Discussion If the most important person in your life asked you to give up CTB, what would you answer?

[Versailles]

As the title says, what would your reaction be if the person most important to you asked you to put your CTB intentions behind you?

 

[mousebot]

It depends on if they truly loved me and wanted me in their life or not. If its just because they feel bad id go ahead

 

[bed]

if they cared enough about me they'd respect my wishes to die.

 

[Versailles]

It depends on if they truly loved me and wanted me in their life or not. If its just because they feel bad id go ahead

Do you think that the fact that he asks you for something like that is an authentic reflection that he matters to you?

 

[ChobaniFlipSmores]

Yes, no questions asked I would. But that's sort of my problem, I'm not self motivated but am highly motivated by others both directly and indirectly.

 

[Apricity]

It depends on if they truly loved me and wanted me in their life or not. If its just because they feel bad id go ahead

The most important person in my life is one of the reasons i want to ctb.

 

[EOL4ME]

I would say no - if the person truly loved me they'd let me make my own choice and understand it does not reflect on how I feel about them nor how important they are to me while I was/am alive.

 

[Ash]

Been there. In the moment, I agreed to keep trying. I even meant it. But nothing changed in the long term and here I am again.

 

[Versailles]

Been there. In the moment, I agreed to keep trying. I even meant it. But nothing changed in the long term and here I am again.

I'm sorry to hear that, do you think it was worth continuing to try for that person?

 

[toforigivelife]

if they cared enough about me they'd respect my wishes to die.

And that they understood that their feelings for you do not negate your suffering.

 

[Ash]

I'm sorry to hear that, do you think it was worth continuing to try for that person?

That's a good question. I'm not sure. I've had some good times since then. But also some really awful times. Plus how I'm feeling now. On balance, it probably wasn't worth it but I don't think I'd change that answer as I cannot imagine how I would feel if the positions were reverend and I asked someone to keep trying for my sake and they said no...

 

[ChobaniFlipSmores]

That's a good question. I'm not sure. I've had some good times since then. But also some really awful times. Plus how I'm feeling now. On balance, it probably wasn't worth it but I don't think I'd change that answer as I cannot imagine how I would feel if the positions were reverend and I asked someone to keep trying for my sake and they said no...

I think it makes a big difference based on the person. Once again, for me I am not highly motivated by internal sources. This lack of motivation is a part of why I want to CTB so if "the most important person to me" asks me to try, I would because that's actually what I need in order to recover. Therefore asking me to not CTB wouldn't be unsupportive. For someone else, it might be unsupportive.

 

[patheticpartner]

I'd do as they wish and not ctb, but then I'd die of thirst or hunger since I'd be too lazy to work for a living lol

 

[exhausteduntreatable]

The most important person in my life did. But I was brought into this world against my will and have been in pain for almost as long as I can remember. I have tried over and over and over again to get better. To recover. Without the slightest improvement. Everytime I wake up I am overcome with a wave of dread and horror. I can't continue to drag myself along indefinitely for him in complete misery.

 

[Helplessturtle79]

My best friend did. I told him I was suicidal, didn't say I was planning on it and didn't dump any sort of high pressure situation on him because I'm not that sort of person.
But I ended up lying. I know that I'd hurt a lot of people if I ctb. I don't care about hurting the people who hurt me, but unfortunately I do have people that care. But they can't fix my life's circumstances. My other friend said she wouldn't know what to do if she lost me. Her life sucks so bad and I'm shocked she hasn't done it.
I do think we have a moral obligation to weigh how our death affects others, but I think at the end of the day, I guess I'd just say "I love you so much, but please respect my choices."

 

[agate]

My child off course. He's the reason I'll hold of as long as is humanly possible

 

[irememberinnocence]

In my case no because:
I am suffering too much due to my longstanding disease that isn't curable and is worsening. I don't feel that my quality of life is good enough and if assisted suicide for health reasons were legal in my country I would have taken it by now.

