be arrested or imprisoned for telling him that.
It gives him power.
It gives him potential power to interfere with you being able to act on your choice to commit suicide, should you choose to do so.
If he is manipulating you into making that choice, then it sounds like you need some support. Not that you asked, but I would suggest calling DV and sexual abuse support hotlines to start.
It gives him power.
It gives him potential power to interfere with you being able to act on your choice to commit suicide, should you choose to do so.
If he is manipulating you into making that choice, then it sounds like you need some support. Not that you asked, but I would suggest calling DV and sexual abuse support hotlines to start.
autumnal
Enlightened
- Feb 4, 2020
- 1,950
I think the legality is the least of your worries, and what you really should focus on is the level of dysfunction in your 'relationship' and the mental illness and thought patterns which would convince you that killing yourself to make your ex happy is anything other than a very bad idea
Is the desire to tell him to some how maintain him in your life or recapture the relationship? I can't think of any other rationale other than you are trying to get him arrested or leave him with some sense of guilt, which I do not think either are the case.
Telling him would do nothing other than give him power over you, and it seems this is the Epitomization of a toxic relationship.
Telling him would do nothing other than give him power over you, and it seems this is the Epitomization of a toxic relationship.
autumnal
Enlightened
- Feb 4, 2020
- 1,950
Yes, I probably should have used that term myself. My use of 'dysfunctional' implies it can be made to function again, whereas 'toxic' signals the need to get the hell away from it at all costs!
Also, OP, I saw this comment from you in a previous thread:
He told me while we were dating even if we broke up he'd still always care. Now he doesn't give a shit about me in the slightest
To be blunt, everyone always says that, and usually genuinely means it during the actual relationship. But it often just doesn't work out that way when relationships end. It's certainly not a shortcoming or fault of the partner who makes those statements in good faith at the time.
It's a bit like gazing into someones eyes and saying 'I promise I will love you forever'. At the time you say it, you genuinely believe your feelings will last forever and nothing could possibly change them. But then circumstances and perceptions change, and feelings can change along with them. You wouldn't accuse an ex-partner of being a liar, nor demand they return to you based upon their obligation to honour that previous 'promise'.
I haven't read your threads in great detail, but it seems as if your concept of relationships is still a relatively immature one. This isn't surprising, seeing as you are still only 18, nor is it meant as a criticism. What would be concerning to me was if you made a serious decision (especially one such as suicide) based upon that still-developing notion of what a relationship is, how it can progress and how one can recover after it ends.
Note that I'm not suggesting you cannot rationally suicide based only upon your age. Rather, I'm suggesting you still lack some essential rationality in your concept of relationships, and this occurs by virtue of your age and relative inexperience.
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ssaaahmo
Experienced
- May 18, 2020
- 219
madgod
psycho, bi, wanting to die • 22
- May 26, 2020
- 51
never do this for someone else. it's not their choice. do it for yourself or stay alive.
autumnal
Enlightened
- Feb 4, 2020
- 1,950
Yeah, nope. Just nope.
Please read the responses here from myself and other members. Your whole concept of what a relationship is sounds juvenile, simplistic and dangerous, and you don't seem able to take on board when people here try to point this out. You post bizarre and unhealthy plans, and then when a shocked member asks 'What?', your first assumption is that they simply needed clarification, rather than that they were genuinely shocked at your post. As all of us probably are. Stop. Just stop. Stop contacting him, stop thinking about what you believe he might want you to do. Start imagining a future without him in your life, where the decisions you make are for your own welfare.
Note that I'm not suggesting he is in any way at fault or the problem. From your earlier thead, I'd say he's the main victim here, both of your previous abusive behaviour and of undeserved guilt from your proposed suicide attempt. But your attitude towards him and your misconceptions about what he would believe or want are so dangerously skewed that you need to stop having contact with him, because this contact just fuels your false beliefs and impulsive suicidal behaviour.
I would strongly urge you to get some therapy to help you deal with these issues. While all of us here are pro-choice, I think in the future once you gain a more healthy and mature understanding of relationships, you may well find that they are no longer a trigger for such suicidal impulses at all.
