LemonadeArc
L'Arc
- Sep 11, 2023
- 11
Today, another day, living this awful excuse of existence. Previously I mentioned I found myself a girlfriend, but I can't keep this going, I can't get myself to live anymore if I continue this relationship, everyday it is me who is the problem, everyday it is me who needs to change, I've been through an enormous transformation, I even killed every possibility of me becoming the woman I wanted to be just for her, just living pretending I work as a man, everyday is just her obliterating me at any given chance. Yesterday I go drunk, she got mad at that. I argued back saying she went partying three consecutive nights and I had to swallow that down. It was a tennis match of her accusing me of something and me giving a time she did the same as a response. She then proceeded to complain about me not giving her yellow flowers, I simply don't have the money, I'm literally in debt in order to pay for something she ordered, at least I tried to do something cute. Then out of the blue she said we were breaking up and had me crying almost three hours, I even showed her what I was working on and she didn't even cared. After a lot of tears, she then said we weren't breaking up, but I was already shattered, I even cut myself after 6 months of not doing so out of despair. Now she went to a concert with her cousin, like she didn't destroy me mentally. This relationship is going to kill me, I need tu cut down this awful dependency.
