Venting I wish I could kill myself and see what happens as an aftermath before dying permanently

[starscourge_19]

I'm curious I just want to see what would people think after I do it. How would my family react and stuff. Then I'd like to die off for good

 

[przeciwwymiotne]

Me too

 

[FuneralCry]

It's understandable wanting to see people's reactions out of curiosity, but I personally would not see it as being my concern. It doesn't mean anything to me how people would react if I was to die as I would simply not be there at that point.

 

[mentalhealthfighter]

Perhaps the afterlife allows for this.

 

[FrozenMango]

Nobody would react to my death or disappearance. I don't care and they don't care

 

[theboy]

Sometimes I fantasize about it. After I die, I see what consequences I leave in my environment

 

[Death is my goal]

don't think I'd like to know..

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

It's amazing how little I care…

 

[chronicallybroken]

I think it would be interesting to see if people said fake nice things about me and talked about my 'strengths' - whether they're true or not - or said a depressing "she struggled with mental illness her whole life"
Real talk though I'd be interested to see who cared but my mother would be devastated so I wouldn't like to see that

 

[👁️👃👁️]

I wish I could see what happened both if I stayed alive and if I killed myself before I did it

 

[Life_and_Death]

what my funeral probably looks like lol

I've been dancing at my funeral
Waiting for you to arrive
I was hoping you'd look beautiful
Dancing with tears in your eyes
But nobody came, what a shame, shame, shame

ive told a couple people about signing up for MAiD. 2 havent said anything and the other im currently giving space so he can process it, but i cant see anymore then like 5 people showing up and even then, it depends on my life circumstances at that point. theyd show up if they knew to, but they might not know. i dont have any family, just a couple friends that seem to care. i dont even know why theyre making a deal about MAiD, all i do is complain that my life sucks and im suicidal. plus, its not going to be updated for like 10months (i could be thinking of something else but its around that time) you have 10mnths to change my mind, instead of panicking about a decision almost a year away and maybe try legitimately changing my mind?? just a thought
i went off a bit, i seem to have been doing that, sorry. i have a bit on my mind rn...

 

[ctbontime]

these thoughts of wanting to observe of the aftermath of your suicide and see the emotional consequences of it are a product of the human condition or rather your human condition. If we are to actually be emancipated from our corporeal forms and retain existence, we would no longer be affected by the human condition and i think, would not be able to care about the aftermath of suicide.

i really hope for this because if not, it would be a special kind of hell awaiting those who commit suicide then...

 

[Marktheghost]

I think it would be interesting to see if people said fake nice things about me and talked about my 'strengths' - whether they're true or not - or said a depressing "she struggled with mental illness her whole life"
Real talk though I'd be interested to see who cared but my mother would be devastated so I wouldn't like to see that

People would probably be more likely to say horrible things about me, claiming my problems were my own fault, or claiming that wanting to get out and meet people was unrealistic or whatever!

 

[akana]

I always thought about this, it was the only thing keeping me alive for a while at one point. At least I still cared abt shit a bit more back then

 

[Mjølnir]

I'm curious I just want to see what would people think after I do it. How would my family react and stuff. Then I'd like to die off for good

Same. I have written some pages explaining my reasons so I hope there is some kind of comfort in that for the ones I leave behind. My main concern is my daughter. She is the only thing holding me back atm.

 

[Eternal Oblivion]

That's one disire I never had...

don't think I'd like to know..

Yeah...

 

[hamvil]

Me too actually :)

 

[oohiniyorafaad]

I used to think this way when I was younger, but now I know the only way to be determined enough to ctb is to remind myself that nothing on this Earth will be of any concern to me or have any power over me anymore once I am gone.

 

[jigsaw_falling]

same, sadly i cant just be a ghost for a bit and to get closure and see what the aftermath is, and have to make peace with the fact that when i die that's it i guess

 

[mObinDEc]

don't think I'd like to know..

Same. I know that I am the only child my mother has a close relationship with. I am really all she has. When I commit suicide... I don't think I would like to know how it affected her afterwards. I think that's the coward in me speaking, though.