Burdenphilic
Member
- Dec 29, 2025
- 11
I'm so fucked up mentally, seriously.
No access to therapy, no access to meds, I live in a very judgemental society and can't maintain a job properly due to my horrible assimilation skills so I can't even receive any proper income. And the worst part of it all, I feel horrible that I can't become independent and have a bigger ego. Instead, I'm just a fucking pushover, sucking up to people so that I receive value, and if I try to oppose it, I just get left behind, and end up alone again, which I'm supposed to be just fine with, because I'm supposed to love myself.
I wish change was easy, I wish I even had the energy or courage to become more stable, I feel like I've become such a failure in life simply because I'm so fucking unstable, if I was to start listing all my mental problems, I could go on and on.
I'm just so tired, I don't really want to die, but I feel like death is just such a huge relief from all of this, like with death there's no happiness no sadness, just nothing. That, at least, is better than constantly having panic attacks and losing my mind. I'm so lucky that I don't have access to drugs or alcohol, or else I don't know what I'd end up doing.
No access to therapy, no access to meds, I live in a very judgemental society and can't maintain a job properly due to my horrible assimilation skills so I can't even receive any proper income. And the worst part of it all, I feel horrible that I can't become independent and have a bigger ego. Instead, I'm just a fucking pushover, sucking up to people so that I receive value, and if I try to oppose it, I just get left behind, and end up alone again, which I'm supposed to be just fine with, because I'm supposed to love myself.
I wish change was easy, I wish I even had the energy or courage to become more stable, I feel like I've become such a failure in life simply because I'm so fucking unstable, if I was to start listing all my mental problems, I could go on and on.
I'm just so tired, I don't really want to die, but I feel like death is just such a huge relief from all of this, like with death there's no happiness no sadness, just nothing. That, at least, is better than constantly having panic attacks and losing my mind. I'm so lucky that I don't have access to drugs or alcohol, or else I don't know what I'd end up doing.
