How many times a day on average do you think about ctbing?

  • 0-1

    Votes: 0 0.0%
  • 2-5

    Votes: 8 21.1%
  • 5-10

    Votes: 10 26.3%
  • More

    Votes: 20 52.6%

  • Total voters
    38
MiMif

MiMif

I do not live for others to understand me...
Sep 13, 2023
588
Just wondering I think on average I'm a 5-10
 
  • Like
Reactions: Salmon can't swim
Seered Doom

Seered Doom

A nihilist going through an unrelinquished Hell
Sep 9, 2023
911
It's a constant thought that disturbs me more times than I can count and repeatedly shouts over and over
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: Salmon can't swim, Painfu.Ll.suffering, Banshe and 1 other person
MiMif

MiMif

I do not live for others to understand me...
Sep 13, 2023
588
It's a constant thought that disturbs me more times than I can count and repeatedly shouts over and over
Yeah same for me. Though I probably only seriously consider it 5-10x

No it might actually be 2-5x like seriously thinking about doing it that very moment
 
Last edited:
  • Aww..
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: Salmon can't swim, Seered Doom and MeltingBrain
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
38,965
I'm always wishing to fall asleep eternally, pretty much every waking moment. It's all that makes sense and feels right for me, in my case I see wanting to die as the only rational response to being trapped in this dreadful and undesirable existence. The thought of permanently ceasing to exist is all that comforts me so of course I'm always wishing for it, I see it as best that existence is forgotten about.
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: Salmon can't swim and Seered Doom
Namensjemand

Namensjemand

Cursed
Jul 16, 2023
109
Recently more but I picked 5-10. Either because I am concerning myself with its practical execution or because some aspect of my life hits me with such gravitas that suicide just dangles in front illuminated by spotlights marking it as the perfect and only solution to the pointless dumpster fire my existence is. I may even percieve myself as foolish for not taking it. But they are intermixed with impulses of rebellion and wanting to do better and wanting to fight. Just for the hell of it. I mean why not. Death is not eternal sleep. You just fucking entirely disintigrate. Forever. But then, a life can be not worth living.
 
  • Like
Reactions: MiMif
A

alterationitfinds

Member
Sep 21, 2023
84
My current state is that everytime something even slightly inconveniences me, even slightly heightens my anxiety, even slightly puts me at a disadvantage… my immediate next thought is "well it's a good job that i'm not going to be here much longer"
That's why i think about it more than 5-10 times.. because it's the only way i save face for the mean time
 
  • Like
Reactions: Salmon can't swim and MiMif
vitbar

vitbar

Escaped Lunatic
Jun 4, 2023
363
During bad depressive episodes? Once, constantly, from waking to sleep.

Since starting on the new antidepressants it's been only a couple of times a day. Before it was highly dependant on whether I was in a depressive episode and how bad. Between episodes I'd go days without or only a few times a day, during episodes it was many times a day unless really bad.

My current state is that everytime something even slightly inconveniences me, even slightly heightens my anxiety, even slightly puts me at a disadvantage… my immediate next thought is "well it's a good job that i'm not going to be here much longer"
That's why i think about it more than 5-10 times.. because it's the only way i save face for the mean time
This is a mood. It has become almost a reflex for me when faced with stress. A stress reliever even.
 
  • Like
Reactions: MiMif
L

Ligand

Member
Sep 14, 2023
65
It has been my most consistent focus of attention for about an entire year. I think about it all day long. Before that, I thought about it around 1-4 times a day for about 3 years straight.