Venting I was so close

[Fondlemeken]

I almost did it. I had the 9mm in my hand, said my goodbye to my pup, the only one I know that truly loves me. Gave her extra food and water so that she'd be ok till my roommate came home this afternoon. I had my spot picked out and everything. Everything was ready to go but then the feeling faded and once again im left with emptiness. I sank so far down into that dark lake that I could finally do it but something pulled me out again and whoever or whatever it is, I hate them so much.



I almost had it but now it's back to an existence I never wanted to be apart of. Hope yalls day is somewhat decent

 

[R_N]

Don't be too hard on yourself, ctb is not easy. If it was everyone here would do it immediately. You tried and it is fine to fail.
Spend some time with your pup, the bus is not going anywhere.

 

[GinaIsReady]

What a nightmare. So sorry.

 

[Daffodil]

You've chosen a really violent way to go, so it's not a shocker you are struggling. Don't be hard on yourself. Remember to leave a note for the roommate so they don't enter the premises and see you. Better they not enter and immediately call 911.

 

[Fondlemeken]

You've chosen a really violent way to go, so it's not a shocker you are struggling. Don't be hard on yourself. Remember to leave a note for the roommate so they don't enter the premises and see you. Better they not enter and immediately call 911.

I had a bunch of text messages i was going to have my phone send a few hours later, my spot was a secluded part of town.

What a nightmare. So sorry.

Thanks, it really does mean a lot to me. I ended up waking up this morning and grabbed my pup, cried and apologized
Here's my pup for anyone who wants to see her

 

[Guizin239]

she is beautiful!