Discussion Is it wrong thst I'm excited for SN to come?

[VolatilePotato]

Like...Idk if it's that I'm manic or splitting on myself or what. But like, for the first time in awhile I actually feel hope. That this will all be over and I can start as a different entity or have my energy transferred somewhere else. Like, I keep thinking about going into nothing. It's comforting. With my luck I'll probably be a bug or something and hopefully get stepped on and start again. It's like, there's endless possibilities for this that don't involve me being me anymore and that is incredibly exciting for me. Either that, or I'm just fucked up. Who knows

 

[Anxiousangel]

I completely understand, I feel like CTB will lead to a whole new me. A rebirth where maybe, just maybe, I don't feel this pain :(.

 

[VolatilePotato]

I completely understand, I feel like CTB will lead to a whole new me. A rebirth where maybe, just maybe I don't feel this pain :(.

I really can't wait..like I keep visualizing it and feeling ready. I think that's a sign. I feel numb towards everything else, but not this.

 

[Anxiousangel]

I really can't wait..like I keep visualizing it and feeling ready. I think that's a sign. I feel numb towards everything else, but not this.

Do you have any methods in mind?

 

[VolatilePotato]

Do you have any methods in mind?

Yeah, just ordered SN actually

 

[devil]

nope it's not wrong, i'm excited for mine too.

 

[Erase.myself]

I don't think it's wrong at all. I can finally order my SN once I get outta this damn hospital. Just got prescribed Zofran as well (lied about nausea). Hopefully I'll get a script transfer to pharmacy once I get discharged from mental hospital. Then I'll just need the SN and I'm good to go find freedom. It's the only thing that I find comfort in.

 

[VolatilePotato]

I don't think it's wrong at all. I can finally order my SN once I get outta this damn hospital. Just got prescribed Zofran as well (lied about nausea). Hopefully I'll get a script transfer to pharmacy once I get discharged from mental hospital. Then I'll just need the SN and I'm good to go find freedom. It's the only thing that I find comfort in.

I'm glad I'm not alone in this. It's bittersweet. I'm sorry you're there too and I hope you find a way out. I didn't get the meto, but I got dramamine lol. And ginger ale. SN is shipped and should be coming this week. I'm gonna be on here more as it gets closer cuz this is the only place I'll actually find support

 

[TAW122]

Not really, the feeling of having an escape (method) is liberating. It is similar to how I felt when I obtained my method over a year ago. It was more of a sigh of relief and calmness, knowing that I can (reliably) make my exit and not have to suffer anymore.

 

[VolatilePotato]

Not really, the feeling of having an escape (method) is liberating. It is similar to how I felt when I obtained my method over a year ago. It was more of a sigh of relief and calmness, knowing that I can (reliably) make my exit and not have to suffer anymore.

That's exactly it. It's a sense of peace and it's been the only thing to bring that peace

 

[waterbottleman]

No I felt a certain sense of peace/closure when I received my SN and meto.

It was a relief when I realized that I can ctb in the way I want to whenever I want now.

 

[Erase.myself]

I'm glad I'm not alone in this. It's bittersweet. I'm sorry you're there too and I hope you find a way out. I didn't get the meto, but I got dramamine lol. And ginger ale. SN is shipped and should be coming this week. I'm gonna be on here more as it gets closer cuz this is the only place I'll actually find support

Thank you for your words of encouragement. I appreciate your support as well. Have you done thorough research on this method? I could be wrong but I do believe that Dramamine may not be a good option? Feel free to correct me if I am wrong. Sending you lots of hugs.

 

[VolatilePotato]

Thank you for your words of encouragement. I appreciate your support as well. Have you done thorough research on this method? I could be wrong but I do believe that Dramamine may not be a good option? Feel free to correct me if I am wrong. Sending you lots of hugs.

I've read through the resource thread, just not sure how to get the meto

 

[Erase.myself]

I've read through the resource thread, just not sure how to get the meto

I hear ya on that. I tried to get meto yesterday (while in psych ) and he prescribed Zofran instead for nausea and food poison. I just lied and said I had vomiting and headaches. I hope Zofran will do good for my ctb situation. Others have used it I believe.

 

[VolatilePotato]

I hear ya on that. I tried to get meto yesterday (while in psych ) and he prescribed Zofran instead for nausea and food poison. I just lied and said I had vomiting and headaches. I hope Zofran will do good for my ctb situation. Others have used it I believe.

Yeah, I think I saw that as one of the options. Idk if dramamine will do, or if I will get nauseous to begin with. I'm gonna end up taking a bunch of my seroquel before and just before I pass out I'm gonna do the SN. Do a dramamine regimen before hand, fast, and slip into the void

 

[ninja_daryl]

I can hardly wait to escape this nightmare. I'm catching the bus the moment it arrives.