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AintNoWayOut

Student
Jan 6, 2020
173
i want to die, im sick of participating in this rigged bullshit, but then i remember that it requires a method, and executing said method, and enduring a level of pain and discomfort and having the mental fortitude to push through my survival instinct... and then i feel sick to my stomach and helpless.

i need a pill to take or a button to press. or a doctor compassionate enough to put me out of my misery. fuck....

or i simply need to read up on more methods since im becoming more serious about it now. the last thing i remember setting my mind on was a method involving inhaling helium i believe, which i read is supposed to be quick and painless, but that seems too good to be true. i just need to grow the balls to really start planning something.
 
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evolutionerror

evolutionerror

Corrupted DNA
Sep 5, 2022
46
SI isn't easy to overcome. I don't think this makes you weak.
 
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PurpleMonkey

Member
May 3, 2018
62
"P****" is socially measured, by which I mean it's total bullshit. You have nothing to prove to anyone, especially something as personal as one's own mortality and happiness.

Fearing death is, like, the most normal thing to fear lol. No shame in that, stranger.
 
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A

AintNoWayOut

Student
Jan 6, 2020
173
"P****" is socially measured, by which I mean it's total bullshit. You have nothing to prove to anyone, especially something as personal as one's own mortality and happiness.

Fearing death is, like, the most normal thing to fear lol. No shame in that, stranger.
i just wish i could get it over with because im sick of living this meaningless, empty existence full of bitterness and envy. speaking of which, im envious of people who are able to go through with their methods and leave this shit world behind.
 
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P

PurpleMonkey

Member
May 3, 2018
62
i just wish i could get it over with because im sick of living this meaningless, empty existence full of bitterness and envy. speaking of which, im envious of people who are able to go through with their methods and leave this shit world behind.
For many people, the pain is either a negligible payoff or an attraction. I'm not going to put words in your mouth but if you're hesitant, it could be a sign that you still have some business left unattended. Would I be wrong in assuming that?
 
Sunset Limited

Sunset Limited

I believe in Sunset Limited
Jul 29, 2019
1,352
I posted a goodbye thread about two weeks ago but I'm still here. I will try again soon. No one is judging you here. Don't judge yourself. We cannot control fear. Remember that fear is part of the CTB attempt, it's normal. Fear is not belong to you, so you are not a pussy because you are afraid :) It's just an ancient impulse.
 
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Zegers

Zegers

Enlightened
Dec 15, 2021
1,758
Listen, my life has been empty for years and yet, the SI is there. It's not a question of being a coward, it's simply a program that we humans have implanted by default.
 
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makethepainstop

makethepainstop

Visionary
Sep 16, 2022
2,029
I never understood calling some one p---y. Are they kidding, ever seen a woman give birth!😮 OUCH to the tenth power! As for having balls, guys with more testerone fear nothing. So a guy who isn't acting aggressively enough, gets told he doesn't have the balls to do something.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,463
Unfortunately we do live in a world where leaving it behind is so unnecessarily difficult after all. I hate how it can be so hard to be free from everything, of course dying should just be as easy as just choosing to never wake again, it can certainly be tiring how ctb involves excessive planning and of course there is the SI which can just prolong our suffering.

We really shouldn't have to struggle so much in finally leaving this world. I also envy those who are gone and don't have to deal with any of this anymore. They are not trapped in this cruel world having to suffer endlessly and to me they really are the lucky ones. I hope that you find what you are looking for.
 
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A

AintNoWayOut

Student
Jan 6, 2020
173
For many people, the pain is either a negligible payoff or an attraction. I'm not going to put words in your mouth but if you're hesitant, it could be a sign that you still have some business left unattended. Would I be wrong in assuming that?
hardly. all that keeps me here is the bleakest hope for "improvement", which is basically just experiencing something new like a relationship, some family, and cowardice.
 
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