Introduce yourself

[No surprises]

Hello everyone, I'm an 18-year-old girl from China. I want to commit suicide because of a severe decline in my memory and language abilities for unknown reasons. If you have the similar problem, please feel free to reach out to me. We might not be able to communicate as smoothly as normal people, but we are in the same situation and share a common understanding, which I think is great.
Other than that, I like listening to Radiohead, Grimes, and Iyowa. I used to love watching movies, writing, and reading, but I haven't written or read in a long time now because I feel unworthy. The only thing that makes me happy is watching movies. My favorite movie is Fight Club, and my favorite book is "Stories of Your Life and Others."

 

[aego]

hello everyone! I am Ego. I mostly lurk/reply to threads so you probably won't see me in the wild.
I'm 19 this year, so im probably one of the youngest members. despite my typing habits, i swear i'm not a troll and actually do take this site seriously.

im here bc ive genuinely been depressed since I was 10 (hereditary and environmental). I decided to force myself to wait until I was 18 to see if everything would actually get better, and it never did. i am not an ambitious person, nor am i particularly talented at anything besides being nice. i've trying my whole life to fit in and work hard, just to be mediocre and having to watch everyone else drift past me. being anxious/emotionally numbed and unable to focus basically just ruined my social/academic life @_@

I made an account because america is actually trash at supporting neurodivergencies/mental illnesses... there is basically no open resources available to committing safely (if it weren't for SaSu i probably would've foolishly tried overdosing on pain meds and permanently screwing myself), so seeing the huge threads on how to safely ctb AND have a normal place to talk abt it was so nice. everyone here is so sweet, so i hope i meet some new friends.

 

[blush]

hi everyone,

i'm an 18yo trans girl located in north america. i'm on this forum bc dysphoria and mental health issues r debilitating and very few people understand me (feels like i am an alien). so i wanna talk to ppl who might understand mental health from their own experiences. cool to meet you!

 

[luchayamor]

Hi! I've been following the site for a while, but only now have I decided to create an account. I'm going through a serious crisis and I need to vent. I feel so stupid.
I'm nothing.
I don't know anything, I don't make a difference in the world.
Nobody likes me because I'm boring, detestable, without qualities. UGLY.
I'm anxious, I talk too much, my hair is falling out.
I need to do better in college, take courses and go to lectures.
I need to keep my report card with high grades, I need to read and take notes on everything. I need to dress well, take care of myself, have my bangs done.
But I don't know how to do any of that, I just fail.
I'm tired. I just cry. Incompetent.
I try and fail and I get rejected.
I haven't been able to make friends or have a committed partner by my side. I've been rejected by many boys, I've gone through anorexia, and now I've been dealing with depression for years.
Even my cat doesn't want me anymore; he stopped coming into my room because I'm so detestable.
I'd rather just die.
I don't go to the gym, I have no personality, no hobbies, I am NOTHING. I still watch the news about the world and I'm completely desolate.

 

[aego]

hi everyone,

i'm an 18yo trans girl located in north america. i'm on this forum bc dysphoria and mental health issues r debilitating and very few people understand me (feels like i am an alien). so i wanna talk to ppl who might understand mental health from their own experiences. cool to meet you!

hiii! i'm also from NA and yeah— once i got out of highschool i realized there's actually like 0 other trans people around me

 

[ACorpseHeldUp]

Hi. I'm ACorpseHeldUp, I'm a man in my mid 30's in the Netherlands. My health has been getting worse the past years, but on top of that I'm now suffering from an illness (mold illness/sensitivity) that isn't acknowledged in my country, resulting in mental health institutions labeling me as delusional and trying to help me in ways that make me worse. It's getting worse and the path to getting better is very uncertain so I hope I can find a way to end it all soon in case I can't get better. Unfortunately I don't have high hopes...

