I feel like this world is it's own self-contained experience, which can be scary sometimes. A lot of people phrase it as if "you only have one chance," and to not "fuck it up."
I like to think this is one life of many, with others taking place far from here, removed in time, space, dimension. In that way, I can reframe this life in my mind.
Instead of this being my "one life," it is simply the life I'm living at the moment.
If you knew there were other lives, other "dreams" beyond this one, would you change how you live here? Personally, I would like to get the most out of every single one of them. Every experience I will have/life I will live, no matter if it's one, or if it's a million, will be different. I'm here right now, here in this one! So I will look at the unique flowers, I will eat good food without guilt, I will take my time and I will do away with the perceived successes and materials of this world. I will live this life and explore this world as I please, and only as I please, and I will leave at my own pace.
I am excited to live another life, if I get one, but I am equally content if this is all I get. It's cool to be here sometimes, isn't it? Most of the pleasure I find in living is nowhere near the money, travel, and relationships that people claim it's found. It's in odd little places, like the perception of color, the ability to hear music, the unexplainable emotions that suffocate my chest and throat. There's a weird sort of reverence and value in every little thing I feel. How fantastic and frustrating it is to be able to grieve and celebrate and sob and laugh, all in the same life. The Human Experience is crazy!!
Long story short, maybe this is a dream. But that doesn't change the fact that I am here, and so I will make what I can of it. The fact that it will vanish when I do does nothing but inspire me to enjoy it while I'm able. Maybe some day I will be able to break the containment between lives and move freely. If I can't do that, if it's found that there is nothing else out there, I will simply go to sleep. I'm okay with that. I've had my fun.
