I'm not particularly disturbed by it, but I can't really fathom what it's like to enjoy it. All my destructive urges get directed toward wanting to hurt other people or end myself.
i used to cut but not very deep. i cant really explain it but it helped me calm down. i suppose its the one time i have control over something. The blood is also steady and it somehow soothes me. still…i cant look at fresh ones by others. it urks me. Especially when they penetrate it really deep. ill start feeling nauseous.
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