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Felodese

Felodese

Member
Mar 31, 2024
20
I'm very ambivalent - I want to give up but can't quite give up hope.

In my more hopeful moments I sometimes read or listen to podcasts about how people have revcovered or even been cured of their depression.
But when they tell their story it's almost always a case of "I'm complete cured now - I just have to do these 10 things each day, monitor my thoughts 24/7 and confront any negative thing that pops up, or else my depression will return with a vengence. And I know I'll always be in pain and that sooner or later I will have a new depressive episode, no matter what. But I'm totaly recovered."

These "inspirational stories" just make me more pessimistic. Like there's no point.
Is that what recovery is? Feeling a bit better but constantly fighting to stay that way, and there always being the threat of getting worse again?
Are you really recovered if that's what your life is like?
 
M

Mi Mi

Student
Mar 18, 2024
103
I'm very ambivalent - I want to give up but can't quite give up hope.

In my more hopeful moments I sometimes read or listen to podcasts about how people have revcovered or even been cured of their depression.
But when they tell their story it's almost always a case of "I'm complete cured now - I just have to do these 10 things each day, monitor my thoughts 24/7 and confront any negative thing that pops up, or else my depression will return with a vengence. And I know I'll always be in pain and that sooner or later I will have a new depressive episode, no matter what. But I'm totaly recovered."

These "inspirational stories" just make me more pessimistic. Like there's no point.
Is that what recovery is? Feeling a bit better but constantly fighting to stay that way, and there always being the threat of getting worse again?
Are you really recovered if that's what your life is like?
I personally believe they is no cure
So that makes me think their depression was mild and temporary
Mild and or temporary you can believe you're cured and have higher chances of not relapses
Overall I do believe recovery in any instances is constant
Just like if you were and alcoholic
Or eating disorder
You will for life have to practice and have discipline I'm order to maintain a healthy lifestyle
 
K

Kit1

Enlightened
Oct 24, 2023
1,022
Doctors talk about cancer being in remission which means that there is always a possibility of cancer returning. I feel as though depression is like that - we just never know when it will hit us again and when it does, our world's feel like we are in a parallel world to those who are not in the depths of it. And then for some, it isnjust terminal (but it is the not knowing whether it is terminal because when we are in the throes of depression, often we cannot even hold our head above the water to work out what is happening) - at least, that is how I feel.
 
arnxxx

arnxxx

Member
Mar 8, 2024
79
I read books from the library written by people that recovered. Ive been depressed for 10 months approximately and had a burnout for 2 years before that.

As long as you don't want to CTB you have to deal with life.
The books/podcast can give you tips on how to deal with it. Nobody expects you to do 10 things at the same time. You need to practice and be patient.

Are there times in the day you feel better? I feel better in the evening. I can look forward to that.
 
L

LaVieEnRose

Illuminated
Jul 23, 2022
3,282
Yes. It wasn't the aptest name for the process when it comes to mental health.
 
AnxietyHangover

AnxietyHangover

Global Moderator
Aug 20, 2022
203
I'm talking only for myself now, but I think it's nearly impossible to 100% recover. There will be the memories of the times when you were at your lowest and I believe these are hard to forget. There will always be reminders.
 
ForgottenAgain

ForgottenAgain

On the rollercoaster of sadness
Oct 17, 2023
445
I'm in a similar point as you, wondering if recovery is a constant battle of not falling back into depression. I'm really hoping it isn't otherwise I don't know how I will cope...

I have been content in the not so long past. A time when I was exercising regularly, eating well, proud of myself at my job, but then the world just started crumbling down as it usually does. I can say that I felt normal, even though it was just for some months. I didn't feel like I had to fight to be recovered, it felt like I was doing things with ease, or at least with the same difficulty as a normal person.

I want to believe being recovered is like that, just that it lasts longer. I truly hope it is like that.
 
Felodese

Felodese

Member
Mar 31, 2024
20
Are there times in the day you feel better? I feel better in the evening. I can look forward to that.
Unfortunatly not. I used to look forward to going to bed and sleeping, but nowadays I tend to wake up to mild panic attack at 3 or 4 am :/
I'm in a similar point as you, wondering if recovery is a constant battle of not falling back into depression. I'm really hoping it isn't otherwise I don't know how I will cope...

I have been content in the not so long past. A time when I was exercising regularly, eating well, proud of myself at my job, but then the world just started crumbling down as it usually does. I can say that I felt normal, even though it was just for some months. I didn't feel like I had to fight to be recovered, it felt like I was doing things with ease, or at least with the same difficulty as a normal person.

I want to believe being recovered is like that, just that it lasts longer. I truly hope it is like that.
I've been depressed for so long now that I can't really remember what normal acctually felt like. The closest I've come to feeling what you describe is when I got ketamine treatment - things felt better, if not acctually good. But it didn't last very long.
Yes. It wasn't the aptest name for the process when it comes to mental health.
Guess "constant warfare against your broken mind" doesn't sell many self-help books...
 
