Is it really having the choice to back-out that you're afraid of?

[Pain In The Ass]

Is it really pain and panic you're afraid of, in relation to choosing a method, or is it having the choice to actually back out WHEN you panic?

Choosing a method where, once you have executed the procedure, there is NO option to back out, despite the pain or panic that may arise, seems to me to be the most obvious and reliable choice.

What does it matter how much pain and panic you're experiencing, if you are definitely going to die?

I know it's easier said that done, but if you remove the choice to back out, you have probably removed the thing you were most afraid of; actually backing out!

Once you're drowning at night out at sea after taking 100 benzos and a litre of vodka and popping your inflatable dingy with a knife, or full-hanging off a pylon in a field in the middle of nowhere at 3 am immediately after drinking SN, and there is NO way anyone will save you, what's the problem?! There's nothing you can do about it now, so what do you have to worry about? The worry is gone! You've done it!

Are people more afraid of panicking and alerting hotel staff they have just drank 30mg of SN, or backing out from a partial hang due to the pain, than actually going unconscious and dying?

Is it the choice to stop that they're afraid of? I think it is with me. I plan to CTB in a way where the choice is removed, once I have executed the initial procedure.

 

[°Celsuis_Caesar]

Your unique Philosophical viewpoint has given me inspirational thoughts about CTB instead of fear, Thank you.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Unfortunately, not so much that, but rather SI/guilt which would lead to me backing out. This is why I haven't gone out and ordered the supplies for my designated method and will not until there is no doubt in my mind I can push through my survival instinct and guilt.

The three problems I speculate that prevent people from going through with the act are hope (hope that things can/will get better and/or something positive will happen that will outweigh whatever they are going through), survival instinct (which prevents you from physically going through with the act) and guilt (which prevents you from mentally/emotionally being ready to go through with the act). For me, I am 100% positive that there is no hope for me, but I am not 100% positive that I can push past the SI and guilt, so I unfortunately have to wait a little while longer.

 

[Pain In The Ass]

Unfortunately, not so much that, but rather SI/guilt which would lead to me backing out. This is why I haven't gone out and ordered the supplies for my designated method and will not until there is no doubt in my mind I can push through my survival instinct and guilt.

The three problems I speculate that prevent people from going through with the act are hope (hope that things can/will get better and/or something positive will happen that will outweigh whatever they are going through), survival instinct (which prevents you from physically going through with the act) and guilt (which prevents you from mentally/emotionally being ready to go through with the act). For me, I am 100% positive that there is no hope for me, but I am not 100% positive that I can push past the SI and guilt, so I unfortunately have to wait a little while longer.

This is very informative. I suppose my proposal assumes that you will always feel guilt and SI, so these things need to be ignored, and that the hope is all gone, there is no unexpected opportunity that will come along and allow life to be tolerated, all options have been exhausted, and it's definitely CTB that is the only reasonable option. I think my proposal is to overcome guilt and SI by choosing a method that is inescapable once executed, despite the pain, SI, panic or guilt.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

This is very informative. I suppose my proposal assumes that you will always feel guilt and SI, so these things need to be ignored, and that the hope is all gone, there is no unexpected opportunity that will come along and allow life to be tolerated, all options have been exhausted, and it's definitely CTB that is the only reasonable option. I think my proposal is to overcome guilt and SI by choosing a method that is inescapable once executed, despite the pain, SI, panic or guilt.

All methods have a way to back out. Methods relating to knives will have hesitation wounds, gunshots will be botched, SN you will just call for help, etc. The only surefire way is probably electrocution? But the horror of pain but deters me from doing that.

Yeah, SI and guilt will always be there, but if you're absolutely sure you want to go through with it and you're suffering is too unbearable, they will seem nonexistent in my opinion.

 

[Pain In The Ass]

All methods have a way to back out. Methods relating to knives will have hesitation wounds, gunshots will be botched, SN you will just call for help, etc. The only surefire way is probably electrocution? But the horror of pain but deters me from doing that.

Yeah, SI and guilt will always be there, but if you're absolutely sure you want to go through with it and you're suffering is too unbearable, they will seem nonexistent in my opinion.

Assuming you begin the procedure, some methods are inescapable. Full Suspension hanging is inescapable, if done properly, away from anything you can grab onto, and away from people who can hear you. Drink some SN moments before you hang, just for security. This all assumes you will execute the first drop. Obviously, people can back out of the first step of the procedure. But I mean, once that is executed, any sudden feeling of 'oh my god, I don't want this' is irrelevant with some methods. I will go with those methods!

