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Experienced
- Mar 5, 2022
- 226
I've confirmed that the SN I could potentially buy is 99%. I found a place to get antiemetics, paracetamol, and an antacid. I even have chosen the candy I want to eat just so the taste of everything won't make me cry. Everything would be approximately $16 (including shipping, but could be less if I bought during some sort of megasale event) and I wouldn't get into any trouble because SN isn't much of a known method where I live. I'm literally in the perfect situation and could end it. Everything could be over ASAP within 3-5 business days or whatever. Fuck, I literally want things to be over soon. I can't stand everything anymore.
But as I type this, and I have everything ready to order, I just can't bring myself to do it. I don't know why anymore. I know I'm a burden to everyone around me. I despise myself and every inch of my being. I want to be over and gone, but ordering everything I need is way harder than it sounds. Why is it so hard?
But as I type this, and I have everything ready to order, I just can't bring myself to do it. I don't know why anymore. I know I'm a burden to everyone around me. I despise myself and every inch of my being. I want to be over and gone, but ordering everything I need is way harder than it sounds. Why is it so hard?