Is it true that sad people often want to make other people smile?

[noname223]

I had this question in mind recently. When I am around other people I am joking a lot. I think if you don't know me personally you could think I am quite an happy guy. But the hell is inside my head. It is weird I want to make other people laugh who are dealing with life way better than me. Normally I should cry my eyes out and cry about my desperation. I think there are many reasons why I don't do that. It is in our society stigmatized. I think I become more and more a resentful, bitter and innerly-alienated person. I don't want that other people notice that. I never wanted to be someone who only complains about life. Someone your friends regret to have met. Though maybe this will happen to my friends after my suicide.

I override the pain. I act as if I was a happy person with a fulfilled life for many. My close friends know my mental torture but they could not hear it anymore this is why I increased the posts in this forum. Sometimes I feel like my behavior resembled the tears of a clown. I can remember the last video footage of Chester Bennington before he ctb. He made his family laugh. Maybe he wanted to be remembered by them in this way.

There is a lot of pain inside myself and I often cope with dark humor. I have elaborated on that in several threads. It is just a weird discrepancy. I make so many jokes with people who don't know my pain. I even made a lot of jokes when I was extremely acute suicidal. It was dark humor, sarcasm and irony. I have made some witty jokes. I wanted to demonstrate with that: At least I can see through the mechanism with completely torture me and destroy myself. At least I can elaborate on that with my logic. Though of course the pain does not disappear by that. And the cherry on top of all of this cynical shit is my suicide. I see no way around it in the future.

Do you think many depressed and suicidal people override their pain by joking to other people? Sometimes it hurts to do that. On the other hand sometimes I try to believe my words and just enjoy the moment.

However I could never become a comedian. This would hurt me too much. I want that at least some people know my real struggle when I am joking with them. When they are aware about for example my suicidality I feel better about it. It is less cynical.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I don't think this is always true, though it can be. Usually though, when I'm feeling sad I have this desire to make other people also feel more sad as if that will override my own sadness but maybe that is why I'm crazy. I don't consider myself funny but sometimes my attempts to bring down the mood are seen that way.

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

More or less. Not necessarily making other people laugh because I'm not in the mood for that, but helping others. It was always something that was part of my personality and, especially now, because I know perfectly well what it's like to be in the shithole, it feels good to help others and not let them fall.

 

[Message In A Bottle]

I am like that, I get joy out of making people smile. Though I have to watch, since I tend to be too much of a clown once I start there's just something about making people happy. I do this mainly with just family though or online.

 

[Catloaf]

Somewhat true in my case. Cracking a good joke and seeing people laughing makes me forget about my own misery for a split second

 

[motel rooms]

I don't consider myself funny but sometimes my attempts to bring down the mood are seen that way.

 

[Lost Magic]

Yes and no. It really all depends on your personality and what you have been through in life.

 

[obafgkm]

Isn't joking, sarcasm, like big bang theory, sitcom, a rather anglo American thing? A way of acting strong, above the situation? I've heard that Russians think only stupid people laugh. They have other ways of acting strong.

When I am sad I find it really annoying to hear people joke or laugh, even when they are not talking to me. I don't want to talk anyway. What can other people do? I don't want other people feel responsible for my decision. But paradoxically I also want to tell them it's not their fault. But joking requires a lot of energy which I don't have when I am sad.

I can feel the social/peer pressure you are subject to, as you said, crying is stigmatized. Many comedians are said to be depressed, like Mr. Beans. They probably spend most energy to act funny outside. Inside they are exhausted.

I don't think this is always true, though it can be. Usually though, when I'm feeling sad I have this desire to make other people also feel more sad as if that will override my own sadness but maybe that is why I'm crazy. I don't consider myself funny but sometimes my attempts to bring down the mood are seen that way.

Yes actually we all like to see other people fail. If you tell them you are a loser, how bad you do they actually feel good because they can condescend towards you and offer you help. Cracking jokes is an act of defiance.