 

[K14~♡]

Hi! I'm a 1st yr accountancy student from the Philippines and I rlly wanna escape this course and my uni...(Family pressured me to pick this) I wonder if there's any Pipinos here?
I'm in this site cuz I was searching on methods, and wanted a place where I can freely talk about suicide. I felt happy when I discovered this site btw! It felt like I finally found where I belonged haha

Not sure what else to mention about myself, but I wanna say that I love Where Winds Meet (a chinese mmorpg) and Sleep Token

 

[sadpeaceful_snorlax]

Hello! Not really sure what to share
I like Pokemon, I like making people laugh, and toasted sandwiches are sooo good (the broiler is such an amazing invention!) I've dealt with depression and suicidal for a good while, I was learning good tools to deal with them and felt better than I had felt in a long time, but I'm back to a really low point, which felt oddly comforting to a certain degree, and don't feel like getting better again
:) thank you for reading

 

[i_am_done]

Hi! I'm 29, almost 30 which is hard to believe. From the US. I've been depressed since around age 14 and wasted my early 20s drinking alone. I haven't been able to bounce back. I haven't finished my college degree and I live with my parents. If you're reading this and I haven't killed myself yet it's because I still have a faint glimmer of hope that things will get better. The future is just getting harder and harder to believe in. So I found myself here, and am finding solace in the fact that there are like-minded folks.

 

[whywere]

Welcome!

Great to have you here, my new good friend.

This site is so kind, caring with so much empathy, just wonderful!

Walter

 

[Kai64]

Hello everyone, i prefer to be called 'Kai', i am an 19 year old boy from Brazil, i have autism.

My departing day is in 2 months (it will be on Late May, just a few days before the end of the month), i already made my mind, people tried changing my mind but i just can't kick this off me. I may explain my reasons in the suicide topic later. I wanna use this website as some kind of personal public diary for me.

Btw, i took a long time to find this website again haha, the searches from google, duckduckgo and even startpage refused to show it to me. I had to ask FreedomAI for the link hehe

Anyway, i see people here seem really chill, so i believe my stay here will be nice until the day i will commit suicide haha

 

[Luvwww.com]

Hey guys,

Noticed a lot of threads pop up with new members saying hey. To reduce clutter we have decided to make a welcome thread for everyone new to introduce themselves and for people to welcome them, basically merging all future welcome posts into this one.

With that said, welcome to Sanctioned Suicide, we're a pro-choice forum; make sure to read the rules and check the resource sticky out too!

Post your introductions here!

I don't matter, am worthless, will never be visible to others. I'm the 3rd person in my own story, I am separate.

Hey guys,

Noticed a lot of threads pop up with new members saying hey. To reduce clutter we have decided to make a welcome thread for everyone new to introduce themselves and for people to welcome them, basically merging all future welcome posts into this one.

With that said, welcome to Sanctioned Suicide, we're a pro-choice forum; make sure to read the rules and check the resource sticky out too!

Post your introductions here!

Confusion in her eyes that says it all
She's lost control
And she's clinging to the nearest passerby
She's lost control
And she gave away the secrets of her past
And said, "I've lost control again"
And to the voice that told her when and where to act
She said, "I've lost control again"
And she turned around and took me by the hand
And said, "I've lost control again"
And how I'll never know just why or understand
She said, "I've lost control again"
And she screamed out, kicking on her side, and said
"I've lost control again"
And seized up on the floor, I thought she'd die
She said, "I've lost control"
She's lost control again
She's lost control
She's lost control again
She's lost control
That I had to phone her friend to state my case
And say she's lost control again
And she showed up all the errors and mistakes
And said, "I've lost control again"
And she expressed herself in many different ways
Until she lost control again
And walked upon the edge of no escape
And laughed, "I've lost control"
She's lost control again
She's lost control
She's lost control again
She's lost control

Hello everyone, I'm an 18-year-old girl from China. I want to commit suicide because of a severe decline in my memory and language abilities for unknown reasons. If you have the similar problem, please feel free to reach out to me. We might not be able to communicate as smoothly as normal people, but we are in the same situation and share a common understanding, which I think is great.
Other than that, I like listening to Radiohead, Grimes, and Iyowa. I used to love watching movies, writing, and reading, but I haven't written or read in a long time now because I feel unworthy. The only thing that makes me happy is watching movies. My favorite movie is Fight Club, and my favorite book is "Stories of Your Life and Others."