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Assuming you begin the procedure, some methods are inescapable. Full Suspension hanging is inescapable, if done properly, away from anything you can grab onto, and away from people who can hear you. Drink some SN moments before you hang, just for security. This all assumes you will execute the first drop. Obviously, people can back out of the first step of the procedure. But I mean, once that is executed, any sudden feeling of 'oh my god, I don't want this' is irrelevant with some methods. I will go with those methods!

I suppose you are right. Also, depends if you are able to properly suspend yourself. Then again, hanging is not a method I would willingly choose.

 

[outrider567]

Is it really pain and panic you're afraid of, in relation to choosing a method, or is it having the choice to actually back out WHEN you panic?

Choosing a method where, once you have executed the procedure, there is NO option to back out, despite the pain or panic that may arise, seems to me to be the most obvious and reliable choice.

What does it matter how much pain and panic you're experiencing, if you are definitely going to die?

I know it's easier said that done, but if you remove the choice to back out, you have probably removed the thing you were most afraid of; actually backing out!

Once you're drowning at night out at sea after taking 100 benzos and a litre of vodka and popping your inflatable dingy with a knife, or full-hanging off a pylon in a field in the middle of nowhere at 3 am immediately after drinking SN, and there is NO way anyone will save you, what's the problem?! There's nothing you can do about it now, so what do you have to worry about? The worry is gone! You've done it!

Are people more afraid of panicking and alerting hotel staff they have just drank 30mg of SN, or backing out from a partial hang due to the pain, than actually going unconscious and dying?

Is it the choice to stop that they're afraid of? I think it is with me. I plan to CTB in a way where the choice is removed, once I have executed the initial procedure.

Nitrogen takes care of any panic

Unfortunately, not so much that, but rather SI/guilt which would lead to me backing out. This is why I haven't gone out and ordered the supplies for my designated method and will not until there is no doubt in my mind I can push through my survival instinct and guilt.

The three problems I speculate that prevent people from going through with the act are hope (hope that things can/will get better and/or something positive will happen that will outweigh whatever they are going through), survival instinct (which prevents you from physically going through with the act) and guilt (which prevents you from mentally/emotionally being ready to go through with the act). For me, I am 100% positive that there is no hope for me, but I am not 100% positive that I can push past the SI and guilt, so I unfortunately have to wait a little while longer.

Yes, well said--Those are three problems for many but not for me at the moment--I don't see things getting better, each morning I wake up,like I just did,and shake off my intense dreams and realize she's still gone--SI is not a problem that I foresee--and I possess zero guilt, since there are almost no family members left

 

[AreWeWinning]

Is it really pain and panic you're afraid of, in relation to choosing a method, or is it having the choice to actually back out WHEN you panic?

Choosing a method where, once you have executed the procedure, there is NO option to back out, despite the pain or panic that may arise, seems to me to be the most obvious and reliable choice.

What does it matter how much pain and panic you're experiencing, if you are definitely going to die?

I know it's easier said that done, but if you remove the choice to back out, you have probably removed the thing you were most afraid of; actually backing out!

Once you're drowning at night out at sea after taking 100 benzos and a litre of vodka and popping your inflatable dingy with a knife, or full-hanging off a pylon in a field in the middle of nowhere at 3 am immediately after drinking SN, and there is NO way anyone will save you, what's the problem?! There's nothing you can do about it now, so what do you have to worry about? The worry is gone! You've done it!

Are people more afraid of panicking and alerting hotel staff they have just drank 30mg of SN, or backing out from a partial hang due to the pain, than actually going unconscious and dying?

Is it the choice to stop that they're afraid of? I think it is with me. I plan to CTB in a way where the choice is removed, once I have executed the initial procedure.

I think people who are not serious about their attempts, either consciously or subconsciously, are afraid of the pain and panic, and not afraid of being able to back out.

And people, who want 100% certainty of success, are not afraid of the pain and panic, and afraid of being able to back out. Or they are afraid of both, but afraid of being able to back out more than the pain.

Speaking for myself, I'm not sure whether I'll do it, but if I finally decide to do it, I want to be 100% sure I succeed. Hence, my method of choice is full suspension hanging. Not necessarily a big drop, but I want my legs to be in the air.

I don't get the people who are afraid of the pain, and I agree that it doesn't matter. Think about what you are about to do, and what it means for the people around you. You are going to kill yourself. The pain just doesn't compare to the severity of the act. Having said that, I'm afraid of the pain too, but my fear of a failed attempt is greater.

