Stick

Stick

Experienced
Aug 31, 2020
269
I know that the general consensus here is that minors shouldn't ctb, but I really wish I had just grown some balls and done it when I was 13 like I thought I would. I've become the person I spent my whole life avoiding.
 
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Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
I know how you feel. I wish I had done it when I was 14 when I was getting bullied
 
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T

TimeToBiteTheDust

Visionary
Nov 7, 2019
2,322
I know how you feel. I wish I had done it when I was 14 when I was getting bullied
Didn't you enjoy anything in your life after 14?
 
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R

rt1989526

Paragon
Aug 2, 2020
935
I agree, I wish I was aborted. But how would you have done it at that age?
 
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DeathNoot

DeathNoot

Student
Feb 19, 2020
137
Same but I totally would have screwed it up and survived
 
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BitterlyAlive

BitterlyAlive

---
Apr 8, 2020
1,635
I wish I did it when I was 12. Such a waste of life.
 
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C

checkouttime

Visionary
Jul 15, 2020
2,904
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Panna

Panna

Enlightened
Aug 31, 2020
1,006
I agree, I wish I was aborted. But how would you have done it at that age?
I mean hanging is universal and available to any age, kaitlyn davis is a prime example of this.
 
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T

TimeToBiteTheDust

Visionary
Nov 7, 2019
2,322
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É

Élégie

Student
Sep 24, 2019
143
Same. I wish I had done it when I was around 16. My life has been going downhill since then.
 
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G

Ghost2211

Archangel
Jan 20, 2020
6,017
I should have done it at 15. I was too scared and weak. I don't know how or why I kept going.
 
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Shades of Grey

Shades of Grey

Student
Jun 17, 2020
183
I walked away from a high-speed single car MVA that should have killed me in my late teens. (It was not intentional.) My last thought before impact was relief... that it was finally over, and nobody would have to know that I actually wanted to die. I was incensed when I woke up a short time later, very much alive.

For decades, I have driven by the site of that accident and felt a deep, inexplicable sadness that I survived. At the time, I felt that I couldn't die by suicide. There had been other suicides close to me, and I worried about the impact that mine might have on family and friends.

I concocted elaborate plans for a freak "accidental" death (which I didn't end up following through on due to the appearance of the warm, fuzzy four-legged obligation I've spent the past 18 years slogging through this existence on behalf of), and took advantage of potentially fatal situations to no avail. Fought like hell to stay alive for others. In retrospect, I feel nothing but regret.
 
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Stick

Stick

Experienced
Aug 31, 2020
269
But how would you have done it at that age?
My original plan was to stab myself in the hear. Which wouldn't have worked that well, but still. I used to live by a big forest and no one would have found me.
I walked away from a high-speed single car MVA that should have killed me in my late teens. (It was not intentional.) My last thought before impact was relief... that it was finally over, and nobody would have to know that I actually wanted to die. I was incensed when I woke up a short time later, very much alive.

For decades, I have driven by the site of that accident and felt a deep, inexplicable sadness that I survived. At the time, I felt that I couldn't die by suicide. There had been other suicides close to me, and I worried about the impact that mine might have on family and friends.

I concocted elaborate plans for a freak "accidental" death (which I didn't end up following through on due to the appearance of the warm, fuzzy four-legged obligation I've spent the past 18 years slogging through this existence on behalf of), and took advantage of potentially fatal situations to no avail. Fought like hell to stay alive for others. In retrospect, I feel nothing but regret.
Damn, I'm so sorry you had to go through that. You were so close... I thought of trying to do an accidental death, too, but any accidents I could think of would involve other people witnessing or feeling at fault. I really admire you staying here for others, I'm doing the same thing right now, but not as long as you have.
 
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Nem

Nem

Drs suck mega ass!
Sep 3, 2018
1,489
Yep, had a failed attempt when I was younger and now things are 10x worse

Peace/hugs/death
 
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R

rt1989526

Paragon
Aug 2, 2020
935
I mean hanging is universal and available to any age, kaitlyn davis is a prime example of this.

Fair enough. I'm too stupid and inept to successfully hang myself as an adult let alone adolescent, which only makes me feel shittier.
 