I'm lost at sea
Don't bother me
I've lost my way
I've lost my way

Living in a Fantasy world....



I also wanna kill myself due to similar reasons. I used to be smart at one point, I don't know if my depression made me dumb or my dumbness made me depressed, my memories are all mashed up together. I wanted to be capable, to feel emotions richly, have a lot of friends and a loving girlfriend, atleast that's what it would take for me to not kill myself. None of those things will happen.

I have faded into the background in my own life.

And one day
I am gonna grow wings
a chemical reaction

Hysterical and useless
Hysterical and useless

 

[DecayAndAsh]

I'm Emily. I'm a 26yo trans woman from the southeastern US. I only started getting serious about suicide in the last few years, but I've considered it an option as long as I can remember. I don't know for sure if I'm gonna ctb yet, but I'm nearing the end of my rope. This was originally supposed to be a lurker account and my username received very little effort. It's uh... not great lol.

I mostly listen to metal (I've been on an Ice Nine Kills kick lately). I play video games occasionally, but I find I enjoy touching grass more now that I have IRL friends. I'm developing as a competition shooter. I'm mainly in it for the fun and social time, but I am getting better.

 

[Passenger4224]

Would have made a post here earlier but didn't see this thread until now lol

I'm a 21 yro American male determined to CTB by my birthday. Being the born the way I am is non-negotiable to me and I hate being worse than everyone else at everything. I needed extra help ever since I was an infant. Struggled to walk / speak / ride a bike / or any of life's milestones. Aside from being born barely able to function, I'm not even the correct gender so I can't have a relationship (which my happiness depends on).

I'd rather not be alive than be me, and this is the ultimate no-brainer of a decision. Until my day comes, I want to use this forum as a place to speak about suicide without being censored. I've been obsessed with the topic and love discussing and researching it. I always try to view things from a logical standpoint, but I also might come with hot takes and unconventional ideas.

I've enjoyed posting in this forum so far and find this to be a great community! I am open to new online friends, if you can tolerate that I won't be around for long.

 

[No surprises]

I don't matter, am worthless, will never be visible to others. I'm the 3rd person in my own story, I am separate.

Confusion in her eyes that says it all
She's lost control
And she's clinging to the nearest passerby
She's lost control
And she gave away the secrets of her past
And said, "I've lost control again"
And to the voice that told her when and where to act
She said, "I've lost control again"
And she turned around and took me by the hand
And said, "I've lost control again"
And how I'll never know just why or understand
She said, "I've lost control again"
And she screamed out, kicking on her side, and said
"I've lost control again"
And seized up on the floor, I thought she'd die
She said, "I've lost control"
She's lost control again
She's lost control
She's lost control again
She's lost control
That I had to phone her friend to state my case
And say she's lost control again
And she showed up all the errors and mistakes
And said, "I've lost control again"
And she expressed herself in many different ways
Until she lost control again
And walked upon the edge of no escape
And laughed, "I've lost control"
She's lost control again
She's lost control
She's lost control again
She's lost control

I'm lost at sea
Don't bother me
I've lost my way
I've lost my way

Living in a Fantasy world....



I also wanna kill myself due to similar reasons. I used to be smart at one point, I don't know if my depression made me dumb or my dumbness made me depressed, my memories are all mashed up together. I wanted to be capable, to feel emotions richly, have a lot of friends and a loving girlfriend, atleast that's what it would take for me to not kill myself. None of those things will happen.

I have faded into the background in my own life.

And one day
I am gonna grow wings
a chemical reaction

Hysterical and useless
Hysterical and useless

I didn't receive the notification, so I'm only seeing your reply now! You feel that without ideal interpersonal relationships, life loses its meaning. Although I don't quite understand this pursuit, I think that suicide actually demonstrates your persistence in your ideals and meaning. So, you could consider your suicide as a form of self-actualization; that might make you feel a little better. "One day I will grow wings"—I recognized these lyrics from Let Down. This song resonates with the mindset of someone contemplating suicide, which is why I love it so much and have listened to it over 100 times. In May, I'm going to a hospital in a big city to see a doctor about cognitive impairment. I hope this will be a chance for metamorphosis; otherwise, I'll be shaking hands with carbon monoxide, haha.
Please forgive my poor writing skills.

