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StrugglingSienna

StrugglingSienna

Suicidal Trans Girl
Mar 16, 2025
187
I have been so dysphoric and suicidal for quite some time despite a decent life situation. Every time I go to my psychiatrist I tell her this stuff isn't working and thankfully she listens but it always ends up being to put me on another SSRI. So far I've been through escitalopram, fluoxetine, etc etc and I'm tired of this stuff. I only see her once every three months but I need to try some new things fast if I want to have any chance at saving my life.

My working plan is to order a one month supply of at least one drug in each antidepressant class off of an online pharmacy and trialing each of them to see if any of them benefit me greatly. Based on previous experiences with online pharmacies this will be surprisingly inexpensive. I'm particularly curious about the tricyclics, as apparently they seem to work pretty well, they were just supplanted by SSRIs because SSRIs have fewer side effects.

I'm going to try to be careful, obviously, and make sure not to try anything that has dangerous interactions with my other prescriptions. And probably order my own lab tests too depending on the drug.

I'm kinda spitballing here. I can sense that my life is in danger and I'm going to take matters into my own hands. At the end of the day, I want to CTB anyways, so what's the harm? Has anyone else here done or thought of doing something similar?
 
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WishfulNeanderthal

WishfulNeanderthal

Wishing for better times
Apr 18, 2025
24
Im not a medical professional and i do a little bit of DYI Self medicating with psychedelics, but i'd say that as long as you check drug interaction sheets, half-life time of the specific substances and then of course legit sources on how to taper off them/increase the dosage, it should be ok.

Make sure you:
1. Check drug interaction sheets (So that it doesn't result in serotonin syndrome)
2. Check half-life time of the specific medicine when you are tapering off it.
3. Make sure to save/create a document with information on how and when to increase dosage/taper off the substance, since some SSRI can be really risky when it comes to cold-turkeying them.
4. Avoid alcohol and try not to mix other drugs/substances during the "trial period" to get the cleanest result.
5. Write everything down in a document so you can keep track of what works and what side effects you experience.

And good on the lab tests, that def needed since it never hurts to be 100% sure its the right thing. Good luck!
 
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bankai

bankai

Experienced
Mar 16, 2025
268
Looks like you're working hard and actually trying to come up with a plan. Good luck.
 
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getoutgirl

getoutgirl

<3
Mar 17, 2025
231
I have 0 clue about any of that, so can't offer much. Sounds risky, when you mix a lot of those the brain can get funky. But if you say you are going to be careful, ask for info and so on, go for it girl. You are trying options. Like you say if the alternative is just dying, might aswell, might work even or make it easier. Good luck!
 
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Linda

Linda

Member
Jul 30, 2020
1,868
I have been so dysphoric and suicidal for quite some time despite a decent life situation. Every time I go to my psychiatrist I tell her this stuff isn't working and thankfully she listens but it always ends up being to put me on another SSRI. So far I've been through escitalopram, fluoxetine, etc etc and I'm tired of this stuff. I only see her once every three months but I need to try some new things fast if I want to have any chance at saving my life.

My working plan is to order a one month supply of at least one drug in each antidepressant class off of an online pharmacy and trialing each of them to see if any of them benefit me greatly. Based on previous experiences with online pharmacies this will be surprisingly inexpensive. I'm particularly curious about the tricyclics, as apparently they seem to work pretty well, they were just supplanted by SSRIs because SSRIs have fewer side effects.

I'm going to try to be careful, obviously, and make sure not to try anything that has dangerous interactions with my other prescriptions. And probably order my own lab tests too depending on the drug.

I'm kinda spitballing here. I can sense that my life is in danger and I'm going to take matters into my own hands. At the end of the day, I want to CTB anyways, so what's the harm? Has anyone else here done or thought of doing something similar?
I think that's a good idea, provided you are careful - and from your post it seems that you will be. One potential problem you need to be aware of is that some antidepressants require quite a long time before they begin to have much effect. One month might not be enough to give them a fair chance. Perhaps two months would be better.
 
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