Discussion Instant vs Long-term Suicide

[GhostInTheMachine]

A long time ago, a friend and I were discussing his cigarette habit. I asked him why he smoked them if he was aware of the damage they caused him, to which he responded "I look it as a slow version of suicide". We both had ambivalent views on life so I didn't push back on that. I straight up understood his logic, and to this day I agree with it. I've noticed over the years that a lot more people have this exact same mentality with their negative habits, even if they would never admit it. I myself have some habits that I do hope shorten my lifespan if I never muster up the nerve to end it myself.

So now I ask the community here, if instant suicide becomes unfeasible for you, would you suffer the decline that comes with a long-term decay? What specifically would you do in the hopes your life becomes shorter? Do you worry about the suffering that would come with such a strategy, or do you think you keep keep it within tolerance?

Curious to see the views on this.

 

[Forveleth]

I used to have the same view of "killing myself slowly" instead of committing suicide. Then I realized that all that did was greatly decrease my quality of life. If I have to be alive, then I would rather live as healthy as possible so that health issues do not add to my misery. For example, I would never pick up smoking because then I would be alive and not able to breathe well and coughing all the time. I do not need physical health problems on top of my mental ones.

 

[Anonymousa]

If a long term suicide consumable where actually pleasant to me then maybe? Tho any alcohol I try just tastes disgusting and smoking just makes me cough and I don't feel like putting in the effort to get used to it where it becomes maybe good and still suffer from negative effects of addiction to them. Sadly can't access any drugs to get a long term suicide so can't even try those to see if I would like them (tho have been close to maybe getting weed with that random people come and ask me on my dog walks if I wanted to buy any but I never bring money with me).

 

[Off_Switch]

Both. Aim for instant, but do what you can to speed up the process in the meantime.

 

[NutOrat]

I did that, but not with cigarettes or alcohol or drugs, those for some reason I never considered in my life (somehow I still haven't once held a lit cigarette in my mouth). It was junk food. When I was away from home studying at uni in another city, in an apartment, all on my own, living off the money they sent me, instead of rationing the money like a responsible adult would, buying something useful like house utilities, clothes and whatnot, I wasted it all on junk food, almost daily. Chips, soda, cookies, chocolates. I was already depressed back then, and I wish my depression made me lose appetite like it does for many people here, cuz at least I'd look slim, and wouldn't consume heaps of that trash. Instead I was a fat slob, wasting parents money to poison myself daily, romanticizing it like I'm killing myself slowly. What a dumb fuck. All it did was give me stomach problems, flared my allergies and psoriasis, and likely gave me diabetes, or at least made sure I'll have it later in life. Devil's advocate, I was sure I wouldn't survive past the third year of uni, so I had no concerns of it coming back to haunt me in the future. Aaaand here I am :)

Please, if anyone reading this is doing something similar, I beg of you PLEASE STOP!!!

Then I realized that all that did was greatly decrease my quality of life.

I do not need physical health problems on top of my mental ones.

THAT! Exactly because of that.

 

[GhostInTheMachine]

I forgot to put in my personal path in this regard lol, but yeah I'm pretty much damaging myself in ways I think I can manage. I doubt I'm making it past my 50s in any case. I don't smoke cigarettes myself, but I used to smoke blunts and I abuse LSD pretty bad. Maybe I'll get dementia...

 

[passivethought121]

I think a lot of people believe in this, even more than any of us realize. They aren't willing to leave immediately but they aren't aspiring to grow old and die either.

 

[X-sanguinate86]

I'm definitely killing myself slowly but I wish I could just be healthy until I finally go through with self-delivery.

 

[ginko0]

I'm sorry, but that reminded of a The Smiths song, "what she said":

What she said
"I smoke 'cause I'm hoping for an early death
And I need to cling to something!"

Also, I'm literally doing that nowadays, cigarettes and all. But I'd never wanna experience that slow decay over the years. I want to still have the energy, will and soundness of mind to leave when I see fit.

 

[katarinabluu]

well this might feel stupid to say because of how obvious it is but living in itself is killing yourself slowly, sometimes i hope i just get cancer or something to speed up the process.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I tend to think people who 'live fast and die young' are maybe more about living a shorter, carefree, hedonistic life- rather than deliberately trying to shorten their lives. So, kind of going for quality over quantity- indulging themselves in things they enjoy- despite knowing the damage it's doing. If the ultimate aim is to kill themselves rather than just enjoy the next cigarette, drink or drug high, they could choose something faster acting.

I haven't taken the best care of my health- especially regarding diet and exercise and, I've suffered- likely as a result. I'm not sure it's really been worth it although- maybe. Food has been such a pleasure/ comfort. When I feel aches and pains in the body, I hope it's serious and that I'll die quickly from whatever it is. But, from my experience- it hasn't worked like that. Problems- even when they have developed quickly have caused huge amounts of pain without actually killing me. I think either waiting for natural illness or, promoting it as a suicide method is pretty risky.

The biggest fear being that we may make such a 'good' job of it where we ruin our health to the extent that we actually can't suicide and then die painfully and slowly while society tries to keep us alive.