 

[xterii]

hi, 20f from usa

i officially joined recently after a few years of lurking

lover of animals, nature, music, and writing poetry. have silly hyper fixations on ptv, mcr, animal genetics and dinosaurs too

i have suffered from multiple disorders since i was a kid, and have been trying to find a place of comfort and meet new people- hopefully make friends also <3

 

[Anthropos]

Hello, Im 29 y.o, teacher from Brazil and doing a PHD in philosophy. I write classical music and short stories sometimes. Im completely pessimistic about the world, universe, nature, humans and existence, and hope to die soon. Dunno which method Ill use yet, probably jumping from a cellphone tower near my house.

 

[listerical]

hiya.
im 20, from canada. i train dogs, specifically psychiatric service dogs. i love music, especially live. my favourite band is twenty one pilots. favourite game is life is strange: before the storm.

 

[mushi_tamago]

Hello.

I'm 32, AFAB non-binary person, currently residing in Serbia. I used to live in a part of Africa and even though the economy is shit there, I at least had my friends and we all kept each other sane.

I have suffered from depression since I was ~13, due to intermittent domestic violence and ongoing emotional abuse. The DV was a result of the war in this country in the 90s, which forced my parents to leave for Africa and uproot their lives. They never got over it and sadly never received help.

But they took their frustrations out on me and my sibling.

As a result, I have had major problems adjusting and never had many friends and missed many goals. I was lucky to actually finally go to uni & graduate (top of class, flunked out of previous uni) but sadly due the shitty southern African economy, I was barely able to find a job and then due to DV lost it. After that, I disclosed to my therapist that I had serious plans to kill myself.

The good man placed me in the only facility in the country, which was sadly a super understaffed shithole. I hope the situation improves for the patients and staff there, they do not deserve it.

I barely made it out and my sibling sent my mother a video of an English MP (Anne Widdecombe, screw her) saying something like "nobody has the right to live a life without insult" re: my being beaten by my father & becoming actively suicidal. I no longer speak to them.

I recovered and then my mother, the emotional abuser, made fun of my going to the psychologist. I have not been the same after that. I destroyed all my artwork and have refused treatment or help. I scraped by by tutoring highschoolers, while living with my terrible parents, because I could not live on my own due to finances.

We then had to move back to Serbia and I hate it here. Our apartment is a wreck, our things and the little money we had are gone. I am not even allowed to cry without being told that someone will take me to the psychiatric hospital because I am acting mad. I went to see a psych 1 time and get re-tested. I suppose I will have to go see them again to discuss results but I am done with this life.

I will hopefully get a job and only for a few months so that I can make enough money to buy the CTB substance and repay my parents the cost of having to live with them in this new country. I don't want to make friends, I don't want to integrate - I have severe social anxiety and I am living in hell.


Honestly, looking through this thread & even this site, there are lots of cool people here. I'm glad this site is here and we can all admit we feel this way, though I wish we didn't.

I wish we could all have the chance to receive help and better our lives, but since we have so many problems and it's unsure if we can get the help we need, I do wish everyone sincere peace and a lack of pain if they do CTB.

 

[mushi_tamago]

Confusion in her eyes that says it all
She's lost control
And she's clinging to the nearest passerby
She's lost control
And she gave away the secrets of her past
And said, "I've lost control again"
And to the voice that told her when and where to act
She said, "I've lost control again"
And she turned around and took me by the hand
And said, "I've lost control again"
And how I'll never know just why or understand
She said, "I've lost control again"
And she screamed out, kicking on her side, and said
"I've lost control again"
And seized up on the floor, I thought she'd die
She said, "I've lost control"
She's lost control again
She's lost control
She's lost control again
She's lost control
That I had to phone her friend to state my case
And say she's lost control again
And she showed up all the errors and mistakes
And said, "I've lost control again"
And she expressed herself in many different ways
Until she lost control again
And walked upon the edge of no escape
And laughed, "I've lost control"
She's lost control again
She's lost control
She's lost control again
She's lost control

As an aside - its cool to see a Joy Division enjoyer in the wild. Peace.

