Most people don't know the truth or want to know because it hurts their feelings.
You want a truth. This is embaracing, but maybe that's a good way of making my point go across.
Today I went out with a friend that I'm secretly in love (sort of, didn't start that way) for 7+ years and her new boyfriend, and another friend of hers. I did that because she wanted me to accept this new part of her life. I got drunk pretty quickly to soften the imminent blow.
We had a good time, the alchohol numbed my feelings and the sting of watching them being infatuated with each other was tolerable.
On our drive home I fell asleep. Once I woke up, we parted ways. My drunken haze has subsided and it hit me: "They're about to have sex." I rushed out of the car and went into mine. They were already kissing besides her car. Jealousy took over and I cried all the way home. I wanted to punch the guy, cut off his member, bomb his house.
That being said, are you absolutely sure that all this rage is not just simple accumulated jelousy?
You didn't give a clear cut answer to similar remarks in the thread.
I don't know. Maybe it is some trauma you can't remember and if it is then I'm being insensitive and I'm sorry.
But then again, you said some things that make me think the problem could be much simpler. For example:
When is the last time u had a hug? I also feel this but my sadness has moved on to rage.
I'm just asking: are you absolutely certain that you are being honest to yourself and truthful about your feelings?