If you could have a Do Over

[NeverGoodEnuff]

How different would things be today?

When I was 17, in 1968-1969, I asked my parents to let me join the army to become a nurse and serve in Nam. They said NO, that military nurses are just whores for the men. So, being an obedient daughter, I gave up that idea.
I eventually did become a nurse, in 1995, and those were the best years of my life.

I would not have married at age 19 and had children and all of that. I would have enlisted and spent my life nursing in the military, no husband, no children no grandchildren. I would belong somewhere.

How different it would be today. Would it be better? Well, since my problems today are from my children, at least they would be different problems!

What would you do differently?

 

[MichaelNomad123]

I should have:

Continued playing violin at 10.
Left school at 18 and joined military intelligence or studied for my A-levels and went to University like everyone else
Hard committed to my budding eSports career at 19
Left this house at 20 and roamed
Completed my general computer course and opened up a computer repair business
Finished my politics course in my mid 20s instead of walking out of the exam
Hard committed to my potential eSports career and Twitch stream at 26/27
Not got married to a woman that I strongly suspected had unresolved issues with past boyfriends
Not moved back to my abusive childhood home post-divorce

There's probably more, but that's the bones of it

 

[WhiteDespair]

I would not have gone to college and lived with anyone besides my mother.

 

[Infinite Conscious]

Don't bang your head with what could have, should have, been...

At least your parents had been right on one thing... back then, you would have joined the wrong side, as far as moral and principles are involved, the US army were the bad guys, regardless of the brainwashing propaganda mechanisms your nation had been exposed to in order to justify the unjustifiable.

Your destiny was to become a nurse, and you followed your path. The correct way. You spent your time in this world helping others, which is one of the main purposes we have in our lifetimes. Even if you screw-up in the end, in case suicide is a sin after all (which we have no way of knowing), your record and history of compassion and altruism should exempt you from any possible punishment.

We all wish there was a "rewind" button on our body...
Imagine how the world would have been a far better place for everyone... with just a possibility of going back merely 24 hours at a time.
It wouldn't change the course of history on the grand scale, yet it would improve and/or save billions of lives through miniature corrections.

Just an idea for the future simulations of the Creator...
Provide your children with a possibility to suffer less, and You will get more production and use out of them.

 

[sufferingalways]

Don't bang your head with what could have, should have, been...

At least your parents had been right on one thing... back then, you would have joined the wrong side, as far as moral and principles are involved, the US army were the bad guys, regardless of the brainwashing propaganda mechanisms your nation had been exposed to in order to justify the unjustifiable.

Your destiny was to become a nurse, and you followed your path. The correct way. You spent your time in this world helping others, which is one of the main purposes we have in our lifetimes. Even if you screw-up in the end, in case suicide is a sin after all (which we have no way of knowing), your record and history of compassion and altruism should exempt you from any possible punishment.

We all wish there was a "rewind" button on our body...
Imagine how the world would have been a far better place for everyone... with just a possibility of going back merely 24 hours at a time.
It wouldn't change the course of history on the grand scale, yet it would improve and/or save billions of lives through miniature corrections.

Just an idea for the future simulations of the Creator...
Provide your children with a possibility to suffer less, and You will get more production and use out of them.

Have you seen the film "sliding doors?"
Your post reminded me of it. Interesting story and I liked how they did it.

 

[Susannah]

I would have chosen an education in film production instead of journalism. Working with hard news makes you more exposed to depression and dispair. I should have followed my heart and moved to a warmer country. Live in the sun rather than in the dark, cold north. I should have been stronger when my sister died, and I got stuck with my broken mum. All my life I've tried to please other people, and I forgot to take care of myself. Having a child was never right for me. I just went with the flow. This life I live wasn't meant for me. I'm 43 now, but I feel like 80.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I'd not drink alcohol and thus avoid the metabolic hell I'm now suffering in my forties.

Yeah, right.

Working with hard news makes you more exposed to depression and dispair.

Yes it does. I was 14 years in live news conferences. We had a laugh, but we laughed at the most tragic of things.

 

[woxihuanni]

I'd have to literally be born with my current mind and memory for it to work, not a change here and there. And even then, it wouldn't work, because born a monkey.

Ain't I, sissy S., and that is why you kill me for the Abomination?

 

[greebo6]

Too much...far too much.

 

[Pho3nix]

I'd be born at a different time, in a different family, in a different country and with different genetics.

 

[MrBlue]

Probably not, I would just end up the same way, because it's the way I am that got me here, not necessarily my decisions.

