Venting I want to die pretty

[sereneidentity]

i feel unloved I feel ugly I feel shitty .. I can't love but I want to . At the same time even if I would, would there even be someone that would love me back ? I've always just loved and got hurt at the end . Maybe that's why I can't love anymore


Why can't I be enough why can't I be pretty and be loved for just looking pretty

Preferably I'd just jump out of a building but my death would look gruesome so I'd rather die while looking pretty … somewhat atleast

How can I die pretty

I just want to be loved

I just want to be seen

I don't want pitty I don't want someone to help me I just want someone to love me I just want to be seen as pretty and loveable

Why am I getting treated as a ghost by the people who are actively in my life

 

[Ozzyno]

Women always told me I was good looking but that didn't help, some of us will be alone forever. Being pretty feels better I don't tell you otherwise, but I feel pretty and I still want to die everyday I wake up.

 

[sereneidentity]

Women always told me I was good looking but that didn't help, some of us will be alone forever. Being pretty feels better I don't tell you otherwise, but I feel pretty and I still want to die everyday I wake up.

I don't want to be alone and I don't want to be ugly I just want to be loved and idk if that would help but I feel like it would change me in some way

 

[willow115]

To be blunt, I think bodies get ugly quick. We're better off with a pulse if being cute, pretty and attractive is a desire.

Don't go mad over the looks stuff. Invest in yourself and your mind and the looks follow.

 

[Ozzyno]

I don't want to be alone and I don't want to be ugly I just want to be loved and idk if that would help but I feel like it would change me in some way

Oh yea feeling love helps a lot in my opinion. People always tells me 'You have to be happy alone to be happy in a relationship'. Well I've been happy alone, I am just getting tired of it, tired of the boredom and the lack of emotions when I wake up in the morning. I think this is also what you experience, right?

 

[sereneidentity]

To be blunt, I think bodies get ugly quick. We're better off with a pulse if being cute, pretty and attractive is a desire.

Don't go mad over the looks stuff. Invest in yourself and your mind and the looks follow.

Im just so impatient I just can't wait for someone to actually like me for me they all just like pretty people

Oh yea feeling love helps a lot in my opinion. People always tells me 'You have to be happy alone to be happy in a relationship'. Well I've been happy alone, I am just getting tired of it, tired of the boredom and the lack of emotions when I wake up in the morning. I think this is also what you experience, right?

Yes it feels like I'm watching people like I'm the watcher of a movie but I'm not part of it

I just feel so uninvolved and unloved
What if they just start liking me once I'm gone .. that's usually what happens right ? Maybe atleast then people will notice my presence

 

[Ozzyno]

Im just so impatient I just can't wait for someone to actually like me for me they all just like pretty people

Yes it feels like I'm watching people like I'm the watcher of a movie but I'm not part of it

I just feel so uninvolved and unloved

But yea with time looks gets less important for people. How old are you? If you are comfortable sharing. You are a woman, you can't look that bad, I think you are exaggerating.

 

[sereneidentity]

But yea with time looks gets less important for people. How old are you? If you are comfortable sharing. You are a woman, you can't look that bad, I think you are exaggerating.

I might not look bad but I don't stand out I'm just regular I'm just getting ignored

I'm 18

 

[Ozzyno]

I might not look bad but I don't stand out I'm just regular I'm just getting ignored

I'm 18

Well at that age you shouldn't worry too much about these things. Unfortunately our generation grew up retarded looking at Instagram and the other social media setting up ridiculous standards.

 

[sereneidentity]

Well at that age you shouldn't worry too much about these things. Unfortunately our generation grew up retarded looking at Instagram and the other social media setting up ridiculous standards.

My uncle asked me if I'm lesbian because I never had an actually boyfriend and that stuck with me .. am I supposed to actually have a boyfriend now ..? Am I late? after all all of my friends have relationships and I'm the only one who never experienced true love .. then from that point on I noticed people don't even look my way I started to focus on every detail and noticed people treat me like im
Not even there .

 

[Ozzyno]

My uncle asked me if I'm lesbian because I never had an actually boyfriend and that stuck with me .. am I supposed to actually have a boyfriend now ..? Am I late? after all all of my friends have relationships and I'm the only one who never experienced true love .. then from that point on I noticed people don't even look my way I started to focus on every detail and noticed people treat me like im
Not even there .