 

[neverexistedd]

Hello, I'm 24 years old turining 25 this year
I enjoy worldbuilding and making my own world, and also alternative history and stuff like that
I like to read books and sometimes draw
I don't remember much about my life
I hate this physicall world and this body and existence, I hate to eat breathe drink sleep pee and poo, I hate to be here

 

[Luvwww.com]

As an aside - its cool to see a Joy Division enjoyer in the wild. Peace.

Peace and love Peace and love to you too

I didn't receive the notification, so I'm only seeing your reply now! You feel that without ideal interpersonal relationships, life loses its meaning. Although I don't quite understand this pursuit, I think that suicide actually demonstrates your persistence in your ideals and meaning. So, you could consider your suicide as a form of self-actualization; that might make you feel a little better. "One day I will grow wings"—I recognized these lyrics from Let Down. This song resonates with the mindset of someone contemplating suicide, which is why I love it so much and have listened to it over 100 times. In May, I'm going to a hospital in a big city to see a doctor about cognitive impairment. I hope this will be a chance for metamorphosis; otherwise, I'll be shaking hands with carbon monoxide, haha.
Please forgive my poor writing skills.

I believe that your writing skills are as good as any, probably better than mine. Yeah, sometimes I think that I'm a coward, because I'm not following my principles. Sometimes I feel like I keep changing my principles in life to avoid comitting. I feel like a hypocrite.

But I don't believe that I would ever be able to do it. I am far too naive and delusionally hopeful. I think that me being this way may be a defense mechanism against the desolate reality I grew up in.

I always do believe that there is a chance. I hope your doctor is able to help, and even if he isn't able to, I think that medicine is advancing at rapid rates, especially due to AI. We should be able to cure all diseases, even including depression, within the next 10-15 years. Atleast I hope that it happens.

Hello.

I'm 32, AFAB non-binary person, currently residing in Serbia. I used to live in a part of Africa and even though the economy is shit there, I at least had my friends and we all kept each other sane.

I have suffered from depression since I was ~13, due to intermittent domestic violence and ongoing emotional abuse. The DV was a result of the war in this country in the 90s, which forced my parents to leave for Africa and uproot their lives. They never got over it and sadly never received help.

But they took their frustrations out on me and my sibling.

As a result, I have had major problems adjusting and never had many friends and missed many goals. I was lucky to actually finally go to uni & graduate (top of class, flunked out of previous uni) but sadly due the shitty southern African economy, I was barely able to find a job and then due to DV lost it. After that, I disclosed to my therapist that I had serious plans to kill myself.

The good man placed me in the only facility in the country, which was sadly a super understaffed shithole. I hope the situation improves for the patients and staff there, they do not deserve it.

I barely made it out and my sibling sent my mother a video of an English MP (Anne Widdecombe, screw her) saying something like "nobody has the right to live a life without insult" re: my being beaten by my father & becoming actively suicidal. I no longer speak to them.

I recovered and then my mother, the emotional abuser, made fun of my going to the psychologist. I have not been the same after that. I destroyed all my artwork and have refused treatment or help. I scraped by by tutoring highschoolers, while living with my terrible parents, because I could not live on my own due to finances.

We then had to move back to Serbia and I hate it here. Our apartment is a wreck, our things and the little money we had are gone. I am not even allowed to cry without being told that someone will take me to the psychiatric hospital because I am acting mad. I went to see a psych 1 time and get re-tested. I suppose I will have to go see them again to discuss results but I am done with this life.

I will hopefully get a job and only for a few months so that I can make enough money to buy the CTB substance and repay my parents the cost of having to live with them in this new country. I don't want to make friends, I don't want to integrate - I have severe social anxiety and I am living in hell.


Honestly, looking through this thread & even this site, there are lots of cool people here. I'm glad this site is here and we can all admit we feel this way, though I wish we didn't.

I wish we could all have the chance to receive help and better our lives, but since we have so many problems and it's unsure if we can get the help we need, I do wish everyone sincere peace and a lack of pain if they do CTB.

