I’m sorry

[Water-Lily]

I look at how I've lived my life, and I've failed

I always ran back and forth to my family, seeing them as a potential safe haven despite the fact that their actions have shown otherwise

I'm so weak. I'm not some "healing CPTSD warrior" or whatever the fuck terminology Reddit and narc survivor groups want to use

I'm not like the brave souls who'd rather risk homelessness and g no contact asap

I'm also a failure in that I refuse to "heal" and Dave aspects of myself/my past that need validation

They happened, they're real, I just don't want to discuss it. And according to some people, that's a very bad thing

So look I'm sorry I can't say the right thing. I'm sorry for scapegoating and minimizing my trauma

I'm sorry I can't be like you who's so strong you can call your abuser by labels and words that make me break down

I'm sorry I can't be like you all

I'm sure you're all confused as to what the fuck I am saying. Hell I don't know myself

So ignore this post and move on. I'll never make any sense

 

[Gaga786]

I look at how I've lived my life, and I've failed

I always ran back and forth to my family, seeing them as a potential safe haven despite the fact that their actions have shown otherwise

I'm so weak. I'm not some "healing CPTSD warrior" or whatever the fuck terminology Reddit and narc survivor groups want to use

I'm not like the brave souls who'd rather risk homelessness and g no contact asap

I'm also a failure in that I refuse to "heal" and Dave aspects of myself/my past that need validation

They happened, they're real, I just don't want to discuss it. And according to some people, that's a very bad thing

So look I'm sorry I can't say the right thing. I'm sorry for scapegoating and minimizing my trauma

I'm sorry I can't be like you who's so strong you can call your abuser by labels and words that make me break down

I'm sorry I can't be like you all

I'm sure you're all confused as to what the fuck I am saying. Hell I don't know myself

So ignore this post and move on. I'll never make any sense

I relate to this, because I feel the same way. Everyone tells me to move on and forget what happened, but how can I when I'm broken. There are so many complications that I have to live with after enduring my abuse and neglect. Im sorry that you are suffering so endlessly, and I hope you find the inner peace that you deserve.

 

[Izolita]

I had to move back to my family thinking they would be safety but realized it wasn't the case. I wish I could of survived I came from but I get panic attacks thinking about homelessness.
I had to move back to my family thinking they would be safety but realized it wasn't the case. I wish I could of survived I came from but I get panic attacks thinking about homelessness.

I can't imagine what you are going through

 

[Water-Lily]

I had to move back to my family thinking they would be safety but realized it wasn't the case. I wish I could of survived I came from but I get panic attacks thinking about homelessness.
I had to move back to my family thinking they would be safety but realized it wasn't the case. I wish I could of survived I came from but I get panic attacks thinking about homelessness.

I can't imagine what you are going through

Do you still live with them?

 

[Izolita]

Do you still live with them?

Right as of now yes