I wish I could go.now

[NumbCat]

I have been off work for 5 weeks due to suicidal ideation. I'm on new meds and honestly it's not better but today is the day I go back in like an hour actually. If I had pills or something I would just end it. I don't think people understand how sometimes it just doesn't go away. On top tof that I have a fever but I have to go in. I wish I could leave right now. Why is this so hard?

 

[moya117]

I have no words, I don't know what you're going through in life, but I know for sure that it's hard, ig people like us just live in a hard mode. I really wish I could hug you rn, because I feel the same about the suicidal part, it's just doesn't go away that easily.

May you find peace, where and whatever path you take <3

 

[FuneralCry]

The unfortunate reality is that there is just no relief from suffering in this world and it's true that life is just so unnecessarily cruel, to me it's very much understandable just wishing to be gone. I find it horrible how existing here can very easily get much worse with no limit as to how much we can suffer, I see existing here as being an undeserved punishment.

 

[NumbCat]

I have been off work for 5 weeks due to suicidal ideation. I'm on new meds and honestly it's not better but today is the day I go back in like an hour actually. If I had pills or something I would just end it. I don't think people understand how sometimes it just doesn't go away. On top tof that I have a fever but I have to go in. I wish I could leave right now. Why is this so hard?

Well I am doing a little better, but I feel like it's just temporary. It comes and goes. I get a scared filling in the pit of my stomach like I'm falling suddenly and then the suicidal ideation sets in again and I start feeling lonely and think about the past, usually end up texting my ex. I feel like you have to either be a fool or a psychopath to feel happy in this world.