Venting I will never be able to see what’s supposedly so “tragic” about suicide

[FuneralCry]

In fact to me suicide would be something positive as it's the way to escape from this hellish, harmful existence, there's no sadness in the absence of all suffering, in fact the thought of non-existing is all that comforts me. I envy those who managed to ctb, they are the only fortunate ones to me, I see so much beauty in ceasing to exist.
For me, voluntary death as a beautiful release from such a cruel, undesirable existence rather than a tragedy, how is it tragic if one is now at permanent peace for all eternity, for me suicide is suffering, torment and pain prevention, I find it disturbing how something so evil as life even exists at all. It's disturbing how there is no limit as to how much one can suffer as long as they exist, the existence of life is what is tragic to me instead, existence is such an abomination.

And I don't see how death is tragic in general as we are literally all just going to die anyway with eventually it being like most people never existed at all. Human existence is so meaningless and is just destined to be forgotten about, death really is the most normal thing. And I find comfort in the thought of death erasing everything, I only want to disappear into nothingness, I'd be glad to be eternally free from the evil that is existence, to exist means to suffer so unnecessarily all while risking experiencing much worse suffering at any moment and under no circumstances would I ever want to suffer, I just wish for the peace of non-existence.

 

[walkingdead2023]

I guess it's just the idea of finding someone you love " killed by their own hand" is terrifying.. I don't have kids or siblings so I'm not sure how the feelings but from reading articles… looking at how much I'm suffering people should be happy for me when I'm finally dead.

 

[Yuki_03]

since i was little i had a fascination for death. i wanted to become a forensic doctor, but my parents wouldnt let me. they think of death as such a horrible thing, the opposite of life. i think of it as the sunset, beautiful last moments. i too cant understand the fear of death.

 

[Chinaski]

There is a world of difference between feeling desperately suicidal and having a morbid, monomanaiacal, fetishistic fascination with death coupled with a half-baked, adolescent pseudo philosophy and users of this forum all too frequently confuse the latter with the former.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Not intending to berate you but...

My Bright Shining Star

This is a blog about my experience and feelings over the suicide of my 23 year old daughter Kaitlyn on 4-11-13

welding81.wordpress.com

This is a blog that was started by a woman after her daughter suddenly killed herself.

It abruptly ends because the mother killed herself a year and a half after her daughter did, using the exact same method.

Given the magnitude of the devastation she felt it is amazing she even made it a year, or even six months.

The daughter outwardly had a perfect life as a happy and successful medical student and ever sought any help or told anyone for reasons she took with her. Her suicide was not a done deal.

 

[Naked Weapon]

The people who call suicide a "selfish" act are the selfish ones. They claim people for themselves, collect them like little figurines, and when one of the "figurines" wishes to pursue an act of their own volition, the collector throws a fit and thinks only of what their little toy's absence will bring them. We are not made to live for the sake of other people. We are not made to make other people happy. We live for ourselves no matter where our desires and needs take us. Other people needn't claim responsibility for our actions. Pursuing death is not a tragedy, no, and for many it is a freedom.

 

[Iamtired]

The people who call suicide a "selfish" act are the selfish ones. They claim people for themselves, collect them like little figurines, and when one of the "figurines" wishes to pursue an act of their own volition, the collector throws a fit and thinks only of what their little toy's absence will bring them. We are not made to live for the sake of other people. We are not made to make other people happy. We live for ourselves no matter where our desires and needs take us. Other people needn't claim responsibility for our actions. Pursuing death is not a tragedy, no, and for many it is a freedom.

In the context of suicide: yes, I believe in suicide as a freedom. To go how peacefully you want to go.
And on the flip side to what you said: we live for ourselves no matter where our desires and needs take us."
Well….yes but this poses a problem outside of the context of suicide.
Can you live in a world purely hedonistic?
We are also not made to hurt others needlessly for the sake of making ourselves happy?
That's the moral dilemma…..can you live with any honor if you have to hurt others to gain for yourself? Probably not. Humans are a disease on the earth.