Oh yea you are getting my treatment too… I am 26 and I've been in a relationship of two years then nothing else. People and girls always tell me 'why are you not in a relationship?' or they just assume I am in one. Then no one hits on me or it seems like they don't see me as a potential partner, they always find excuses. Now after years like this I am anxious about myself even if people close to me keep telling me I am completely fine and I know I am. When I get close to a person I start get the feeling that I should be alone (even if we are just knowing each other).

Just don't be anxious about yourself. Take your time and someone will finally see you. I am unfortunate because of my shitty position and my extravagance… you will be fine.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

I might not look bad but I don't stand out I'm just regular I'm just getting ignored

I'm 18

You shouldn't worry too much about this. 18 is young and a lot of people don't end up finding a partner until they are in their 20s, 30s, and so on. I didn't get my first bf until several months ago and I'm 21. He confessed his love for me when I was 20. I've only been hit on irl once before too (if you don't count that one time where I was hit on by a middle-schooler back when I was 15 (though I still don't know if he was being genuine or was just playing a prank on me), along with one other time but we were both 10 and both forgot about it pretty soon after) and that also happened only a couple of months before.

Basically, you shouldn't beat yourself up over this. There's a good chance that you'll probably experience it at some point in life and even if you don't that doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with you.

 

[sereneidentity]

You shouldn't worry too much about this. 18 is young and a lot of people don't end up finding a partner until they are in their 20s, 30s, and so on. I didn't get my first bf until several months ago and I'm 21. He confessed his love for me when I was 20. I've only been hit on irl once before too (if you don't count that one time where I was hit on by a middle-schooler back when I was 15 (though I still don't know if he was being genuine or was just playing a prank on me), along with one other time but we were both 10 and both forgot about it pretty soon after) and that also happened only a couple of months before.

Basically, you shouldn't beat yourself up over this. There's a good chance that you'll probably experience it at some point in life and even if you don't that doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with you.

No guy even wanted to be friends with me haha no, one guy even bullied me for liking him and made fun of me infront all of his friends and ended up getting a girlfriend one day after he acted like he liked me just to shatter all of my feelings completly ..I just had this online relationship thing wich wasn't even a real relationship we never met and he just saw pictures of me with filters .. irl I don't look like that in the slightest and I didn't even act myself with him cause all I wanted was his love and I couldn't even love him I just acted so selfishly and ofc that's why it didn't work out either … what have I done to deserve this treatment am I really so unlovable.. I'm even acting so desperate and it makes me feel shitty

 

[Ozzyno]

No guy even wanted to be friends with me haha no, one guy even bullied me for liking him and made fun of me infront all of his friends and ended up getting a girlfriend one day after he acted like he liked me just to shatter all of my feelings completly ..I just had this online relationship thing wich wasn't even a real relationship we never met and he just saw pictures of me with filters .. irl I don't look like that in the slightest and I didn't even act myself with him cause all I wanted was his love and I couldn't even love him I just acted so selfishly and ofc that's why it didn't work out either … what have I done to deserve this treatment am I really so unlovable.. I'm even acting so desperate and it makes me feel shitty

I would be friend with you if you were not this much younger than me. So if I would it means that there must be someone like me but maybe 6 years younger than me. Don't feel bad for nothing.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

No guy even wanted to be friends with me haha no one guy even bullied me for liking him and made fun of me infront all of his friends and ended up getting a girlfriend one day after he acted like he like me just to shatter all of my feelings completly .. what have I done to deserve this treatment am I really so unlovable

Some people are just assholes and a lot of them are just projecting their own issues onto you. You shouldn't let dumbasses like that get you. If he was really all that then he wouldn't have bullied you like a pathetic insecure bitch boy. Assuming that this was in high school, it is important to note that this behaviour doesn't necessarily reflect what typically goes on in the wider world. There are a lot of cases of people going through this only to end up being considered much better looking by wider society than what their peers in high school made it seem. Along with that, people's preferences when it comes to a partner are subjective. There is a good chance that there are people out there that find you attractive but you don't know that because they keep it to themselves.

I would be friend with you if you were not this much younger than me. So if I would it means that there must be someone like me but maybe 6 years younger than me. Don't feel bad for nothing.

Being friends with someone younger than you isn't a big deal. We are all adults here.

 

[Ozzyno]

Well if you want a friend I have Discord, let me know