NSFW im thinking of some crazy methods

[segasonicexe]

i made a post a few days ago asking about anti freeze poisoning, and i got the answer that it's awful. Well, something has just kinda clicked in me. I've reached my limit. In a weird way, i want to suffer, I want my death to be a fucking show.

What i propose that that i cut off my man parts and bleed out. Maybe i could even write on the walls in my own blood as i bleed out on the floor. Personally i think it would be fitting for someone of my... identity to die like that. The only issue would be going through with actually cutting off my organs. I can't really afford pain killers, unless there are any on the market worth like `30 quid or something, so ill need something else. I was thinking of using rubber bands to cut off the flow, essentially killing anything there and maybe making everything numb enough to surgery myself. that only covers half of the issue. cutting into your own flesh is a very hard thing to do, even if theres no pain. How do i get over that? Does anyone have any suggestions?

or maybe i could just drink the anti freeze and fall into a coma

 

[PinballWizard39]

Trust me, I have a friend who has tried all sorts of things that make people gasp, including drinking ethylene glycol (anti freeze), and despite her best attempts, she's still alive but now alive with a lot of damage that cannot be reversed. Listening to her screams as to why she's still alive, are something I never want to hear again.

 

[CantDoIt]

I get that some of us feel we deserve to die or suffer, but even people who actually do horrible things like serial killers should not be killed using a cruel and unusual punishment. So why would you inflict it on yourself?

Even with self hated, I wish you could have some compassion for yourself.

 

[segasonicexe]

I get that some of us feel we deserve to die or suffer, but even people who actually do horrible things like serial killers should not be killed using a cruel and unusual punishment. So why would you inflict it on yourself?

Even with self hated, I wish you could have some compassion for yourself.

I don't see it as punishment. I see my death as an act of mercy. i just want my death to be big, you know? If im going to CTB, then why not make it a show? It'll be the last thing im remembered by, so lets make it something to really remember.

Trust me, I have a friend who has tried all sorts of things that make people gasp, including drinking ethylene glycol (anti freeze), and despite her best attempts, she's still alive but now alive with a lot of damage that cannot be reversed. Listening to her screams as to why she's still alive, are something I never want to hear again.

I'm really sorry to hear about your friend. I really and truly wish the best for you both. I understand the risk that'll come with ethylene consumption, but as stated above, i want an insane death. Plus, im so desperate to go, i need to board this bus as soon as i can

 

[EvisceratedJester]

Maybe let's not cut off our genitals? First off, it's unlikely that you'll even be able to get past the psychological barrier you need to in order to accomplish that in the first place. You would need to become desensitized first, which takes quite a bit of time and usually requires that you are being exposed to something first-hand over and over again. For example, when I cut myself deep enough to see my fat for the first time it scared the shit out of me, despite having been exposed to bean cuts online before. Desensitization takes a while and, in cases like this, cannot be accomplished through just looking up gorey videos and pictures. It requires that you experience it yourself repeatedly and even then there is no guarantee that you'll ever become desensitized to it.

Secondly, what does "I think it would be fitting for someone of my... identity to die like that" mean? I don't think that your identity should make it so that you deserve to die in a cruel and painful manner.

Thirdly, I feel like ctbing via cutting off your genitals is just painful and is probably not even going to work. The psychological and physical barriers are going to get in the way and you are probably more likely to end up in the hospital with permanent damage than instead of dying. You would just be putting yourself through a bunch of suffering for nothing.

 

[fallingasl33p]

Go to cannibal café and request everyone's good friends Armin Meiwes. I heard that parts a little tough though.

 

[sylvey]

i made a post a few days ago asking about anti freeze poisoning, and i got the answer that it's awful. Well, something has just kinda clicked in me. I've reached my limit. In a weird way, i want to suffer, I want my death to be a fucking show.

What i propose that that i cut off my man parts and bleed out. Maybe i could even write on the walls in my own blood as i bleed out on the floor. Personally i think it would be fitting for someone of my... identity to die like that. The only issue would be going through with actually cutting off my organs. I can't really afford pain killers, unless there are any on the market worth like `30 quid or something, so ill need something else. I was thinking of using rubber bands to cut off the flow, essentially killing anything there and maybe making everything numb enough to surgery myself. that only covers half of the issue. cutting into your own flesh is a very hard thing to do, even if theres no pain. How do i get over that? Does anyone have any suggestions?

or maybe i could just drink the anti freeze and fall into a coma

Same, I once almost went through with dismembering myself. Sometimes there's just a point you get to where you don't care anymore.