Venting Is compassion weakness?

[WrongPlaceWrongTime]

For all my talk to myself that I would have to accept compromises to die, I cannot fully accept the pain it would cause my family members. Even the one that irritates me the most, I have second thoughts about it. She irritates me a lot, but by sheer stupidity rather than out of malice. I feel pretty weak.

 

[waitingforrest]

I feel like compassion is a double-edged sword. Being completely emotionless and alone will make me miserable and caring to much will as well.

It is thoughts like these that make me second guess ctb. That tiny hope that it will all be okay even though it won't happen.

 

[natali4]

This is definitely the main reason I am not able to ctb. We can just convince ourselves that compassion and empathy make us good. I see people without compassion living a good life all the time. Who knows what makes us weak or strong, good or bad.

 

[whatevs]

This is definitely the main reason I am not able to ctb. We can just convince ourselves that compassion and empathy make us good. I see people without compassion living a good life all the time. Who knows what makes us weak or strong, good or bad.

Strength is quite straightforward, is about resilience. Compassion makes you weaker if you take it without context, however, a compassionate person is more likely to obtain support and defense from a social network, so it balances out.

Good and bad are completely subjective to the point that for the lion is good devouring a zebra but for the zebra is bad to be devoured by a lion.

 

[nullpointer]

It's a little bit solipsistic but the way I see it is that I'm going to do right by the people I care about and the disadvantaged while I'm here. But just as life doesn't owe me anything, I don't owe it anything. It is tough to lose someone to suicide. I experienced a close loss last year, a friend who also had BPD (and also drove the same sports car as me, in the same color, weird coincidence). My feelings are mixed. I miss him, but I also understand wanting to stop experiencing that acute suffering, and part of me is happy he's not suffering anymore. If everyone could grasp that latter bit, this forum wouldn't get vilified the way it does. Taking time to empathize with and understand others is not the same thing as inciting/encouraging but it's like this forums dissidents see it exclusively that way. Ugh I am ranty tonight I'm so sorry everyone

 

[Al_stargate]

People perceive kindness and compassion as a weakness, unfortunately. Being kind, I has so many bad experiences that I stopped showing any kind of kindness on the outside. Often someone is kind just to feel better about themselves, it's not real. Anyway, I am kind and compassionate but rather not show it in a way of attitude because it will be misinterpreted but show it in a way of action.

 

[GentleJerk]

True compassion acknowledges the suffering and the needs of others rather than only one's own, it goes against the powerful impulse of self interest and takes great strength.

But there are different modes of compassion, just like there are different modes of charity toward others. Giving your car keys to a drunk driver is charity in the mode of ignorance. Learning how to have great compassion for others in a way that is beneficial for both parties, can be difficult I think.

Don't mistake your compassion for weakness.