Im going to get TMS therapy

[Pearl]

I have done ketamine treatment in the past without much improvement. Gonna give TMS a try. Idk if it'll work but it's either that or I pray everyday I die in my sleep because I am too much of a coward to CTB in a painful way and I dont have access to N or anything else peaceful. I have been hopeless for so long so not sure what this therapy holds for me, but better than nothing + constant mental anguish. I'm getting so tired of waking up in the morning and going "ugh I'm still here".

 

[BlazingBob]

I did 40 sessions of TMS over 2 months. I've also done ketamine infusions.

 

[Kerrtu]

I'm getting so tired of waking up in the morning and going "ugh I'm still here".

I feel this deeply.

In fact, I was talking with a friend earlier about that feeling specifically and how for the first time in years, after breaking things off with my partner, I had a couple of days where I woke up without that familiar feeling of exactly how you put it - "ugh I'm still here".

I've not tried ketamine in a hospital setting but remember wanting to try it as it seemed to be such a breakthrough for people with MDD, PTSD, etc. Unfortunately, ketamine treatments aren't yet practiced where I live.

While I have had ECT treatments, I've not tried TMS. My sister had wanted me to try it and was considering it for herself.

I hope TMS works for you, gives you relief, ultimately helps you out of the pit of despair.

You're not a coward at all - you're fighting an uphill battle, and things just may turn around in your favor.

It takes a lot of strength - you may not feel you have it, but it's there.

Please keep the forum posted if you're able. I know I'll be interested in hearing how it goes, and I'm definitely pulling for you.

 

[Pearl]

I did 40 sessions of TMS over 2 months. I've also done ketamine infusions.

How did that go for you? And improvement?

 

[AeroReese]

TMS is a new one on me, what is it and how did you go about seeking it?

Something new is still worth trying for me at this point so I'm listening :)

 

[toofargone6969]

I really really hope it works for you. I did the accelerated version, 50 treatments in 5 days. It unfortunately did not help me, but it does help most people. Some even get full remission. Its def worth a shot. I wish you the best.
Btw there are some differences between machines. It depends on if your insurance covers it too. Brainsway is a good machine if you can find a clinic with it. It goes much deeper than ones like magventure. But hopefully your provider will know exactly what you need and for how long. Just wanted to mention that cause I did tons of research before doing it and realized all the clinics are very different. I hope you have a great outcome, please update us. Good luck <3

 

[conflagration]

Keep in mind that some people are getting brain damage from it despite doctors claiming is completly harmless. Checkout facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2151708711597190
If this is choice between TMS and suicide I guess TMS is worth a shot, but only as last resort method.

 

[Pearl]

I feel this deeply.

In fact, I was talking with a friend earlier about that feeling specifically and how for the first time in years, after breaking things off with my partner, I had a couple of days where I woke up without that familiar feeling of exactly how you put it - "ugh I'm still here".

I've not tried ketamine in a hospital setting but remember wanting to try it as it seemed to be such a breakthrough for people with MDD, PTSD, etc. Unfortunately, ketamine treatments aren't yet practiced where I live.

While I have had ECT treatments, I've not tried TMS. My sister had wanted me to try it and was considering it for herself.

I hope TMS works for you, gives you relief, ultimately helps you out of the pit of despair.

You're not a coward at all - you're fighting an uphill battle, and things just may turn around in your favor.

It takes a lot of strength - you may not feel you have it, but it's there.

Please keep the forum posted if you're able. I know I'll be interested in hearing how it goes, and I'm definitely pulling for you.

thank you for such a heartfelt reply. I dont know what I expected from this therapy, it's just something to do while I am living without a peaceful way out, but maybe it will be helpful? I have stopped being hopeful and positive along time ago. I usually always expect the worse. I will see post updates.

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

I did 40 sessions of TMS over 2 months. I've also done ketamine infusions.

Did either work to any degree for you?

