Impulse

[Comaa]

I'm feeling like pacing in circles because I'm desperate to die tonight. I was never an impulsive person, so it makes me feel hollow how impulsive I feel this night to end my life. I don't want this, not while being unprepared. But I'm hearing things that are not even there, and I'm feeling things that are long past gone, things I've became numb to, but apparently not tonight. I'm craving the feeling of nausea and my body ceasing its functions one by one once more. But I don't want it like this, not with a guarantee of a possible fail. And I don't know how long I can keep this up.

 

[RazzleDazzle]

Ooof, yeah, sometimes lately I'm just crawling out of my skin. And I'm so fucking tired of having to drag myself through trying to survive. Things have become unbearable. But I've given myself a week to get things together a bit. I am trying to take some action, even a little bit, to keep going, even as I'm taking action on making plans. It's the best I can do right now.

I dunno, if you can put it off until next week, that might help with getting through tonight.