 

[clown_17]

The only way I'd be able to escape this outcome is to have better genetics but for life events up until then I'd chose to:

-get help for my problems when younger
-realize that i didn't have to take on everything alone
-spend more time with my family
-learn to like myself
-continue doing what I used to love and avoid competition
-not quit making music
-leave my childhood friends sooner

just a few little things could've made a lot of difference, guess it's too late now though. I'm weak, ill, and probably irreversibly damaged from too much medication

 

[BeHope]

I would never have allowed my photo to be taken for school yearbooks. I had always been really self-conscious over my pictures and only let school take mine because I thought I had to. Possibly stupid, but I really, REALLY hate pictures of myself, especially when they exist in the hands of other people. I also would have stopped myself from going to university and just got a job instead. Lastly, I wouldn't have gotten my cat when I did. I love her, but she was bullied by my Dad for her first year with us before he left the country. She's a sweet and happy girl now but still skittish because of it.

 

[Weather]

This is one of the things I ruminate on all the time. Where would I have changed things? Would it have mattered? Is there anyway to find peace now?

I think If I could pick one thing to change (that I actually had the power to decide differently), I would have left my hometown for college -- I had scholarships, but my own anxiety and feeling responsible for my mother... I couldn't do it. There was a decent university where I am from, and I still got my bachelor's degree, but I really needed to leave THEN. I would have had more options and opportunities. Wouldn't have felt trapped. Wouldn't have met my rapist or my ex-spouse. I just feel like if I had the courage to make that one decision differently, my whole life would be different. Better.

It's a long time ago now. I have a lot of other do-overs I'd want to do too, but that one seems foundational.

 

[NeverEndingProblem]

I wish I had never got into over the top drunken' drinking. I only really did it because of feeling so socially anxious (trying to fit it) - but I took it too far. Smoking weed also screwed me up, and although it was fun listening to psychedelic music while stoned, I would have rather avoided it as it changed the way I think in a negative way. If I hadn't had the the problems with alcohol and weed to the extent I had, I would have had time/energy to focus on building a career and life so I could live somewhat comfortably. Who knows? maybe if I avoided all those negative things I would have fucked it up in a another completely different way as well...

Hindsight is an interesting thing, but not helpful for recovery if you dwell on it IMO (I still do it though). I sort of believe the cards I was dealt in life were completely out of my control in a way, because when I was a child/teenager I never had the education (from my Parents mainly) to help me become a responsible adult.

 

[RubySimon]

I would if I could have a do over, change these things in particular:

• Trastioned much earlier, I knew I was non binary since 16/17, had I begun back then, things would have been easier.
• Never appilied for that job i was told to, unware that it was a trick and i would be kicked off my disability benifit.
• Stuck to my guns and applied to it/eeb design courses instead of letting myself get pressured into attending a college and course i had no interest in for jobs i couldn't handle.
• Put more pressure on medical experts to find out what exactly my learning difficulties/disability is sooner.

 

[Done at Fifty]

Over all, I wouldn't have cared what others thought. Many things I thought I was doing for myself were in retrospect, for society to like and accept me.

Hind sights 20/20 of course, but I believe that if I never cared about the rat race and criticism, I'd live in a different country, have less education, and a lot more money.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I used to want to do over 5 years ago when my car got broken into which caused me to become emotionally distant and miss my chance to be with a girl from work. I've been stewing over that incident and feeling so much hateful rumination for all that time.

Then I met someone even better from here but I don't believe I could do anything different about that situation to change the outcome so instead of having my bitterness and hateful thoughts to console me, I don't really have anything anymore these days...

Maybe if I could go back I'd try to prevent the Communist Revolution in China so my great grandfather wouldn't have killed himself when the communists took his farm and my grandfather would not have had to flee to Taiwan. I probably wouldn't exist if that were the case but at least whoever the equivalent of me is would probably just be some spoiled rich kid in China living off inheritance money instead of a lower middle class American who hates themselves so much.

 

[DetachedDreamer97]

If I could start over, for one... I'll be more assertive and stand up for myself, and spend more time investing in meditation and train myself into becoming something beyond human, or learn how to become a master of lucid dreaming at an early age. I'll hone in my skills and depending on how young I am, I'll become the famous 5-year old artist. The rest, I'll have to improvise.

I almost forgot one thing... I'll cherish all the good parts of my childhood, which includes my time at Easter Seals, being with Nana, my aunt Kathy, and my grandmother, and etcetera, not to mention all the good experiences at school.

 

[AJ95]

There's so much I would do differently if I could go back to being 8 or 9 years old. I hope my entire life would've turned out differently if I'd just had a little bit more insight into who I really was.

 

[Dead beat dad]

How different would things be today?

When I was 17, in 1968-1969, I asked my parents to let me join the army to become a nurse and serve in Nam. They said NO, that military nurses are just whores for the men. So, being an obedient daughter, I gave up that idea.
I eventually did become a nurse, in 1995, and those were the best years of my life.

I would not have married at age 19 and had children and all of that. I would have enlisted and spent my life nursing in the military, no husband, no children no grandchildren. I would belong somewhere.

How different it would be today. Would it be better? Well, since my problems today are from my children, at least they would be different problems!

What would you do differently?

Disclosing my mental and emotional pain to anyone 'IRL'
I should have just kept that box closed and the doors of opportunity would have stayed open...