Psychologically/biologically. Don't feel emotions particularly strongly and can't seem to form attachments to anyone. Don't have a bad life, no past trauma or anything. My brain just doesn't work the way it should and never has.
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I just lost the ability to be a person. I don't feel much anymore and just want to lock myself away because dealing with everything is becoming more painful by the day. But I hate being locked up doing nothing too, so there's no real escape from all of this. The only time I like is being asleep because I'm no longer conscious.
I sometimes wonder when I see what everyone says about their issues. You would think that maybe we were all poisoned when young. Like all those vaccines fucked our brains. That or the terrible education system setting us up for confusion once we are out in the real world.
TAW122
Emissary of the right to die.
- Aug 30, 2018
- 6,653
Socially ineptness, having a life-long condition which makes my day to day life with other people and human interaction very hellish (Aspergers), not being able to get into a relationship (I don't have any interest in one, but couldn't even get one if I actually did try), bad financial situation (high chance of being homeless in the coming months), and also I'd want the right to die since I never chose to be brought into this world and play the bullshit game called "life."
lifeisagame
lifeisagame
- Aug 31, 2018
- 10
i feel broken in the sense that i've been living my life under expectations set by the results my brother and sister left when they were my age. they both want to be doctors, and everytime someone asks me what i plan to do, i say that i don't know. in truth, i want to be a script writer. but the rules in my game have been set to follow someone else's rules. yet i somehow fixed myseld by breaking those rules. let's just hope i can keep on playing to the point where all the rules left in my game were left by me.
mattwitt
# 978
- Jun 28, 2018
- 2,307
The kind that can't be undone
bigj75
“From Knowledge springs power."
- Sep 1, 2018
- 2,540
physically and mentally. I had weight problems and organ failure and too much mental abuse as a child.
bigj75
“From Knowledge springs power."
- Sep 1, 2018
- 2,540
My life, my marriage just all. I had thyroid cancer and be hoping since they found a knot in my lymph nodes it has traveled.
bigj75
“From Knowledge springs power."
- Sep 1, 2018
- 2,540
I've never been married but relationships can definitely take a tole.
bigj75
“From Knowledge springs power."
- Sep 1, 2018
- 2,540
Volatile
God
- Jun 18, 2018
- 1,286
Oh god! Not another person who thinks vaccines are evil.
Kassender
Experienced
- Aug 29, 2018
- 210
Socially.
My family, while theyre not bad people, kind of used me as a scapegoat for everything.
My father always clearly despised me and still does. I tried all my childhood to please him to finally realize what a loser he actually is.
And im just like him.
Im pretty sure thats why we dont like each other.
Overall i was the child people dont like.
So, I became a people pleaser. A passive pussy with no personality.
Watching the world from afar, but with an ego so huge, i was convinced my shitty childhood was the sign of me being a future celebrity.
Reality caught up when i finally realized i was terrible at everything.
When i went to college i kind of gave up on my pipe dream when i began making friends.
I thought that was the most important.
I still do.
But all those friendships are now over.
I dont know what i did back then, but i cant connect with anyone anymore.
People have a clear problem with me.
I got a job 2 month ago, my boss was friendly at first but its gone to the point where he clearly cant stomach me.
I oscillate between hating myself and everyone else. It's torture.
Its not even all that,
I almost died at 1 year old from organ failures. I was never meant to survive.
My family, while theyre not bad people, kind of used me as a scapegoat for everything.
My father always clearly despised me and still does. I tried all my childhood to please him to finally realize what a loser he actually is.
And im just like him.
Im pretty sure thats why we dont like each other.
Overall i was the child people dont like.
So, I became a people pleaser. A passive pussy with no personality.
Watching the world from afar, but with an ego so huge, i was convinced my shitty childhood was the sign of me being a future celebrity.
Reality caught up when i finally realized i was terrible at everything.
When i went to college i kind of gave up on my pipe dream when i began making friends.
I thought that was the most important.
I still do.
But all those friendships are now over.
I dont know what i did back then, but i cant connect with anyone anymore.
People have a clear problem with me.
I got a job 2 month ago, my boss was friendly at first but its gone to the point where he clearly cant stomach me.
I oscillate between hating myself and everyone else. It's torture.
Its not even all that,
I almost died at 1 year old from organ failures. I was never meant to survive.
AntiLifeEric
Student
- Jun 20, 2018
- 145
I don't feel that I'm broken. I feel that this reality is broken. So I'm packing my bags before the really bad shit comes, and just so I don't waste any more years here in psychic pain, because I'm thinking about everyone else's pain and evil habits.
I'm extremely hideous and ugly and almost entirely incapable of social interaction or just doing anything at all. It's like I'm too shitty to live.