If my reason for wanting to CBT was a more transitory situation that had hope of improvement eventually, or a mental issue that might be helped through therapy, then I would definitely reconsider for someone close to me.

 

[FuneralCry]

I do not speak to anyone apart from family members. It would be selfish of them to expect me to suffer for decades against my wishes. I have the right to exit this world at a time of my choosing, it is my life, my decision. I have no obligations to stay alive as I did not ask to exist.

 

[Darkmoon Queen]

I've made a rule to not ctb until my dependents die.

If anyone else asked me, I think I'd be quite angry. I highly doubt there'd be any attempt on their part to understand my position or state of mind, it would be nothing more than a self-serving whine. Just because they're important to me doesn't mean they deserve the level of importance I assigned them.

 

[PeacefulTonic]

They asked me to not go through with it because they would be devastated and be in a darker hole than they are now. My best friend and love of my life who I completely betrayed and destroyed things with. But she said she'd also respect my wishes if that's what I really wanted. There's no other option for me besides death, unfortunately. I don't want to bring her anymore pain, but I don't have a choice

 

[Apricity]

The most important person in my life is one of the reasons i want to ctb.

I tried last night, and then I made the mistake of video chatting her. She was crying. She asked me to not do it, and to come home, so I aborted. She hurts me so bad, but I'm so weak against her voice. I want to die, but at the same time, I want spend as much time with her as I can even though she doesn't want me any more. I hate how pathetic I am.

 

[eternalmelancholy]

The most important person in my life is me (have no one else) so suicide would be a self service to avoid a lifetime of unnecessary pain and humiliation.

 

[needingpeace24]

I would

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

"Sure, I won't do it for now. Think I might end up killing myself in my 30s or something, however."

Then, I'd naturally turn around and ctb as soon as possible.

 

[ClownMe]

Well, the most important person in my life is my dog, so if he was talking to me then I must be either drunk or high. I'm not going to ctb until he goes anyway, so this question is somewhat irrelevant to my situation.

 

[nerve]

"So what are you going to do to help me reach a point where I no longer want to end my life?"

Insisting I stick around indefinitely and then being like "oh sorry I can't help you'll have to figure this out on your own" is classic virtue signaling & means nothing. If someone asked me not to ctb but weren't willing to be part of the process of making my life tolerable, I wouldn't feel much guilt or whatever for saying no. "Please don't kill yourself!" is nice and all, but it's just a platitude if there's nothing behind it.

 

[TriggerHappy]

I do think we have a moral obligation to weigh how our death affects others,

Hi, am curious how & why u (&others?) feel this way?
...not wanting to seem contrary or challenging, but surely your moral obligation should include your own (yes, maybe selfish) wishes?!
Are you concerned about the pain etc you would cause others by taking your own life? I once shared your feeling, but it lessens as time goes by :: I truly be,I've im more trouble than what I'm worth.
What if you were partly the cause of family toxicity and reckon your leaving would be a relief / lessen their burden?!
My ctb plans went on hold when my mom got cancer - after 3years struggle she passed away. I then gave myself 1 year.
♤ That was 3 years ago
My point is im always mentally reasoning why I should postpone (while my life prepetually becomes more meaningless to the point I resent myself for deludedly holding on!!)
At my most ugly, my spiteful arrogance is what keeps me fighting.
"If not now, when?!" Is becoming my mantra...

but I think at the end of the day, I guess I'd just say "I love you so much, but please respect my choices."

☆ You are lucky you have family, Iike that, & are so loved,
I mean that.

 

[AntHydra]

Yes, if she started talking to me again, I would not do it. I would give it up just for her. But like this, the time of my ctb is coming closer every hour. And that's alright.

 

[TriggerHappy]

Yes, if she started talking to me again, I would not do it. I would give it up just for her. But like this, the time of my ctb is coming closer every hour. And that's alright.

[☆Fortuna vitrea est; tum cum splendet frangitur ♤ barbaris ex fortuna pendet fides ☆]

 

[Freedom Believer]

No, I want this. You shouldn't want to see me like this anymore. Just let me let go.