Venting I'm so selfish

[DynamicDepression]

I've wasted so much of my beloved's life only to now traumatize him by dying. Why did I have to have met him? Why did I have to drag him into my delusions that there was a future for me? I'm such a terrible person. I just want him to be happy and be with someone who is deserving of his love. I don't want to hurt him anymore.

 

[lostmylove]

I just lost my partner last week. He died.

I have no regrets about meeting him, although we had some really really difficult times. I loved him with all my heart. I don't look at anything with regret only that we couldn't stay longer.

I hope before he died he didn't have similar regrets to you, love is the only thing in this life worth living for. Please don't feel selfish

 

[unkuto]

Blaming yourself is never going to help you to solve anything. You should stop doing that regardless what you did and what happened because you can't revert it.

 

[FuneralCry]

I can imagine that it must be painful what you are going through. I hope you find relief from your suffering in whatever happens.

 

[SortaTired]

I'm in a similiar situation, I have an amazing boyfriend. I know what he would say, when I'm gone he wouldn't have viewed our relationship as a "waste". He'd treasure the memories. Each and every one of them, though he would feel pain, more pain than I think I can inflict on him. He's the type of person who is just happy and uplifting and brings light to everyone around him. What if I'm the one who extinguishes that light? I don't think I could ever forgive myself, not that I would have to. I guess my problems would likely end at that moment.

What a pickle we've gotten ourselves into isn't it? Having found love and been able to experience it and now we are faced with either eternal pain or possibly snuffing out the light of our loved one. Life's cruel in that way.