Discussion Intrusive morbid thoughts?

[chlorine]

I'm sure many people experience these. I sometimes wonder why our minds get so twisted to think such grotesque things regarding ourselves or other people. For example, I would be in bed just doing nothing and having weird thoughts, images or videos looping out of the blue of me doing things like butchering myself, cutting myself into pieces, cooking myself, taking my eyeballs off and eating them, being burnt alive and stuff like that. It's not like I want to actually do these things (though sometimes I will loop things and want to actually do them, like cutting etc), but they just appear out of nowhere and can be disturbing sometimes. Sometimes they will be around other people, I don't want to hurt or kill nobody but sometimes I just fantasize about it in a weird way. Like various methods and such.
Or sometimes it will be just paranoia and imagining the worst possible scenarios you'd find yourself in, for me terrorism, fear of being watched/monitored (when I was a kid I thought there was an octopus inside my head making decisions for myself and it terrified me lol) and home invasion works particularly well even though I'm sure it's common. Idk why our minds do this thing. If you want to share any particularly bizarre thought, you're welcomed to do so.

 

[chlorine]

I'm sure many people experience these. I sometimes wonder why our minds get so twisted to think such grotesque things regarding ourselves or other people. For example, I would be in bed just doing nothing and having weird thoughts, images or videos looping out of the blue of me doing things like butchering myself, cutting myself into pieces, cooking myself, taking my eyeballs off and eating them, being burnt alive and stuff like that. It's not like I want to actually do these things (though sometimes I will loop things and want to actually do them, like cutting etc), but they just appear out of nowhere and can be disturbing sometimes. Sometimes they will be around other people, I don't want to hurt or kill nobody but sometimes I just fantasize about it in a weird way. Like various methods and such.
Or sometimes it will be just paranoia and imagining the worst possible scenarios you'd find yourself in, for me terrorism, fear of being watched/monitored (when I was a kid I thought there was an octopus inside my head making decisions for myself and it terrified me lol) and home invasion works particularly well even though I'm sure it's common. Idk why our minds do this thing. If you want to share any particularly bizarre thought, you're welcomed to do so.

Looonely thread.. Maybe I shouldn't have shared such morbid thoughts.. Whoops

 

[Roberto]

Looonely thread.. Maybe I shouldn't have shared such morbid thoughts.. Whoops

I like to think cutting my wrists when I have anxiety. Also hurting myself with a katana, doing harakiri. Sometimes I like to see my brain blow away with a distant sniper. Sometimes I dream to be dead in the bathroom. The words invade my brain. The images also. Sometimes the past. Sometimes what I would like that was it.
You are not alone.
A big hug with lots of love. You are not the only one.

 

[chlorine]

I like to think cutting my wrists when I have anxiety. Also hurting myself with a katana, doing harakiri. Sometimes I like to see my brain blow away with a distant sniper. Sometimes I dream to be dead in the bathroom. The words invade my brain. The images also. Sometimes the past. Sometimes what I would like that was it.
You are not alone.
A big hug with lots of love. You are not the only one.

Thanks a lot for sharing your thoughts, for a moment a though I went too far telling the specific images that I see in these moments, but I guess many people experiences these thoughts, at least to some extent. Wish you the best

 

[wiIIow]

I will try to find a time to write out a response when I'm not feeling so sick, but in short: I do relate, as intrusive disturbing thoughts and images have been a common issue for me during most of my life. Burning alive is a big one, as is the impulse/image of driving into oncoming traffic, a pole, whatever. out of nowhere it will play out in my head and make me flinch while behind the wheel. just the tip of the iceberg here though

 

[Begemont]

Mostly just throwing myself into traffic or stabbing myself with a knife. That's the stuff I get. It's just gotten so common that I barely think anything about it. See a knife? Get a visual of throwing myself into it. Same with seeing cars outside. In some ways I'm afraid I'll act on that stuff one day - afraid because of how unlikely it is that it will work but I guess when it gets really out of hand that won't matter.

 

[chlorine]

Mostly just throwing myself into traffic or stabbing myself with a knife. That's the stuff I get. It's just gotten so common that I barely think anything about it. See a knife? Get a visual of throwing myself into it. Same with seeing cars outside. In some ways I'm afraid I'll act on that stuff one day - afraid because of how unlikely it is that it will work but I guess when it gets really out of hand that won't matter.

Yeah me too. As soon as I see something potentially dangerous I imagine myself in these scenarios, like tall buildings, bridges, knives, ropes, stuff like that.

 

[JustLosingMyself]

+1 I visualise harming myself very often. Not quite as violent but close

 

[Ruffian]

I get intrusive thoughts that are really disturbing, but they don't necessarily involve me hurting myself. I really can't share them comfortably, but I would just let you know they are disturbing to the point where I can't sit still. If I am at work I will have to get up and walk around. I do have recurring thoughts of self harm, and they usually involve cutting myself in someway. Please don't feel alone in this, I'm sure many of us can sympathize. Are you open to speaking to a counselor about your thoughts? That may help, but it could take up a lot of time for you to trust someone to tell them. It's easier here, because we all share a common ground. Telling someone in person might be scary, but maybe it would help you?

 

[Divine Trinity]

I'm sure many people experience these. I sometimes wonder why our minds get so twisted to think such grotesque things regarding ourselves or other people. For example, I would be in bed just doing nothing and having weird thoughts, images or videos looping out of the blue of me doing things like butchering myself, cutting myself into pieces, cooking myself, taking my eyeballs off and eating them, being burnt alive and stuff like that. It's not like I want to actually do these things (though sometimes I will loop things and want to actually do them, like cutting etc), but they just appear out of nowhere and can be disturbing sometimes. Sometimes they will be around other people, I don't want to hurt or kill nobody but sometimes I just fantasize about it in a weird way. Like various methods and such.
Or sometimes it will be just paranoia and imagining the worst possible scenarios you'd find yourself in, for me terrorism, fear of being watched/monitored (when I was a kid I thought there was an octopus inside my head making decisions for myself and it terrified me lol) and home invasion works particularly well even though I'm sure it's common. Idk why our minds do this thing. If you want to share any particularly bizarre thought, you're welcomed to do so.

Massive propaganda industry + Fear mongering culture + stress + commonplace institutional conspiracies = ???

You're not wrong about the being watched part, everything message, account, time log on this site is sitting inside some storage facility in Utah...

 

[chlorine]

I get intrusive thoughts that are really disturbing, but they don't necessarily involve me hurting myself. I really can't share them comfortably, but I would just let you know they are disturbing to the point where I can't sit still. If I am at work I will have to get up and walk around. I do have recurring thoughts of self harm, and they usually involve cutting myself in someway. Please don't feel alone in this, I'm sure many of us can sympathize. Are you open to speaking to a counselor about your thoughts? That may help, but it could take up a lot of time for you to trust someone to tell them. It's easier here, because we all share a common ground. Telling someone in person might be scary, but maybe it would help you?

I haven't really gotten into detail on this particulat topic with my psychiatrist or psychologist, they know i self harm but I don't think I've ever told them about these intrusive thoughts. I don't know how I might react telling them, honestly, but maybe I could try. They only know about the video looping i had before I was hospitalized. I'm sorry you have such disturbing thoughts that you're uncomfortable sharing them, I can only imagine.