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Panna

Panna

Enlightened
Aug 31, 2020
1,006
Fair enough. I'm too stupid and inept to successfully hang myself as an adult let alone adolescent, which only makes me feel shittier.
For what it's worth mate, i'm too stupid to do it too. The eldest of all my siblings, and I always master stuff after its old news for everyone else, even the one ten years younger.
 
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nitroautnz

nitroautnz

Specialist
Sep 11, 2020
361
Weirdly i don't regret not doing it when i was the same age, my life is definitely worse now that at the time. But i manage to achieve the objectives i fix myself at this time, and i would definitely wouldn't have succeeded in my ctb anyway. But i can understand that you and other people here don't feel the same. I wish you guys could find a way to stay longer and be ok with it until you decide that now you can catch the bus happily too
 
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262653

262653

Cluesome
Apr 5, 2018
1,733
Is this a contest about whose life went shit as early in the childhood as possible? Because oh I so want to participate.
 
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MewtwoIsAlive

MewtwoIsAlive

Suffering
Jul 11, 2020
215
I wish I did it when I first felt depressed, at 17-18
 
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ARW3N

ARW3N

Melancholia
Dec 25, 2019
396
I hope this doesn't upset anybody, but I wish my two failed suicide attempts years ago had succeeded. They were very serious attempts.
 
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BPD Barbie

BPD Barbie

Visionary
Dec 1, 2019
2,361
I wish I had succeeded when I had my first attempt at 14, it's a shame I knew nothing about what I was doing and just took Paracetamol to overdose. It's one of my biggest regrets to be honest.
 
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XYZ

XYZ

I just can’t get these damn wrists to bleed
Jul 22, 2020
800
I would have saved myself a whole lot of heartache if I had died when I was a kid. Life as a teen, a young adult and now a middle aged fuck up= no bueno.
 
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ARW3N

ARW3N

Melancholia
Dec 25, 2019
396
I wish I had succeeded when I had my first attempt at 14, it's a shame I knew nothing about what I was doing and just took Paracetamol to overdose. It's one of my biggest regrets to be honest.
Unfortunately, I made the same mistake with one of my attempts when I overdosed on paracetamol and vomited the whole lot out. It gave me a hell of a bellyache but not the desired outcome I had intended.
 
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TheGoodGuy

TheGoodGuy

Visionary
Aug 27, 2018
2,996
I know that the general consensus here is that minors shouldn't ctb, but I really wish I had just grown some balls and done it when I was 13 like I thought I would. I've become the person I spent my whole life avoiding.
People will remember you as the person you are now so had I done it in my teens as I planned they would remember me that way a guy with style, friends, who was fun to hang out with if I did it now I would be known as the ugly lonely, boring dressed loser that I have become.

Like the speech in Breaking Bad Walt gives about cancer treatment where he talks about how he would lose his hair, become skinny because of nausea and so sick he wouldn´t be able to do anything and his family would even had to help him take a shit or pee and he says "that is how you will remember me, that´s the worst part" and that speech is so true like two people I was close to in my teen years who died people will always remember them as beautiful young people that was fun, had style etc. they will in essence be forever young and reminded that way. Now the years just fly away can you imagine it´s been 7 years since GTA V came out or 4 years since Moana came out? It´s so scary to think about I feel like they just came out maybe a year tops.
 
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lostangel

lostangel

Enlightened
Mar 22, 2019
1,051
If I died at 15 I would have missed nothing meaningful, I wish I did it back then.
 
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W

WFJ74

Student
Aug 18, 2020
150
Yup I know the feeling. I attempted at 19 and failed and barely a day goes by I don't wish I'd succeeded.
 
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whenlavaflows

whenlavaflows

Member
Sep 21, 2020
86
I hate to say this. My parents had a daughter before I was born that died.
I honestly think this is some sort of sick joke and that I really should have been the one to die, not her.

I was so close to doing it when I was 20. Now at 25, same thing you said, I've turned into the person that I least wanted to be.
 
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Deleted member 19654

Deleted member 19654

Working towards recovery.
Jul 9, 2020
1,628
Sometimes I feel like I should have been the sibling that died in a miscarriage. I may have had some good times in life but overall, it just wasn't worth it.
 
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