Venting Is It Really That Hard To Find Emotional Support?

[socrates]

I was talking to someone on a dating app. Turns out they were crazy. So I deleted the app. Now I'm a little worried he's gonna come find me. He said he was violent. We'd only been talking since this morning. I deleted the account.

Anyway I Dmed one of my friends for comfort. But all she wanted to do is talk about her problems. Granted it's not the best time, but still. I have some new friends too, but it's too early to trauma dump on them. And now here I am on a suicide forum looking for support and wondering if my safest bet is to CTB. I swear my list of reasons to go grows each day.

 

[FuneralCry]

I just believe that after all other people cannot be trusted and relied on, sadly so many people are too self centred to ever care and very often people just create even more suffering, I would always personally prefer to avoid other people.

 

[StolenLife]

Did you reveal any personal details to that person, like home address or a phone number? Do you know them in real life? If not then you should be safe, although I understand your fear. If there were no meaningful conversations they will probably forget about you in a few days.
I'm sorry that your friend wasn't supportive. Unfortunately people are selfish. This community is very supportive so you can always vent here.

 

[CarambaAlbum]

I was talking to someone on a dating app. Turns out they were crazy. So I deleted the app. Now I'm a little worried he's gonna come find me. He said he was violent. We'd only been talking since this morning. I deleted the account.

Anyway I Dmed one of my friends for comfort. But all she wanted to do is talk about her problems. Granted it's not the best time, but still. I have some new friends too, but it's too early to trauma dump on them. And now here I am on a suicide forum looking for support and wondering if my safest bet is to CTB. I swear my list of reasons to go grows each day.

We are selfish beasts, you can only rely on yourself for comfort. Everyone else is a snake and/or demon.

 

[socrates]

Did you reveal any personal details to that person, like home address or a phone number? Do you know them in real life? If not then you should be safe, although I understand your fear. If there were no meaningful conversations they will probably forget about you in a few days.
I'm sorry that your friend wasn't supportive. Unfortunately people are selfish. This community is very supportive so you can always vent here.

They didn't even know my real first name, but they saw my photo and they know my age, and they may or may not know my state.

 

[befree]

I think the biggest problem are smartphones and (anti)social networks. Human contacts and communication are increasingly taking place via (anti)social networks. Many people forget that they are communicating with a human being, not a machine. I prefer to talk to people in person or at least over the phone. But many people are too lazy to meet in person these days. They prefer to text instead of leaving the house.
Smartphones and (anti)social networks make people lonely.

 

[StolenLife]

They didn't even know my real first name, but they saw my photo and they know my age, and they may or may not know my state.

Well, the worst that could happen is that they reverse search your photo and it links them to your social media. But you could always simply block them if that happens, right? Age and state aren't that much of a problem since I doubt that the person could find you just from that information. Even if they are violent, I doubt that they would go on a detective like search for someone who they had surface level conversations with on a dating site once without even knowing a full name.
If I were you I'd try to relax (easier said than done I know) and distract myself with something. Everything will be better tomorrow morning. I support your choice to ctb but in my honest opinion that violent scum isn't worth it, and I'd rather wait for how the situation occurs and then, based on events, make a choice whether to ctb or not.

 

[_Alfarooq_]

I was talking to someone on a dating app. Turns out they were crazy. So I deleted the app. Now I'm a little worried he's gonna come find me. He said he was violent. We'd only been talking since this morning. I deleted the account.

Anyway I Dmed one of my friends for comfort. But all she wanted to do is talk about her problems. Granted it's not the best time, but still. I have some new friends too, but it's too early to trauma dump on them. And now here I am on a suicide forum looking for support and wondering if my safest bet is to CTB. I swear my list of reasons to go grows each day.

Same, the last time I had any emotional support was 10 years ago.

 

[fxndi]

If you dont have too much personal info online then you will most likely be safe

 

[tiredplant777]

It is really hard imo. When I get emotional support 98% of the time it is because I am paying for it with money. It depends. My friend reached out to me but again it was all about her, she is going through a lot, but I have been suggesting support groups and the free mental health resources that her city actually has a lot of for a while now, but she doesn't do it. None of my friends have been able to handle my own trauma, and yes I am careful and ask for consent before talking about it. So yeah I do not totally see the point in sticking around bc of it.

 

[SexyIncél]

Yeah, most can't do this well. Requires practice; and many minds are destroyed by pointless overwork

And if your cognition's smashed, people will get frustrated by your endless litany of problems. Even worse, people internalize some sort of stoicism that resigns them to dull & abuse-ridden lives

Some tactics:

• rotate friends, so each carries my weight only briefly
• make it amusing: philosophical rants, comedy & such
• go into it with an attitude of problem-solving my own problems (this is of course can't be done if my cognition's utterly smashed)
• help each more than they help me

Anxiety-ridden people, stuck in ruminations & unable to control their urges, are kinda fucked. Their 'friends' will be aggressive, for example: "If you don't do as I say, I'll no longer talk with you. For your own good". Resulting in them lying their asses off. With often much work to keep reality seem consistent with the lies

 

[Badatlove]

Feel you so much on this. Almost no close friend left. A lot of trauma want to just talk talk talk. Went to the doctor and only help i got is for addiction. Thats focus om behavior.. not deep talk shit like you missed all your life from your parents.