Im new and dont want to live

[particularrodent]

i know you miss your wife, and you're hurt, but in your posts you seem to blame your wife a lot for being uncomfortable with your actions. whether these actions results from addiction or not does not remove the fact that your wife not being comfortable with you anymore is completely valid considering your crime. you can be the greatest husband and person in the world, but that crime is a crime for a reason. further, you can truly be regretful and never do it again, but people with addictions cannot simply be trusted so easily like that, because most of the time "i'll never do it again" is not what occurs due to, well, the fact that they have an addiction. the only thing you can do now is serve whatever time or tasks the court assigns you with dedication as proof of your regret, try as best as you can to access therapy or other resources for your condition, and let your wife and her family move on. as part of the suffering you yourself have said you deserve, you have to accept that as a consequence. all of this easier said than done as a stranger on the internet, of course, but serious crimes have serious results

 

[dead dav]

i know you miss your wife, and you're hurt, but in your posts you seem to blame your wife a lot for being uncomfortable with your actions. whether these actions results from addiction or not does not remove the fact that your wife not being comfortable with you anymore is completely valid considering your crime. you can be the greatest husband and person in the world, but that crime is a crime for a reason. further, you can truly be regretful and never do it again, but people with addictions cannot simply be trusted so easily like that, because most of the time "i'll never do it again" is not what occurs due to, well, the fact that they have an addiction. the only thing you can do now is serve whatever time or tasks the court assigns you with dedication as proof of your regret, try as best as you can to access therapy or other resources for your condition, and let your wife and her family move on. as part of the suffering you yourself have said you deserve, you have to accept that as a consequence. all of this easier said than done as a stranger on the internet, of course, but serious crimes have serious results

Yes I know so maybe I should just end it

 

[particularrodent]

Yes I know so maybe I should just end it

in this case it seems more to me like you're trying to run away from what you've done instead of suffer for it... i can't make the decision for you, but there are better ways to deal with the fallout. another user mentioned getting involved with charity regarding victims of your crime. it's a good idea

 

[dontwakemeup]

Yes I know so maybe I should just end it

I'd like to add to this great reply. When people do things to hurt others, unfortunately you don't also get the right to determine what their response should or could be. Some infractions people can forgive you in time but if they do, it doesn't mean reconciliation. I have forgave everyone that have done me wrong but I never wish to see them again. If people try to interrupt what I have decided I find it offensive and disrespectful. Give your family time. You can't rush the process. I won't say give up on them but respect their need for space and understanding. Focus on you and your healing right now. And even if you successfully comitt suicide it will never stop their pain, only yours.

 

[dead dav]

I'd like to add to this great reply. When people do things to hurt others, unfortunately you don't also get the right to determine what their response should or could be. Some infractions people can forgive you in time but if they do, it doesn't mean reconciliation. I have forgave everyone that have done me wrong but I never wish to see them again. If people try to interrupt what I have decided I find it offensive and disrespectful. Give your family time. You can't rush the process. I won't say give up on them but respect their need for space and understanding. Focus on you and your healing right now. And even if you successfully comitt suicide it will never stop their pain, only yours.

Thank you I understand