will i have the guts the courage to comment? since the beginning of this year i've struggled with this... she told me without details i couldn't believe, wanted to think she cheated on me and felt bad, but her reactions seemed way past guilt.
also said she considered doing that, (since "id never be able to love her again") foolish of her, thinking that...
haven't asked enough details, as painful is it for me as it is for her.
The whole year has been ... depersonalization from my part
She tried to treat me like you said. emphasizing that "Nothing can really destroy true love and that she would be unable to share touch imagine other person rather than me. blablabla" but no, last week i was worried about the time it took for her to come home, turned out she dumped me because "of my depression" and humiliated me with few words
i can't understand how why , anything. i don't feel angry at her. but at life
i cant understand none of it,. it doesnt make any sense. and i refuse to believe she "faked" all that suffering... but also have a hard time "thinking about "pertinent questions" - maybe because they're too painful to know - maybe because "she went over"
I spent more than 20 years (not at once) but about the same case , on the phone with female police officers who couldn't do much without her testimony... i can say that she... didn't "destroy" me telling it... but this "fact" no matter how much % is truth or fiction.. this broke me
even if i had caught (i did a .. quite impressive recon job) was able to cross-reference the few things she said, locations she would have gone through, according to time. got hold of a few street cam footages (very eerie dark place... from the dozens of pictures i showed her, one in specific made her cry and sob and then.... it was it
Next day. she was worried "at the amount of police vehicles cruising on the street" not even, if, the punishment for this unspeakable thing had been applied. no amount of pain or suffering caused to the individual(s) none of this will ever undone. sorry being disconnexed
if you are willing to go through and tell him, theres no justice in this world that set things right. but its not about "revenge".. "justice"
Its simply about disencouraging, making people who think they're smart enough to not get caught - suffer
and if she was lying.. and in fact wanted and later regretted.. so be it, at least its less painful ... nonetheless she was able during this year, to talk about "intimate things" whereas i .. gradually lost my mind and tried to stay on this side only because "she insisted she her life was over without me" ... well, now who's here about to go desperate and forget about "Mercyful End" "Justice" "Innocence" "guilt"
Be really careful and please i'd recommend talking with female professionals.. in dealing with this "unnamed issue" .. before trying to say anything to him.. that is.. if he cares enough about you.. as you cared asking opinion on what to do.
please get me out of here
