TheDevilsAngel

TheDevilsAngel

LetMeFree
Apr 22, 2019
768
Hey guys and gals it's been awhile since my last post, I need to vent and I have no one to do so with. So here I am.... Since I've last been on it's been a rollercoaster for me, good and bad. Right now as my circumstances stand I'm in a relationship which I don't feel secure I feel everyone is against me in this world especially my boyfriend, I feel he wants and desires other woman he says it's not true but in my head my demons tell me otherwise. I feel I'd be better single again but then I'll cut and get even more suicidal it's a continuous cycle. I'm so sick of this world and the majority of people in it. Only so many take the time to understand. I never saw myself as a bad person but maybe I am :( everything seems to go wrong for me and this isn't self pity not imo anyway . So what do I do ? Should I try escape or be here not to mention I'm afraid of him and what he may do if I end it, it's so hard and I see no way out. I can't end my life for years yet like how can I, I need to be here for my kids until there adults at least. I just want the voices in my head to stop I want to be free not lost in the depths of despair, it's been too long....maybe I'll never be free maybe I deserve to suffer, inside I'm screaming out for help. My meds clearly don't work well at times I feel they do I just don't know anything anymore I'm so lost ......
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,378
It must be so awful feeling trapped in that situation, existence really is just so unnecessarily cruel and it's understandable feeling so tired of this hellish world. But anyway I wish you the best.
 
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TheDevilsAngel

TheDevilsAngel

LetMeFree
Apr 22, 2019
768
It must be so awful feeling trapped in that situation, existence really is just so unnecessarily cruel and it's understandable feeling so tired of this hellish world. But anyway I wish you the best.
Thank you so much for your support and for everyone else's here. I appreciate knowing I'm not alone, there are so many people like me..... It might be easier for me if I wasn't so mentally ill and cant make my mind up or make proper decisions about my life.. I hate the demons in my head there completely taking over :(
 

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