 

[Naked Weapon]

Can you live in a world purely hedonistic?
We are also not made to hurt others needlessly for the sake of making ourselves happy?
That's the moral dilemma…..can you live with any honor if you have to hurt others to gain for yourself? Probably not. Humans are a disease on the earth.

I say what I say, too, in the context of my experiences. When I first began to express my suicidal ideation, my mother's response was "No. You're not dying. If you die, I have to die, too". My boyfriend, too shared this line of thought. In the context of the larger world, however, doctors mistake removing a person from dangerous objects for "treatment", thus they claim responsibility for your being saved. Look at any news articles about people who have CTB, especially in contexts like Kenneth Law. They are "victims" of "murder". These individuals do not leave, but "are taken". There is no independence in most conversations about suicide. These people think of the impact of their personal lives rather than what the "victim" was going through. Humans are inherently, to some extent, hedonistic; but we are often incapable of seeing the world through another person's eyes, too.

 

[Proteus]

There is a world of difference between feeling desperately suicidal and having a morbid, monomanaiacal, fetishistic fascination with death coupled with a half-baked, adolescent pseudo philosophy and users of this forum all too frequently confuse the latter with the former.

I mean, I have disagreements with OP, but I also wonder how many the former influences the latter. If someone has been suicidal for all their life, can't cope and have exhausted every defense mechanism for over 20 years, would it be that rare for their view on life to change this much?

I see your angle. I've personally felt attacked by her since I support recovery, I myself chose living, and I've wondered the same as you. But OP mental state is definitely not good, and she doesn't the world as you and I. Maybe being this bad for so long can wrap one's mind without they realizing. She said, since birth, being incapable of feeling pleasure, paired with some physical and mental illnesses. Consider what she knows will always be limited by that.

 

[Pluto]

The Cambridge Dictionary defines tragic as follows:

tragic adjective
very sad, often involving death and suffering:

Thus, suicide literally entailing tragedy is not disputable to any reasonable person. On the other hand, a psychological impairment that blocks normal emotional responses to suffering and death (sadness, grief, anger) is unfortunately something that can happen. It is also a situation that needs to be treated with extreme caution.

 

[Iamtired]

I say what I say, too, in the context of my experiences. When I first began to express my suicidal ideation, my mother's response was "No. You're not dying. If you die, I have to die, too". My boyfriend, too shared this line of thought. In the context of the larger world, however, doctors mistake removing a person from dangerous objects for "treatment", thus they claim responsibility for your being saved. Look at any news articles about people who have CTB, especially in contexts like Kenneth Law. They are "victims" of "murder". These individuals do not leave, but "are taken". There is no independence in most conversations about suicide. These people think of the impact of their personal lives rather than what the "victim" was going through. Humans are inherently, to some extent, hedonistic; but we are often incapable of seeing the world through another person's eyes, too.

I understand. Believe me I do. I didn't mean this to be contrarian. I responded in a way meant to pose a question: can we exist as a species that's purely hedonistic, materialistic, and selfish? Altruism, in my opinion, doesn't really even exist unless in the context of the doing for others's aligning with the person's interests to some degree.. And I think the answer is no, because if everything is self serving then it's inevitable we get rid of ourselves in the end. Others have to get hurt in order or another to "thrive". It's pure greed.

But that also doesn't mean that there aren't very good people out there capable of putting themselves in others positions, even briefly, to understand the pain someone else experiences. It's just not as common and a rarity.

 

[theboy]

what is tragic are the consequences that you leave to the family

 

[Squidward]

The tragedy of death has been painfully obvious since I first started refusing to watch any movie about a dog. (Crying gives me headaches.)

What's really confusing to me is how it often seems to be considered more tragic than deaths by accident, disease, or even overdose...

It's apparently to be presumed all of these victims went out with the default desire to continue living; But shouldn't that involuntarily loss of a desired potential be the most tragic part about the whole death ordeal?

Why does there seem no solace for my loved ones to salvage out of the fact that I've desired my way towards voluntarily surrendering my life over the years?