I also didn't want to be treated at first, I didn't want to be vulnerable, especially around my parents. but I think that it has helped, if not with my personal issues, but atleast regarding my family.

Also, you must realise that although this life was given to you by your mother, she does not own it anymore. If she tries to take control of your life, break away. I read somewhere(I might be wrong) that most people are depressed because they are living in a dysfunctional environment. Please change your surroundings, and you should be able to get better.

I will hopefully get a job and only for a few months so that I can make enough money to buy the CTB substance and repay my parents the cost of having to live with them in this new country. I don't want to make friends, I don't want to integrate - I have severe social anxiety and I am living in hell.

You don't have to repay your parents. I hope that I'm not misunderstanding your situation, but your parents are the ones responsible for you being this way. Leave them. Use that money to start a new life. Away from them.

Start a new life where the only one you're answerable to is you, yourself.

 

[nine.8]

Hey, I'm Utopia, or 9.8. just someone who made an account a while back to follow and lurk the forum. returned nack here recently because i need to realize that there are people who are going through what i am too. ill probably still lurk tho, lol

I like drawing and art in general, it calms me but other than that im not good at much
my fav band is Mili, and I also enjoy pokemon and deemo and other games too

fun fact if thats alright? my name(s) come from the songs utopiosphere and nine point eight.
Utopiosphere being the first song that got me into mili
Nine Point Eight being about someone who jumps at an acceleration of 9.8m/s (the acceleration experienced by everything in free fall regardless of mass) to be with her lover. Its a beautiful story put into a song, as with all mili songs;; probably one of the few things keeping me here, haha

 

[wannabeangel]

hi! i guess you can call me Angel, im new here after finding this place thru a vid talking badly about it, they didn't think it would bring me here lol. this place seems safe for me to be open tho, so im glad i can comment and everything now

im 23F from the north-east coast of the US, i like a lot of art and creative things, learning new things in general, video games, fashion, MTG, D&D but haven't been able to play truly and probably never will after my divorce, being chronically online. im also really into science of all sorts, i got a lot of interests tbh

i struggled with my mental health since childhood, at the very least 5, started as OCD and bad anxiety, its also highly likely im also autistic but i haven't went to the test yet, so that didnt help either. it got a lot worse around 8 making daily childhood life hard. i think i was truly suicidal around age 11, around the time i started to cut myself too. my mental health made me feel like a failure and i couldn't keep it under control especially as a kid, i've been in and out of psych wards due to it from around 12-13 to 17 years old. i've been inpatient about 19 times? but i learned to lie my way out a lot.

around the age 13-16 my physical health got a lot worse too, my genetic disorders just progress with age, and the chronic pain got so much worse. its slightly better than before on medication, but im still so tired of being in pain every day, on top of my mental health its torture. i always have to pull the strong act while i just want to end it. i didn't think i would make it past 18 since i was 11, the only thing that's stopped me from ctb is not wanting to hurt my family more. but i honestly dont know how much longer i can act strong.

what's made things even worse recently is going through a divorce with the love of my life, that i ruined with my own behavior, and i cant forgive myself for that. he was my only hope of a future i would enjoy living, now that it's gone.. that future is lost once again. it happened so quick, right after i woke up after an accidental OD in the bathroom. i wasnt even attempting, i was just trying to escape my mind and make my body tired to let me sleep at night. it feels like i did die in that bathroom, and i woke up in hell. i wish i would have hit my head or stopped breathing, then i wouldn't have to be in this mess of my own creation.

i dont know what my plans are yet, i still feel bad about hurting the people around me by ctb, but i need to get everything ready and prepared for if/when i finally decide to leave this body, and i wont be a wannabe anymore :) im here to help make my plans, and have people to talk to who can relate, without the fear of being reported or just given the usual concern of "please be safe for me" and "promise not to do anything" and "do you need to go to the hospital?" so this place seems good for me

im thankful to have found this place, and hope to be able to talk to others who can relate, even if our friendship on this planet has to be temporary. but dw i'll still be your friend always after you ctb if ur my friend we can link up in the clouds afterwards if you didn't decide to go the void route (i believe we choose where we go after death, usually based off faith and beliefs but i feel like you can just choose literally anything you want, you have the whole multiverse to choose from) im rambling now i think lol oops, but thats just me

