Venting I'm so sorry but Im hurting a lot right now

[nerve]

I'm so so sorry for taking up this space. Like I know it's okay for other people but I suck so maybe it's not okay for me. I don't know. Please just block me and ignore this thread if I'm being a spoiled brat and hogging the attention. Or please PM me if I'm bothering you and I promise I won't try something like this again.

I don't even have a point. I don't have it in me to talk about what's really upsetting me. Most of the time I just try to bury how I'm feeling in a pre-existing thread so less people will have to notice but I'm going to give myself a break tonight and shout a little louder into the void because I'm hating being here right now so badly and there's no one around me who really cares.

 

[VIBRITANNIA]

there isn't a need to apologize for venting. there is no such thing as taking up space on a site that was meant for this purpose. i can't offer any words of comfort but i do hope tomorrow is better for you.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I always appreciate your posts, and all of the reacts I've gotten from you as well.

I'm glad you're taking up some space!

It would be great if you felt safe enough to talk here about what's bothering you, but if not, at least you did some shouting.

 

[Nymph]

I'm so so sorry for taking up this space. Like I know it's okay for other people but I suck so maybe it's not okay for me. I don't know. Please just block me and ignore this thread if I'm being a spoiled brat and hogging the attention. Or please PM me if I'm bothering you and I promise I won't try something like this again.

I don't even have a point. I don't have it in me to talk about what's really upsetting me. Most of the time I just try to bury how I'm feeling in a pre-existing thread so less people will have to notice but I'm going to give myself a break tonight and shout a little louder into the void because I'm hating being here right now so badly and there's no one around me who really cares.

You can vent as much as you want. That's one of the reasons this site exists. Don't apologize people are not going to block you, your posts deserve to be seen:)

 

[Deleted member 19654]

There's no need to apologise. You're allowed to have a voice on this website so please don't feel like you can't talk/vent about what's bothering you. We're here to listen and to help if we can.

 

[Living_Hurts_so_Much]

I'm so so sorry for taking up this space. Like I know it's okay for other people but I suck so maybe it's not okay for me. I don't know. Please just block me and ignore this thread if I'm being a spoiled brat and hogging the attention. Or please PM me if I'm bothering you and I promise I won't try something like this again.

I don't even have a point. I don't have it in me to talk about what's really upsetting me. Most of the time I just try to bury how I'm feeling in a pre-existing thread so less people will have to notice but I'm going to give myself a break tonight and shout a little louder into the void because I'm hating being here right now so badly and there's no one around me who really cares.

I care. I know a lot of us here do. We all know how you feel. *hugs*

 

[inactive]

Very relatable, OP. I'm sorry to hear that you're going through a rough time :(

 

[nerve]

Thank you everybody for your replies :,) I felt super embarrassed and had to hide away for a bit after posting, but it looks like I didn't have much to worry about. A huge chunk of me is like "This is just you manipulating these kind people into thinking you deserve to take up their space!!" but at least there's no real objective proof of that. I think I don't regret reaching out here!

Fun / sad story: during the downtime just now, I felt really terrible again and tried getting through to a crisis hotline about 10 times before finally giving up. It's Friday night so theyre busy and all that but I just kept thinking about how I typically get quicker & more positive feedback from the ""suicide cult"" website than I do from hotlines I'm constantly being steered towards.

 

[Worthless_nobody]

Hey I definitely understand the feeling. I usually never post my own threads either I just vent it out in existing threads. But vent away that's what the site is for, our safe space to be accepted. Sending you hugs.

 

[Wisdom3_1-9]

I'm so so sorry for taking up this space. Like I know it's okay for other people but I suck so maybe it's not okay for me. I don't know. Please just block me and ignore this thread if I'm being a spoiled brat and hogging the attention.

You take the space you need! You deserve it as much as anyone else. You have value and your words have value. Please, please, please never be apologetic about venting here. It's so good for ALL of us to share in each other's experiences.

Fun / sad story: during the downtime just now, I felt really terrible again and tried getting through to a crisis hotline about 10 times before finally giving up. It's Friday night so theyre busy and all that but I just kept thinking about how I typically get quicker & more positive feedback from the ""suicide cult"" website than I do from hotlines I'm constantly being steered towards.

I have never called one of those lines, but I'm honestly shocked to hear that you might not get through. I know it sounds silly, but it never occurred to me that might happen. I think of it as an emergency line. What if you called 911/999 and there was no response?! Anyway, I'm sure SS is more therapeutic and supportive anyway.

 

[muffin222]

I'm sorry you're hurting so badly It's shocking to me that you weren't able to get through to a hotline...isn't that what they're there for?! I'm glad you have this site for support so you aren't alone

 

[Sprite_Geist]

I don't have it in me to talk about what's really upsetting me.

That's totally okay. It can be very difficult to truly express your feelings especially if you are not used to doing it, or if whatever is upsetting you is very painful. Once and *if* you feel ready you can share as much or as little as you want. This community has a lot of people who want to listen; just look above at all of the kind responses.

A huge chunk of me is like "This is just you manipulating these kind people into thinking you deserve to take up their space!!" but at least there's no real objective proof of that. I think I don't regret reaching out here!

Talking about your problems and wanting help is not manipulation, and this is everyones space including yours, so yes you do deserve to be here!

 

[Sensei]

As far as I'm concerned, you can post three pages of threads as long as it makes you feel better.