I understand that it's not easy. I said I don't get it, but a little bit I do. I understand there are people who are suffering, and want to do it, but they just lack the courage. Maybe I'm in that category too, since I haven't done it yet. Also, I think it's such a personal thing. Like I'm less afraid of hanging, but more afraid of drowning. Some people may be the opposite. Or some people may have a higher chance of success with a method that they can back out of, because that is a method that they are willing to try. Technically, their chance of success is still higher than if they had superior method that they are too afraid to do. And I'm not any better with my superior method, if I'm not actually doing it. I don't know...

I think my point is that I either want to go for 100% certainty, or not try it at all, because my biggest fear is a failed attempt. I don't want to be a suicide survivor, because I'm too proud for that. And the worst of worst is a failed attempt that leaves me mentally or physically disabled.

 

[FuneralCry]

I think that for me, what I am afraid of is the method failing in some way. That is what holds me back. I think if it was guaranteed that the method would succeed it would make ctb easier for me. Even know we want to die, all humans are programmed to survive which can make ctb very difficult. I just wish that I could peacefully pass away in my sleep without having to go through the whole process of ctb.

 

[watchingthewheels]

Is it really pain and panic you're afraid of, in relation to choosing a method, or is it having the choice to actually back out WHEN you panic?

Choosing a method where, once you have executed the procedure, there is NO option to back out, despite the pain or panic that may arise, seems to me to be the most obvious and reliable choice.

What does it matter how much pain and panic you're experiencing, if you are definitely going to die?

I know it's easier said that done, but if you remove the choice to back out, you have probably removed the thing you were most afraid of; actually backing out!

Once you're drowning at night out at sea after taking 100 benzos and a litre of vodka and popping your inflatable dingy with a knife, or full-hanging off a pylon in a field in the middle of nowhere at 3 am immediately after drinking SN, and there is NO way anyone will save you, what's the problem?! There's nothing you can do about it now, so what do you have to worry about? The worry is gone! You've done it!

Are people more afraid of panicking and alerting hotel staff they have just drank 30mg of SN, or backing out from a partial hang due to the pain, than actually going unconscious and dying?

Is it the choice to stop that they're afraid of? I think it is with me. I plan to CTB in a way where the choice is removed, once I have executed the initial procedure.

As Paul Gauguin said to Van Gogh, in LUST FOR LIFE:

Vincent Van Gogh : Violence makes me sick. I have too much inside me, I'm afraid of it.

Paul Gauguin : Ah, that's why I let it out before it hurts me.
[takes a drink and snickers]

Paul Gauguin : Last winter in Martinique, I got into a fight with some sailors. I was in the hospital for a month
[chuckles]
Paul Gauguin : ... but it was worth it. Even that piddling brawl out there made me feel better than I have in weeks. And I know why: because suddenly there's something in front of you, something you can hit at. He stands there, you smash his teeth in, or he does it to you - either way it's alright: there's a *decision*.

 

[BigG91]

Is it really pain and panic you're afraid of, in relation to choosing a method, or is it having the choice to actually back out WHEN you panic?

Choosing a method where, once you have executed the procedure, there is NO option to back out, despite the pain or panic that may arise, seems to me to be the most obvious and reliable choice.

What does it matter how much pain and panic you're experiencing, if you are definitely going to die?

I know it's easier said that done, but if you remove the choice to back out, you have probably removed the thing you were most afraid of; actually backing out!

Once you're drowning at night out at sea after taking 100 benzos and a litre of vodka and popping your inflatable dingy with a knife, or full-hanging off a pylon in a field in the middle of nowhere at 3 am immediately after drinking SN, and there is NO way anyone will save you, what's the problem?! There's nothing you can do about it now, so what do you have to worry about? The worry is gone! You've done it!

Are people more afraid of panicking and alerting hotel staff they have just drank 30mg of SN, or backing out from a partial hang due to the pain, than actually going unconscious and dying?

Is it the choice to stop that they're afraid of? I think it is with me. I plan to CTB in a way where the choice is removed, once I have executed the initial procedure.

With me it's more of fear of failing than dying. Maybe it's because i don't live alone.

 

[Pain In The Ass]

I think my point is that I either want to go for 100% certainty, or not try it at all, because my biggest fear is a failed attempt. I don't want to be a suicide survivor, because I'm too proud for that. And the worst of worst is a failed attempt that leaves me mentally or physically disabled.

I think that for me, what I am afraid of is the method failing in some way.

With me it's more of fear of failing than dying

I agree with all of these statements. I want to make sure it's the last thing I ever do. If I die whilst in pain, and whilst panicking, that's all fine, as long I fall unconscious fairly quickly, and it 100% works, so that there is no moment afterwards when I am alive to remember it and reflect upon it, in some kind of traumatized state of PTSD, and even more afraid of trying again.