Last edited:
RosesFlourish

RosesFlourish

There’s a chance I could make it
Feb 16, 2024
55
If most of the time we're happy, then it's worth fighting through the bad times. Unfortunately, a cure usually isn't a realistic goal. But a good quality of life is possible, and that's enough I think.
 
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Unicr0n

Unicr0n

Stuck in a black hole...
Mar 26, 2024
199
I see recovery from depression as no different from fighting to be a better person. I was an absolute monster to other people when I was younger. Mean, nasty, and cruel. I cared about no one but myself. It took me in my early twenties to realise that I was the problem. But changing my bad behaviour was incredibly difficult. It was much easier to continue to be nasty instead of fighting to become a more positive, less toxic individual. Many times it was one step forward, two steps back. Even today, sometimes it's so tempting to fall back into those negative habits. it's sooooo much easier to be negative than positive, so much easier to give up instead of fighting. Just like it's so much easier to just kill yourself instead of fighting for yourself. Easier to be negative than positive.

Depression is the same thing. As you learn better coping mechanisms, it becomes easier and easier to not react as though the world is falling out from under your feet. But some obstacles are so huge, so sudden, that it's tempting to fall back into sorrow. Sometimes the depression is a sea and it feels like there's no way out. If you don't have workable coping mechanisms, the only option you'll find is to drown.

Situational depression is different from genetic depression. Genetic depression is harder to work out of because it's a polygenetic factor, so there's multiple forces making it harder for you that come from within.
 
Z

zeecen

Member
Mar 30, 2024
35
Recovery is a life long thing. It's not just a handful of steps and anyone who represents it as such is not to be trusted. Getting help through online resources is great, but a lot are less than helpful. Not everyone's experience is going to be 100% replicable even if their symptoms and backgrounds are the same.

For some people it is as easy as making a few lifestyle changes but for other's that's not enough or simply not an option. I've been in treatment since I was 6 for bipolar and other issues and still go to therapy today. It can be a very long road and I still need to apply everything I've learned every day to stay in a positive headspace, but my quality of life has improved drastically with professional treatment, whether that's therapy or medication. I also use some legal alternatives which I do not advocate anyone do unless they exhaust all professional options like I have.
 
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Smaragdine

Smaragdine

Member
Mar 31, 2024
55
Unfortunantly, Recovery is constant fighting. Thats why I don't do it :3
Maybe what in our culture is labeled as Depression is the emotional and physical consequence of an insight. And with fighting depression one would have to fight the insight of which the depression is only an expression of. I think Kafka said something to that extent.
 
ScroogeMcDeath

ScroogeMcDeath

Member
Mar 28, 2024
11
I always try to express this to people, but they never had any sufficient response. "That's just life" is the most common and probably my least favorite. Yeah, that's life, that's the problem. It's very demanding. It's too much work. And it's like that for everybody... So imagine how it will be if you are "in recovery"... Twice the demand. Twice the work. For half of the results?

I don't get it. I remember watching a video of some guy talk about how it's like going up a mountain... How it's a winding road that feels circuitous but eventually you reach the peak. And then he goes, "I still occasionally have thoughts of unaliving, I still sometimes get depressed"... And I was just like, "excuse me, what?"... What's the point? To know that recovery demands all this work on top of the regular pile of work that is already demanded, only to still have "episodes"... It's absolutely wild to me. I just don't get it at all. I'm not enthused about "getting better" at all.
 
atdusk

atdusk

Member
Feb 12, 2024
11
I think recovery is finding a reason that gives sense to that effort. I mean, life will su#$k in some way or another, maybe 10% of the time or 90% of the time, but always to some degree, even if you're perfectly sane. When you have a purpose, you can take comfort in the fact that this is only a part of your life, and not the most important one. The problem comes when you haven't, when you lose it or when you start to think it's out of reach.
 
EternalShore

EternalShore

Hardworking Lass who Dreams of Love~ 💕✨
Jun 9, 2023
702
yeahhhh, I'd avoid stuff about people talking about how they got better! >_< It just makes me depressed, jealous, and even more sewer slidal! >_<
Anyways, I would say there's always a threat of things getting worse again~ Especially if your situation changes for the worse~ The important thing to recovery is that it is feeling better while staying alive~ and yes, people can become fully recovered should their whole mindset on life change (so worsening situations no longer depress them), but I wouldn't aim for that tbh~
 
arnxxx

arnxxx

Member
Mar 8, 2024
79
Unfortunatly not. I used to look forward to going to bed and sleeping, but nowadays I tend to wake up to mild panic attack at 3 or 4 am :/

I've been depressed for so long now that I can't really remember what normal acctually felt like. The closest I've come to feeling what you describe is when I got ketamine treatment - things felt better, if not acctually good. But it didn't last very long.

Guess "constant warfare against your broken mind" doesn't sell many self-help books...
Can't you go back to the ketamine treatment?
 
Felodese

Felodese

Member
Mar 31, 2024
20
Unfortunatly not. Because there are toxicity issues, they'll only let you get that treatment once a year. Which sucks...
 
divinemistress36

divinemistress36

Enlightened
Jan 1, 2024
1,303
They had situational depression. Genetic depression is for life
 

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