I have done ketamine treatment in the past without much improvement. Gonna give TMS a try. Idk if it'll work but it's either that or I pray everyday I die in my sleep because I am too much of a coward to CTB in a painful way and I dont have access to N or anything else peaceful. I have been hopeless for so long so not sure what this therapy holds for me, but better than nothing + constant mental anguish. I'm getting so tired of waking up in the morning and going "ugh I'm still here".

I tried 6 sessions of ketamine to no avail. Very enjoyable experience that I wish I could do all the time, but it did not improve my life in any way long term. I pray that TMS works for you. I'm interested in trying it myself. I would love to see you report back in the near future with some positive results for yourself.

 

[BlazingBob]

Unfortunately TMS didn't do anything for me except make my anxiety worse. The psychiatrist sent me on my way with a months supply of Xanax. However, I have a neurological sleep disease which makes restorative sleep impossible. Sleep is right up there with eating in importance. Being extremely sleep deprived and exhausted could've hindered the TMS. Same thing with the ketamine infusions. During one of the ketamine sessions I became completely untethered from reality, which was a first for me. I thought I'd died. I wasn't happy when I came to. I wanted to stay where I was. One effect the infusions did have was make my wallet a lot thinner at $750 a pop

 

[Pearl]

Keep in mind that some people are getting brain damage from it despite doctors claiming is completly harmless. Checkout facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/2151708711597190
If this is choice between TMS and suicide I guess TMS is worth a shot, but only as last resort method.

Wish it just kills me to be honest. That would be the most perfect side effect.

 

[MatrixPrisoner]

Unfortunately TMS didn't do anything for me except make my anxiety worse. The psychiatrist sent me on my way with a months supply of Xanax. However, I have a neurological sleep disease which makes restorative sleep impossible. Sleep is right up there with eating in importance. Being extremely sleep deprived and exhausted could've hindered the TMS. Same thing with the ketamine infusions. During one of the ketamine sessions I became completely untethered from reality, which was a first for me. I thought I'd died. I wasn't happy when I came to. I wanted to stay where I was. One effect the infusions did have was make my wallet a lot thinner at $750 a pop

Yes, I had the same disconnect from reality on my last and most intense dosage session. I was transported to what felt like a small room in another dimension forever. Not sure if it was in life or death. Kind of like the space Matthew McConauhey was in at the end of the movie Interstellar. Even though I felt trapped there for eternity, I was oddly ok with it. My first session was the best. There was a picture of an ocean scene on the wall in the clinic room. Once the ketamine started setting in, the picture started moving and I felt the need to peacefully connect with the people in life that I was fighting with. It was beautiful.

 

[Mayonaise]

I have done ketamine treatment in the past without much improvement. Gonna give TMS a try. Idk if it'll work but it's either that or I pray everyday I die in my sleep because I am too much of a coward to CTB in a painful way and I dont have access to N or anything else peaceful. I have been hopeless for so long so not sure what this therapy holds for me, but better than nothing + constant mental anguish. I'm getting so tired of waking up in the morning and going "ugh I'm still here".

I hope you gave it a try. As you said, better try than doing nothing. Sometimes ECT is an option too. Any updates about you are appreciated

 

[joshua9119]

I have done ketamine treatment in the past without much improvement. Gonna give TMS a try. Idk if it'll work but it's either that or I pray everyday I die in my sleep because I am too much of a coward to CTB in a painful way and I dont have access to N or anything else peaceful. I have been hopeless for so long so not sure what this therapy holds for me, but better than nothing + constant mental anguish. I'm getting so tired of waking up in the morning and going "ugh I'm still here".

Thanks for sharing the results of your valuable experience!

 

[Lostindespair3]

I have done ketamine treatment in the past without much improvement. Gonna give TMS a try. Idk if it'll work but it's either that or I pray everyday I die in my sleep because I am too much of a coward to CTB in a painful way and I dont have access to N or anything else peaceful. I have been hopeless for so long so not sure what this therapy holds for me, but better than nothing + constant mental anguish. I'm getting so tired of waking up in the morning and going "ugh I'm still here".

I feel your pain…I think the exact same thing when I wake up…or some version of it. I have tried ketamine, ECT, and TMS and nothing worked. I pray it works for you though!! Good luck.