My friend, you have every reason to have hope of finding somebody to love you. I get why you feel the way you do and I definitely see your perplexed response to girls choosing utter dick heads over people who would do right by them. However, you could still find somebody with a little help in the right direction. Easy for me to say, I know but totally true! Maybe looking in the right place or more importantly not looking in the wrong places is a factor. Also consider what you want in somebody.
You have options, I promise!
Something you really must consider though is that you can't hang your life on a relationship when you find it. That will put too much pressure on a girl and would understandably push them away before anything begins because who wants that on their consience.
I think there's possibly a little bit of work to do. Maybe some self exploration and some guidance from the right place and you could have what youe after.
I sincerely apologise if this patronising. I only have that post to go on so don't know anything more about you but just by your post I'm scared that you're just a couple of months work away from having what you want and it would be such a waste of potential for you to end it without just giving it that last push.
Girls are actually relatively easy to navigate once you tell yourself it doesn't matter. Those girls who go for the bad giys are often idiots and would be bad for you down the line if you got with them. They don't deserve you. I think you need somebody to help you realise your self worth. On your salery you could hire a relationship coach (just make sure it's not some dick head who's full of shit
and you could look into pick up artists. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't condone pick up artist as a rule but and it's a big but, there it would help you understand women better. So what I'm suggesting to to study from them without actually practicing their methods. Just to help you get your head around dating and female psyche in general. There's nothing wrong with wanting to treat a woman well. That is of course a good thing. You can't worship at their feet though. Particularly at the start. It's a total turn off because it takes all the dating out of it. They have to urn your love and you theirs. It's a two way thing and if you give it all up in the hopes of gaining ground with a girl it will have the opposite result. Again, I may be being patronising but it is a really common mistake with guys who really want a relationship.
All this is basically to say I wish for better for you and think you could have it. :)
