I’m so angry and violent today I could punch a hole in the wall

[WitheringAway]

I usually have a good temper but i am enraged today I was literally shaking earlier.. I've been driven to a point where I feel like im literally a victim and I need to stand up for myself in a violent way. I don't know why I keep attracting confrontation and fights but it is what it is and I gotta deal with it I seriously wanna physically hurt this bitch who keeps talking shit behind my back and by shit I mean like straight up ruining my reputation. like she doesn't even have the courage to say it to my face only in group chats I'm not a part of. I really really just wanna slap her and beat her tf up. Never felt this way before about someone like I do right now. I'm sick of dealing with this shit and sucking up their bullshit like I don't know about it I'm sick and tired of dealing with this shit

 

[FuneralCry]

Some people are just so awful and cruel. Others really are capable of making our lives much worse. I personally cannot stand most people. I can imagine that it must be horrible what you are going through, I wish you the best.

 

[Manaaja]

I know that feeling. Anger and rage and sometimes even violence are very humans feelings. It doesn't mean you are bad, it just means you were treated too badly for too long. It's kinda like how my dog would usually never bite me, but if I touched her hurt side (and sometimes during nail cutting) she would show teeth and make a fake bite. It's just telling "Hey, this is too much! Please, back off, don't do that!".

(I wish I had trained the nail cutting better, but the dog didn't live with me, so it was harder to train and teach her like I wanted.)

Punch a pillow or throw the pillow around the room.

Btw, there was a study that sometimes social damage literally hurts physically more than physical damage. So a person punching you lightly can actually do less physical damage to you than a person socially and psychologically damaging you.

 

[TooConscious]

Can you get a punch bag?
I have brittle bones and one functioning arm but I have a bag of suitable size and weight so I don't lose my temper and hit the wall breaking bones or damaging things and try to use the energy positively,well, somewhat. The pain of knuckles or shin slapping pressureseems to relieve stress. But all in all other than drugs which end up doing more harm we are trapped with these horrible feelings in this depraved hell of sociopaths. Meditation is OK but he'll I'm not gonna say it's gets better just try to do as little harm to yourself killing someone sucks prison is no good.

 

[charlottewilts]

Btw, there was a study that sometimes social damage literally hurts physically more than physical damage. So a person punching you lightly can actually do less physical damage to you than a person socially and psychologically damaging you.

This is quite true. Unfortunately, emotional pain hits the same centre in the brain as physical pain, which is why it feels good to self-harm to override it. Please don't do it though. As Manaaja said, you are not a bad person for feeling this way. I hope you can distance yourself from this person. I used to attract bullshit and horrible, manipulative people too. I was very naive back then. I hope you can learn from her crap to avoid such people in the future and find yourself better friends..! I used to think it was impossible but I managed to. As others have said, get a punching bag or write down what you want to tell her on a piece of paper and then tear it up or burn it. Coming here to vent to us is also a great thing. Best of luck and keep your chin up

 

[Someone123]

I usually have a good temper but i am enraged today I was literally shaking earlier.. I've been driven to a point where I feel like im literally a victim and I need to stand up for myself in a violent way. I don't know why I keep attracting confrontation and fights but it is what it is and I gotta deal with it I seriously wanna physically hurt this bitch who keeps talking shit behind my back and by shit I mean like straight up ruining my reputation. like she doesn't even have the courage to say it to my face only in group chats I'm not a part of. I really really just wanna slap her and beat her tf up. Never felt this way before about someone like I do right now. I'm sick of dealing with this shit and sucking up their bullshit like I don't know about it I'm sick and tired of dealing with this shit

It's a tough thing but pllease think through the consequences, there are better ways to fight back, somehow fighting verbally on in onlin e posts to protect your reputation, though try to not escalate this into violence or threats of violence -it will hurt you to do this and you need to protect yourself.