 

[sadpeaceful_snorlax]

if ur my friend we can link up in the clouds afterwards if you didn't decide to go the void route (i believe we choose where we go after death, usually based off faith and beliefs but i feel like you can just choose literally anything you want, you have the whole multiverse to choose from) im rambling now i think lol oops, but thats just me

Welcome! I'm sorry for what you're going through, I understand dealing with regrets like that and I wish you the best! I hope you can find some peaceI think this site is a great safe place and people here are really kind and understanding, i don't really remember how I found it but pretty funny that video brought you here lol
Also I really like that idea that you can go anywhere you want when you CTB, that sounds really nice!

 

[wannabeangel]

Welcome! I'm sorry for what you're going through, I understand dealing with regrets like that and I wish you the best! I hope you can find some peaceI think this site is a great safe place and people here are really kind and understanding, i don't really remember how I found it but pretty funny that video brought you here lol
Also I really like that idea that you can go anywhere you want when you CTB, that sounds really nice!

thank you this site seems amazing so far even if i've been lurking more than anything recently. i find it funny the video that was trying to make the site seem terrible brought me here too lmao, they also tried to hide the name of it but they did not do a good job xD

and i always had that idea when you CTB in any way you get to go where you like, idk exactly where i got it from, i've always been pretty spiritual as a kid, i feel like all of the beliefs are true because people have faith in them, and that shapes realities i guess i dunno lol, that thought always brought me comfort when grieving and is also very comforting in this sense too

 

[pieberry]

I'm here because I feel like I don't fit into the world and don't have a future. This is mainly because I have focus and motivation issues. There's so much you have to do to survive that it's overwhelming. I force myself to work the bare minimum and am still exhausted. I'm a burden which is embarrassing. It feels selfish to keep living. If nothing changes, then me leaving would honestly be a benefit to everyone. I'm trying to get treatment first, but this is my backup option. I grew up with anxiety and wasn't treated super well by everyone, so I'm generally scared of other people. I also just wish the world was a better place. I wish I lived in some different world where everyone was nice to each other and there was less suffering. I want to either be happy or forgotten. I want it to be like I never existed, and no one remembers me. This is probably the only place I can say these things and not disturb anyone.

I also love animals and the beach.

 

[Noveliskov]

Hey guys,

Noticed a lot of threads pop up with new members saying hey. To reduce clutter we have decided to make a welcome thread for everyone new to introduce themselves and for people to welcome them, basically merging all future welcome posts into this one.

With that said, welcome to Sanctioned Suicide, we're a pro-choice forum; make sure to read the rules and check the resource sticky out too!

Post your introductions here!

Hello, I am Noveliskov i really like anime, games and have an interest in playing piano, I am on this thread to mainly contemplate here on life and make up my mind really.

Growing up i always felt like an outsider in every single aspect of my life, school, famliy, university like I am the only odd one out. I am a first year in university and sometimes feel like everything is going to go wrong at some point.

But i am still here active sometimes

 

[foreverandever]

Hey everyone! I'm foreverandever. I just recently found this site and decided to make an account because it seemed like a really supportive place. I'm in my early thirties and I'm male.

I've dealt with severe depression since I was 11. I've made 4 attempts, and I'm currently considering a fifth. I've hardly ever felt like I've belonged anywhere in my life. I don't really trust most of the people in my life, whether they actually care about me or if they're either pitying me or just going through the motions. I don't feel like I have any actual prospects for a career, relationship, anything like that anymore. But, I figured I'd come here to get advice, support, whatever.

Anyway, I'm into drawing, history, running, DnD, I'm fluent in one other language and I'm working on two others. I like anime, manga, Japanese stuff in general. Nice to meet all of you!

 

[tscorn]

After a lot of lurking I decided to finally make an account. Hi everyone. I've lived with depression my whole life, since I was a little kid. I'm in my 30s now and I'm feeling very hopeless. Everyone here is so lovely.