Discussion If you could fake your death and start a new life, would you?

[yellowroses]

If you had the opportunity to fake your death and start over in a new country, with a new identity, with the guarantee you'd never be discovered- would you do it? Do you think you'd still want to CtB if that was an option for you? What would your ideal new-life look like?

 

[Quinnalyn]

Not really, I have a boyfriend and I'd miss my best friend, my biggest wish is that I had enough money

 

[leavingsoon99]

No. I'm really done with life.

 

[WH101]

I'd definitely give it a shot. If I had the funds to do it. I feel like I would get a year or two down the line and go back to feeling the way I already do. But if I had 10 grand then yeah why not, I'd give I a chance and feel hopeful

 

[Vizzy]

If you had the opportunity to fake your death and start over in a new country, with a new identity, with the guarantee you'd never be discovered- would you do it? Do you think you'd still want to CtB if that was an option for you? What would your ideal new-life look like?

Nope and not everyone can do that, humans are social animals we need people and we seek attention from our family, want to be appreciated when we are successful

My ideal new life would be patience and educated parents who are stable and can teach me things needed to live a successful life, peace in the house, don't want parents who fight always, don't want people who don't deserve to be parents!

 

[sera]

i don't think so? i have a boyfriend and my family and my cat. i love them all. my mental health issues wouldn't dissipate with money and moving away so i would probably still wanna ctb and the whole thing would be pointless

 

[yellowroses]

Nope and not everyone can do that, humans are social animals we need people and we seek attention from our family, want to be appreciated when we are successful

My ideal new life would be patience and educated parents who are stable and can teach me things needed to live a successful life, peace in the house, don't want parents who fight always, don't want people who don't deserve to be parents!

Oh yes, I know not everyone can do that, it was just a hypothetical- it's something I often find myself daydreaming about so was curious what others thoughts were

 

[outrider567]

No, my life is over

 

[cami]

no, i'd still be me with all my fucked up mental health issues so at it's core, life would still be the same.

 

[Vizzy]

Oh yes, I know not everyone can do that, it was just a hypothetical- it's something I often find myself daydreaming about so was curious what others thoughts were

Even if you leave everything and make you own family after many years still in the back of your mind you will be thinking what my parents are doing, what my siblings are doing, what my family members are doing, are they okay, are they thinking about me, are they same like before, are they alive like a lot of questions, I won't be surprised if you reach out to them to find answers for all your questions in the later part of your life

I tried leaving my family many times but I always come back because all these questions are constantly appearing in my head!

 

[magician99]

No.

I would still have the same mental health issues and I'm tired of living on this planet in general, so nothing would change.

 

[Kerrtu]

If my physical health was better, if I had more strength, I'd take my dog and run, never looking back.

But alas, years of anxiety, disordered eating, abuse in all forms by family, abuse from strangers, neighbors…it all seems to have percolated. The loss of my dog has been shattering - he was my baby boy. I will have his picture with me when I CTB.

I began getting sick right before the new year. There was a week where I didn't do a thing except getting up to use the bathroom. I had that "impending sense of doom". Days later I started vomiting blood. Went to the ER close to me, waited many hours and began to slump over in the wheelchair. I was chastised by reception to "sit correctly". Shortly after the scolding, I walked out.

I was sitting outside, booking an Uber to get me home since I didn't want to pass out trying to walk home. 2 nurses approached me, 1 scoffed - "I thought you were sick and now you're playing games on your phone?"

Um, no - showed the screen - I'm booking a ride home through Uber.

Luckily the Uber driver was amazing. I was the last pick up of his night and since I lived close by, he stopped at a convenience store so I could buy electrolyte beverages. Hospital never gave me an IV, even though I was brought by ambulance.


All said - unless I could be with my dog again, no, I wouldn't fake my own death and start a new life somewhere else.

 

[FuneralCry]

I could never wish to exist no matter what, existing to me is pointless and unappealing and of course it's always preferable to cease existing as there is unlimited potential to suffer here, I only wish for perfect non-existence, I could never wish to decay from age, we are only just waiting around for death and to die is the only relief.