I’m not ready to face/say certain things about my trauma history and that’s on (I hope it is)

[Water-Lily]

One thing I do to myself is force myself to be to a place with my recovery. I find that I idioloze what is portrayed online (especially in trauma based subreddits such as r/raisedbynarcissists and r/CPTSD)

Talks of going no contact, leaving your abusers ASAP, having severe trauma discoveries and breakdowns. Having to feel certain ways towards abusive family, trying a bunch of therapies and medications, etc

These things do work and are necessary, but can't be done all at once. Trauma is tricky, and approaching it fast is like trying to built a house when you haven't learnt the basics of building. You'll fail because you're rushing

Some places aren't meant for me rn. It's probably why I fall apart when I'm faced with something I can't or isn't willing to make space for right now

I still feel bad, especially when I compare myself to others (Jeanette Mccurdy and how she talks about her mom. I can't be like her rn)

I don't know if I am making much sense

 

[cami]

hey lovely. yeah, i get it. small steps. it's a marathon not a sprint, and i personally believe you can reach the finish line. sending hope <3

 

[Water-Lily]

hey lovely. yeah, i get it. small steps. it's a marathon not a sprint, and i personally believe you can reach the finish line. sending hope <3

I dont know. it seems so hard and brutal

 

[cami]

I dont know. it seems so hard and brutal

it is hard and brutal. it is so so hard. somedays you will fall down and cry. but i find that it is worth it on the days you smile. and laugh. and feel something other than sadness or pain. its a journey but you are not alone on it. when you fall down we on SS are here to try and lift you up. much love and care.

 

[Water-Lily]

it is hard and brutal. it is so so hard. somedays you will fall down and cry. but i find that it is worth it on the days you smile. and laugh. and feel something other than sadness or pain. its a journey but you are not alone on it. when you fall down we on SS are here to try and lift you up. much love and care.

if its hard then I honestly dont want to do it

I didnt mean to react. I just feel tired of everything. Of this journey we're forced on if we want to live a good life. The obstacles. The challenges. it's not fair that it has to be painful. I dont want to do it. I dont want to feel pain. It feels never ending, and its sad that the only option is to keep going/hurting

 

[empty sighs]

I get it. My therapist told me "maybe I'm not ready for therapy" because I kept mumbling over my words, and didn't feel comfortable talking about my traumas. But I definitely feel everyone should be able to take their own time in processing their emotions.

 

[cami]

I get it. My therapist told me "maybe I'm not ready for therapy" because I kept mumbling over my words, and didn't feel comfortable talking about my traumas. But I definitely feel everyone should be able to take their own time in processing their emotions.

that is so terrible. im sorry they said that, but they're wrong. just go at it at your own pace.

 

[Water-Lily]

that is so terrible. im sorry they said that, but they're wrong. just go at it at your own pace.

This. I swear so many people should not be therapists. So many people have a lack of empathy and don't care about providing a safe space for trauma victims